Being replaced
- 4herpleasure89
- OHW Addict
- Posts: 2003
- Joined: Wed Feb 19, 2014 10:41 am
- Location: Southeast Florida
Re: Being replaced
Thanks for your interest. There have been many ups and downs emotionally for me. I don’t see any danger of losing my wife but i sometimes fear losing her emotionally since like the op, she gets hotter sex from her boyfriend and she craves it.
I find myself turned on followed by being completely out of sorts. Her other lovers don’t make me feel threatened like this but this guy is in love with her and she is with him. My wife is aware of my concerns and is working to alleviate them. All-nighters are to be rare as they are the hardest for me to deal with. Other guys need to be in the mix as well.
I think much of this is just me overthinking and over worrying. But sometimes I read the extreme stuff here and I get fearful again. Our communication has improved since I posted this so I would say we are in a better place today.
I find myself turned on followed by being completely out of sorts. Her other lovers don’t make me feel threatened like this but this guy is in love with her and she is with him. My wife is aware of my concerns and is working to alleviate them. All-nighters are to be rare as they are the hardest for me to deal with. Other guys need to be in the mix as well.
I think much of this is just me overthinking and over worrying. But sometimes I read the extreme stuff here and I get fearful again. Our communication has improved since I posted this so I would say we are in a better place today.
My Hotwife pictures: viewtopic.php?p=1261423#p1261394
-
- OHW Addict
- Posts: 2131
- Joined: Wed Jun 06, 2007 1:08 am
Re: Being replaced
I am sorry if any of that has been been my content. I am wired quite differently and contrary to most cucks/stags here. I want to experience being her secondary choice. I hate that I want that but I’m learning to embrace it as time passes.4herpleasure89 wrote: ↑Wed Sep 01, 2021 6:10 am
But sometimes I read the extreme stuff here and I get fearful again.
Glad that you two are learning to communicate better and she is taking your feelings into consideration regarding her relationship and activities with her boyfriend.
-
- $2 Ho
- Posts: 944
- Joined: Fri May 18, 2018 10:26 am
Re: Being replaced
Thanks for coming back and updating! Very glad to hear you're in a better place today. I think you're right...if you let yourself overthink it all, it becomes a subject for worry, not for pleasure. You said you don't see any danger of losing your wife...that's the important thing to remember. All of us who share our wives emotionally will naturally worry about this....the key is to keep the communication open, and keeping talking about what bonds you together.4herpleasure89 wrote: ↑Wed Sep 01, 2021 6:10 amThanks for your interest. There have been many ups and downs emotionally for me. I don’t see any danger of losing my wife but i sometimes fear losing her emotionally since like the op, she gets hotter sex from her boyfriend and she craves it.
I find myself turned on followed by being completely out of sorts. Her other lovers don’t make me feel threatened like this but this guy is in love with her and she is with him. My wife is aware of my concerns and is working to alleviate them. All-nighters are to be rare as they are the hardest for me to deal with. Other guys need to be in the mix as well.
I think much of this is just me overthinking and over worrying. But sometimes I read the extreme stuff here and I get fearful again. Our communication has improved since I posted this so I would say we are in a better place today.
Re: Being replaced
Thanks for sharing your story. How are you guys doing?Jezza2543 wrote: ↑Thu Aug 05, 2021 10:04 pmHey. Well there isnt much going on at the moment. I got to the bottom of things between them - as i understand he is with someone else and prefers her over my wife. My wife told me she is/was in love with him and no longer me. She seriously proposed divorce, but has done nothing about it since. We haven't fucked in about 4 months, but actually we are getting on well at the moment, like not fighting and going out for dinner etc so maybe we can salvage the situation. So, who knows…. It might fix itself or it might be a calm before a storm! Im pretty sure that if he had wanted her, she would have left me back at the end of last year. She says she is done with this lifestyle but i think if the right bloke came along we could be right back in there. From my end, i have had offers from other women which i have found helped my self esteem and proves to myself that i also have options too!
From reading you earlier post, do you think you wife may development resentment after realizing you want her to fall in love?
Re: Being replaced
My wife's steady boyfriend is much better than me in bed. He has completely replaced me in our bedroom...and on our couch and in his car and in his bed.
-
- $2 Ho
- Posts: 951
- Joined: Thu Dec 31, 2020 11:58 am
Re: Being replaced
I thought the point of cuckoldry was for the wife to have a Supplement...not (necessarily) a replacement. Not that I'm criticizing or being judgmental; I'm just wondering, at the end of the day, what does the (cuckold) husband get out of this? A divorce settlement, wherein most of the family/household assets go to her, and he ends up (as one poster put it) a dingy studio apartment, stripped of his wife, his home, his assets? Hope he is still financially secure to retire one day, the way most Americans are not. SHEESH! I realize it may be an unbelievable turn-on for some; as some of the posters have indicated, but I wonder at what point, fantasy interferes, and then supersedes, real life with some unknown and possibly very unpleasant consequences for the husband. (Full disclosure: I just finished my yearly financial review with my accountant, so that is perhaps where my head is at right now.)
-
- OHW Addict
- Posts: 2131
- Joined: Wed Jun 06, 2007 1:08 am
Re: Being replaced
LawyerWouldbeCuckold wrote: ↑Sat Nov 27, 2021 9:42 amI thought the point of cuckoldry was for the wife to have a Supplement...not (necessarily) a replacement. Not that I'm criticizing or being judgmental; I'm just wondering, at the end of the day, what does the (cuckold) husband get out of this? A divorce settlement, wherein most of the family/household assets go to her, and he ends up (as one poster put it) a dingy studio apartment, stripped of his wife, his home, his assets? Hope he is still financially secure to retire one day, the way most Americans are not. SHEESH! I realize it may be an unbelievable turn-on for some; as some of the posters have indicated, but I wonder at what point, fantasy interferes, and then supersedes, real life with some unknown and possibly very unpleasant consequences for the husband. (Full disclosure: I just finished my yearly financial review with my accountant, so that is perhaps where my head is at right now.)
You raise some valid questions but as a stag turned cuck, I’d like to speak for myself and my “definitions” of both styles.
When I was a stag, her lovers were all supplements to out sex life. We both enjoyed it and while I received a tad less sex; I still had her full time for myself.
After a few years we both thought a transition would be good, especially since I craved to see more intensity and she wanted to give herself more to the other man. We were both on the same page.
We both wanted her to develop a deeper connection sexually as well as emotionally with her lover ( which resulted in him actually becoming her boyfriend) and along with this, both her and I agreed that we’d turn out heat down so that she could focus on him.
I feel that cuckolding is once it becomes more about her. When you can put yourself aside so that she can enjoy belonging to another man without losing you. You simply become deprioritized but still get to witness and enjoy what you like most, and that is seeing your gf or wife giving herself to another man.
As long as the couple is strong and the cuck is capable of falling back, while the wife is able to love and be with another man without dropping the cuck; all should be swell.
I know it sounds easier in writing but I believe that it is possible and believe there are some men capable of seeing the love of their life physically belonging to another man as well as letting her give herself emotionally to a man who takes priority over you.
-
- $2 Ho
- Posts: 951
- Joined: Thu Dec 31, 2020 11:58 am
Re: Being replaced
if it works for you, then it works for you; but I guess my next question is....from her standpoint- she physically belongs to him; emotionally he takes a higher priority than you do....what exactly, to her, is the upside/benefit of her keeping you in her life? Unless I"m missing something, it seems that have manuvered (sp?) yourself into a position to where you are (almost) superfluous.ucaneffher wrote: ↑Sun Dec 05, 2021 1:50 pmLawyerWouldbeCuckold wrote: ↑Sat Nov 27, 2021 9:42 amI thought the point of cuckoldry was for the wife to have a Supplement...not (necessarily) a replacement. Not that I'm criticizing or being judgmental; I'm just wondering, at the end of the day, what does the (cuckold) husband get out of this? A divorce settlement, wherein most of the family/household assets go to her, and he ends up (as one poster put it) a dingy studio apartment, stripped of his wife, his home, his assets? Hope he is still financially secure to retire one day, the way most Americans are not. SHEESH! I realize it may be an unbelievable turn-on for some; as some of the posters have indicated, but I wonder at what point, fantasy interferes, and then supersedes, real life with some unknown and possibly very unpleasant consequences for the husband. (Full disclosure: I just finished my yearly financial review with my accountant, so that is perhaps where my head is at right now.)
You raise some valid questions but as a stag turned cuck, I’d like to speak for myself and my “definitions” of both styles.
When I was a stag, her lovers were all supplements to out sex life. We both enjoyed it and while I received a tad less sex; I still had her full time for myself.
After a few years we both thought a transition would be good, especially since I craved to see more intensity and she wanted to give herself more to the other man. We were both on the same page.
We both wanted her to develop a deeper connection sexually as well as emotionally with her lover ( which resulted in him actually becoming her boyfriend) and along with this, both her and I agreed that we’d turn out heat down so that she could focus on him.
I feel that cuckolding is once it becomes more about her. When you can put yourself aside so that she can enjoy belonging to another man without losing you. You simply become deprioritized but still get to witness and enjoy what you like most, and that is seeing your gf or wife giving herself to another man.
As long as the couple is strong and the cuck is capable of falling back, while the wife is able to love and be with another man without dropping the cuck; all should be swell.
I know it sounds easier in writing but I believe that it is possible and believe there are some men capable of seeing the love of their life physically belonging to another man as well as letting her give herself emotionally to a man who takes priority over you.
-
- OHW Addict
- Posts: 2131
- Joined: Wed Jun 06, 2007 1:08 am
Re: Being replaced
Excellent question… I don’t have much of an answer other than having two men. Willing to share her. One has her more than the other.
- 4herpleasure89
- OHW Addict
- Posts: 2003
- Joined: Wed Feb 19, 2014 10:41 am
- Location: Southeast Florida
Re: Being replaced
ucaneffher Sort of answered this question but here is my view. A wife benifits in many ways, two men who love her exclusively is a big one. Emotional financial security might be another.
The husband is her life partner, perhaps the father of her children and accepts her unconditionally. The lover brings thrill and excitement but in our case lacks qualities that would make for a great husband while killing it between the sheets. Myself I have never struggled attracting women and feel confident in my ability to still. My wife says the same thing. But I love giving everything to her including a safe fulfilling sex life with other men, even if that area I’m deprioritized some.
ucaneffher‘s situation is a bit more extreme to me and can be hazardous if it goes to far. It is also his perspective and I often find quite different from the wife’s.
The husband is her life partner, perhaps the father of her children and accepts her unconditionally. The lover brings thrill and excitement but in our case lacks qualities that would make for a great husband while killing it between the sheets. Myself I have never struggled attracting women and feel confident in my ability to still. My wife says the same thing. But I love giving everything to her including a safe fulfilling sex life with other men, even if that area I’m deprioritized some.
ucaneffher‘s situation is a bit more extreme to me and can be hazardous if it goes to far. It is also his perspective and I often find quite different from the wife’s.
My Hotwife pictures: viewtopic.php?p=1261423#p1261394
-
- $2 Ho
- Posts: 944
- Joined: Fri May 18, 2018 10:26 am
Re: Being replaced
A perfect explanation of our situation.4herpleasure89 wrote: ↑Tue Dec 07, 2021 6:15 am.....The husband is her life partner, perhaps the father of her children and accepts her unconditionally. The lover brings thrill and excitement but in our case lacks qualities that would make for a great husband while killing it between the sheets....
Re: Being replaced
Being replaced can happen in every marriage. Everybody knows.
I encouraged my wife not to hide her inner feelings because of the natural background of it. MHO.
Countless times he penetrated her only with his unprotected glans till she couldn't bear it anymore.
She took the initiative to put his huge and unprotected cock into her pussy.
She confessed why: "I'm fallen in love with him."
I never felt replaced. On the contrary, I was happy for her.
It brought us closer to each other as ever, talking about it, exchanging our fantasies about what could happen more.
Like a divorce or having her live with him.
"Never in my life", she said.
"To have a husband who can even accept me loving another man, seems to me an exception.
Being able to love two men at the same time, is a treasure I don't want to loose. Even when better sex than with him is unthinkable.
I'm more than satisfied with the sex you and I have. And you can always watch us.
So why damaging a strong bond and marriage?
The biggest mistake I could ever make. You are my most important man and that will stay forever."
I encouraged my wife not to hide her inner feelings because of the natural background of it. MHO.
My wife fell in love to another man because of the beautiful and uncommon sex they had.Troilusand wrote:
We've reached a good plateau where he is her lover in every sense of the word, while she and I remain a loving, supporting, committed married couple. We have discussed having her live with him on and off, but for various reasons this can't happen right now - if it could, I'm sure we'd be doing that.
Countless times he penetrated her only with his unprotected glans till she couldn't bear it anymore.
She took the initiative to put his huge and unprotected cock into her pussy.
She confessed why: "I'm fallen in love with him."
I never felt replaced. On the contrary, I was happy for her.
It brought us closer to each other as ever, talking about it, exchanging our fantasies about what could happen more.
Like a divorce or having her live with him.
"Never in my life", she said.
"To have a husband who can even accept me loving another man, seems to me an exception.
Being able to love two men at the same time, is a treasure I don't want to loose. Even when better sex than with him is unthinkable.
I'm more than satisfied with the sex you and I have. And you can always watch us.
So why damaging a strong bond and marriage?
The biggest mistake I could ever make. You are my most important man and that will stay forever."
Re: Being replaced
I wonder if Jezza is still around and would like to give us all an update? This has been a fascinating story.
-
- Virgin
- Posts: 47
- Joined: Thu May 05, 2022 11:02 am
Re: Being replaced
Isn't the fear of being replaced by a superior lover part of the allure of cuckolding? The cuck sure tries a LOT harder when he's faced with a superior male figure in his wife's life.
-
- Player
- Posts: 284
- Joined: Sun Aug 01, 2021 1:35 pm
- Location: Hampshire UK
Re: Being replaced
For me part of the relief is for the bull to replace me. For another man to take responsibility for satisfying her pussy. To know I’m beta and ‘replaced’ as her lover doesn’t mean I’m not relevant to her life. I’m the husband. I’m just not the primary male in her bed.
Re: Being replaced
Jezza is still around, last I remember he was pussy free after his wife's affair ended, not something I would enjoy in the least.
-
- OHW Addict
- Posts: 2732
- Joined: Thu Dec 16, 2021 12:54 am
- Location: UK - Southport (Churchtown)
Re: Being replaced
He posted on another thread within the last week or two
**********************
My account of our first time, what happened afterwards and when my marriage was in trouble - link below.
Thank you for any who comment
viewtopic.php?t=65641
My account of our first time, what happened afterwards and when my marriage was in trouble - link below.
Thank you for any who comment
viewtopic.php?t=65641
Re: Being replaced
husband, i.e. a babysitter and an ATM?AgegapCuck wrote: ↑Thu May 12, 2022 11:10 amFor me part of the relief is for the bull to replace me. For another man to take responsibility for satisfying her pussy. To know I’m beta and ‘replaced’ as her lover doesn’t mean I’m not relevant to her life. I’m the husband. I’m just not the primary male in her bed.
-
- Player
- Posts: 284
- Joined: Sun Aug 01, 2021 1:35 pm
- Location: Hampshire UK
Re: Being replaced
You really do have a churlish outlook. You can’t babysit your own kids. They are both of our responsibility and what’s wrong with her wanting to raise them with me in a shared family?Tomek001 wrote: ↑Fri May 13, 2022 10:19 amhusband, i.e. a babysitter and an ATM?AgegapCuck wrote: ↑Thu May 12, 2022 11:10 amFor me part of the relief is for the bull to replace me. For another man to take responsibility for satisfying her pussy. To know I’m beta and ‘replaced’ as her lover doesn’t mean I’m not relevant to her life. I’m the husband. I’m just not the primary male in her bed.
Also I am no more her atm than she is my cook. We share. It’s a partnership. The only exception is in bed where she prefers to be ridden by her lover. That’s every week or so. The other 95% of the time she is in bed cuddling me. I’m lucky to have her.
-
- OHW Addict
- Posts: 2732
- Joined: Thu Dec 16, 2021 12:54 am
- Location: UK - Southport (Churchtown)
Re: Being replaced
I'm not even sure that's entirely true in all cases, the cuck can be more than happy to concede the primary role completely to the bull, first of all for far less penetrative sex, but in some cases that can also lead to far less of all types of other sex too, if the bull demands it of his submissive female. There can be an excitement rather than fear of being replaced, and the cuck wishing for it not trying to stop or delay it.Showoffcouple wrote: ↑Thu May 12, 2022 10:26 amIsn't the fear of being replaced by a superior lover part of the allure of cuckolding? The cuck sure tries a LOT harder when he's faced with a superior male figure in his wife's life.
**********************
My account of our first time, what happened afterwards and when my marriage was in trouble - link below.
Thank you for any who comment
viewtopic.php?t=65641
My account of our first time, what happened afterwards and when my marriage was in trouble - link below.
Thank you for any who comment
viewtopic.php?t=65641
Re: Being replaced
Just want to say…. I fully support this way of thinking…. Why would everything have to be a zero sum gain and be ‘equal’ to work? Clearly it doesn’t and it doesn’t have to mean one is being taken advantage of if they live such an arraignment.AgegapCuck wrote: ↑Fri May 13, 2022 10:35 amYou really do have a churlish outlook. You can’t babysit your own kids. They are both of our responsibility and what’s wrong with her wanting to raise them with me in a shared family?Tomek001 wrote: ↑Fri May 13, 2022 10:19 amhusband, i.e. a babysitter and an ATM?AgegapCuck wrote: ↑Thu May 12, 2022 11:10 amFor me part of the relief is for the bull to replace me. For another man to take responsibility for satisfying her pussy. To know I’m beta and ‘replaced’ as her lover doesn’t mean I’m not relevant to her life. I’m the husband. I’m just not the primary male in her bed.
Also I am no more her atm than she is my cook. We share. It’s a partnership. The only exception is in bed where she prefers to be ridden by her lover. That’s every week or so. The other 95% of the time she is in bed cuddling me. I’m lucky to have her.
Whatever works in one’s relationship, the rest be damned.
-
- $2 Ho
- Posts: 944
- Joined: Fri May 18, 2018 10:26 am
Re: Being replaced
Absolutely right on! This is exactly the relationship my wife and I have too. It's wonderful and works for us both.AgegapCuck wrote: ↑Fri May 13, 2022 10:35 am.....Also I am no more her atm than she is my cook. We share. It’s a partnership. The only exception is in bed where she prefers to be ridden by her lover. That’s every week or so. The other 95% of the time she is in bed cuddling me. I’m lucky to have her.
Re: Being replaced
Plus one! A celibate marriage would suck IF that’s not what you wanted. Our marriage doesn’t include sex, and we’re both happy this way.pixwellguy wrote: ↑Sun May 15, 2022 1:27 pmAbsolutely right on! This is exactly the relationship my wife and I have too. It's wonderful and works for us both.AgegapCuck wrote: ↑Fri May 13, 2022 10:35 am.....Also I am no more her atm than she is my cook. We share. It’s a partnership. The only exception is in bed where she prefers to be ridden by her lover. That’s every week or so. The other 95% of the time she is in bed cuddling me. I’m lucky to have her.
Re: Being replaced
Yep still about, nothing exciting to update on my story im afraid - no more cuckolding, and not really getting on very well with her ATM for other reasons - Ill stick about and contribute to others posts!
Re: Being replaced
That’s sad. Do you think it all comes down to the cuckolding in the end though?