Hotwife going out alone/why is it too difficult for me?

[nudeinnola]

I do not know how many times I have said this... but I need to stop reading this stuff at work... I have a meeting and can not focus.

[mrs_reese]

I am home finally! Yah!! I missed being home. Robert or shall I say my other husband spoiled me. Not once did he ask for me to leave my husband. He was on his best behavior. At times he would ask me if I was serious or play acting. It was so different. My hubby completely understands me and my actions/role playing. Robert on the other hand had a difficult tme wondering when I was serious and when I was playing. But one thing he did wonderfully was to respect our boundaries.

I think that I am ready for more time and love with Robert. When hubby comes home from work, I will tell him. I want to be Robert's wife also. I want to make time each month when my child is with her father to spend time as Robert's real life non legal wife. This is what I want. This is what I will have in my life. Hubby absolutely loved being my boyfriend. He had it made with me. I fucked him a few times over the past 4 days. It was uninhibited and carefree. He told me that he masterbated all the time thinking about the fact that I acted as Roberts wife. I am hoping that 4 to 6 nights a month we can settle on this arrangement. In between the time that I am not acting as Robs wife, I will not spend time with him. All my free time away from Robert will be shared with hubby and my child. I believe that this arrangement will make all of us happy.
Robert's world doesnt interact with hubby and my world, so this should be fun!

I did cuck Robert a few times with Hubby as my lover. Robert actually loved licking me like hubby does after being away.
The role reversals were really different. I was very challenging for me to act out the way I did over the past 4 days.
I had so much fun being in control! Acting as Robert's wife only allowed me to feel more love for him. Hubby was lonely and in agony a few times when I phoned him and told him that I cant see him when he requested because I had to take care of my husband who was actually Robert on that night!
As I said before, the role reversals were challenging for everyone I believe!

[BallSpanking]

It sounds very nice for you, Ms Reese, but I wonder if that means added obligations to you as wife to TWO men?
Maybe you can take a little time-out just for you and your new boy-toy, Bard, can have some uninhibited fun sex...

[tanda]

This is my first post ever, even though I am a very long time lurker, going back to the old forum before it was abandoned. I have been in a similar situation, and this whole scene gives me a bad bad feeling for Mr. Reese. I have been at the place where you are sick about what your wife is doing and you convince yourself (with dick in hand) that this is what you want. I would just encourage Mr. Reese to seriously evaluate how he really feels about this situation and to trust his instincts. Have a serious talk with yourself when you don't have an erection. I have read your feelings of loneliness and anger/jealousy and your admirable ability to discount your feelings and turn them around into lust. However, the latest developments in your story, based on my own personal experience, give me concern about you and your relationship. I was in a very similar situation once, and after two years of "playing", that wife eventually left me for her lover. Back then, I rationalized that everything was our "game", even though I knew in my heart that I had lost control.

If I'm out of bounds, please accept my apologies. However, for me, your story (while captivating as all hell) has gone from being a weekly wankfest to something that makes me sad and anxious when I read it. I wish you the best.

[reese]

Tanda...a very heart-felt thank-you for posting your feelings. I sincerely appreciate your honesty.

I want to talk about a few issues. My thread has gone from one where I was posting for opinions and reactions to some hotwife situations that my wife and I were encountering to an almost poly-relationship with Robert.
I try NOT to act like a "baby" and post some of my serious feelings about my wife and Robert all the time. Facing reality, I am the one who pushed her into this situation with Robert. She has constantly asked that WE both slow down and at times we have....only to go back full force! But I want to admit to everyone that I miss the hotwife days where my wife would find men...flirt with men....and seduce men for fun...nothing was serious and her hot wife play was never rehearsed.
My wife's latest request was an attempt to make me go crazy with the mental torture that I seek when she plays hotwife.
Believe me when I write that IT DID! We talked for hours last night about our dreams and goals for the future and about introducing Robert in our lives as her live in lover from month to month. I am not a dummy...I know that Robert wants my wife to be his own.....he is playing by our rules...and I find it challenging that he is acting as my wife's make believe husband when they are together. Will he stay the course? I am not sure! WIll my wife lose a part of her love for me and direct it to Robert? Will my wife leave me one day.....because I pushed her into this lifestyle? Will Robert convince her to eventually leave me one day? Will he attempt her to slowly wean me from her sex....and take it all for himself?

These are the questions that we discussed. Last night, my wife asked that we have the heart to heart talk. SHe is scared!

[reese]

She told me how enjoyable it was living with Robert as his wife. How sexy and erotic it is for her...to openly love another man. But..................crying, my wife told me that no matter how much she tries to play in my world of make believe and fantasy turned reality...turning on and off again her love for her lover or her husband.....that this hotwife situation is stressing her out! I never thought for a moment how difficult it must be to leave one home and move into her lovers home...to change lifestyles...to leave behind her child with her father...to live 2 lives basically!
Taking vacation time away is one thing...sneaking off and spending the night with her lover is another thing...but living with a man for 3 or 4 days..and moving back to HOME again.....????
Yesterday my wife posted in this thread how she wants to be Robert's wife as well as mine. Can I be honest with all of you reading this post about something? If you read between the lines, this is something that my wife will do from time to time to tease me..to sexually torment me! I love when she acts this way! She loves the power of seducing me like that!
Jumping here.......this past week, I didnt mention that I DID spend time with L. It was wild and fun. I have know that L has a deep feelings for me..and I stay away from her only because I respect my marriage....I do not want to cause any heartache for my wife. SHe is very jealous of L...but she also loves L. But my wife was an absolute "wreck when I spent time with L.....texting me asking if I will NOT have sex with her...giving me her CODE word to STOP! L was upset and disappointed....walking away calling my wife and I obsessed with each other and sexual freaks!
My wife and I along with Robert are encountering life situations that are bending the rules of relationships and marriage.

[reese]

I am not sure what is going to happen from this point in our lives. My wife is asleep....and very confused. She feels that WE both have lost a grip on our marriage.....I agree.
So Tanda, thank-you for your insight. We are one step ahead of you. We need to determine what is best for our marriage.
I woke up last night and put myself in my wife's shoes....I can not imagine how difficult it must be to play make believe all the time! I promise to keep all of you posted on our decisions.

Tonight....my wife and I are visiting a very popular club in the city. She wants to meet Brad. I will be there with her...but watching from a distance like I use to do. She will put on a show for me.....her goal is to go back to the early hotwife days...of flirting and teasing. She will do nothing with Brad other than maybe dance with him....and maybe kiss him.

I am sure that tonight will be fun to go back to the simplier days of hotwife play.
I do not want to ever lose my wife...and I appreciate her love for me more than words can explain.
I wonder if I have pushed too far!
I wonder if one day my wife will leave me...only because I pushed her too far beyond human limitations.
I wonder if I am being wrecklessly selfish in my quest for the most intense orgasm ever!
My wife's love for me...my marriage is more important that my selfish sexual desires.

THANKS FOR LISTENING EVERYONE!

[Softail]

Reese,
I'm "Standing in the Gap" for you and Mrs.
As much as I love reading about your exploits, maybe it's time for a LONG break from this. Readjust your sights and focus on your marriage. Remember "Failing to plan is planning to fail".
Noone here will fault you for bowing-out for awhile, or even permanently. You guys have inspired us all.
You are THE BEST!
Agape'
Softail

[BallSpanking]

Thank you Mr Reese for posting such an honest insightful assessment of the effect of a long-term involvement by Ms Reese with Robert. It is cautionary, and illuminating.

Many HW couples stay clear of long-term involvements
precisely because of his type of challenges. In some cases the couple might discontinue the activity, in others it can actually contribute to a break-up (if communication isn't good), and yet in other cases, people find that they can live, thrive, and grow in a poly-amorous relationship.
For those in these last, definitions of fidelity, love, and growth undergo profound revaluation. Difficult.

I think Mr Reese, that, try though she might, Ms Reese is in-love with Robert, and that is why she finds this stressful. It is very hard for her to hold back from loving Robert, because you ask her to/because she wants to, because you encourage her to go out and experiment with other men.

HotWifing means the ultimate trust, ultimate freedom to your wife, that she has your support for her growth..., the hard part is, that this inevitably means letting-go of her, or at least a part of her, so she will know she is free to grow and explore another love, and still the two of you remain strong.

One time you wrote that if this freedom given to Ms Reese ever led to her falling in love with another man, that you would do everything within your abilities to keep her, but that her happiness is ultimately more important to you, and you would support her decisions, whatever they might be.

The sad thing is, though, it need not pull you apart, if you are all on the same page as to your involvements.

Ultimately, if this arrangement should prove unworkable, I hope there is still room for Ms Reese to be a HW, seeing guys like Brad, precisely as you suggested, seducing them, enjoying them, their youth, their bodies, their sex, then moving-on.

Sorry to be long winded, Mr Reese, just had some time to put down some thoughts.
We love and support you both.

[Iris777]

While in most cases, taking decisive action is the way to accomplish what you want, in this case perhaps no action at all is the best. Make absolutely no hard and fast decisions. Allow things to settle down, shake out, calm. These are some pretty intense and risky steps that you are both considering. What might seem like a great idea during the height of everyones passions may not hold up well to calm and measured reasoning. And it might be even better!

Leaving the whole thing alone for a little while, no matter what external pressures come to bear, may allow you both the perspective you need. If Robert can't handle the fact that you need to be left to the two of you to work these things out, then he is not the man for this arrangement.

[BallSpanking]

I'll say it again...,

"Perhaps if Robert met L, he wouldn't be so demanding of Ms Reese's time..., and body..."

[mrs_reese]

Thanks again! Everyone! It really helps when we can take advice from all of our friends.

Hubby and I went out Saturday night.
It was so refreshing, no complications, no worries! I met Brad and some of his friends. Hubby was there also. So many times I would excuse myself to go the bathroom and walk past hubby. I would look at him with hungry eyes, our silent communication was turning me on so much. Later that night, we would be wild and innocent with hotwife sex.
Brad and I played a little. Making out and dancing. He doesnt rush me. I love that. I told him that I met up him for a short time only, that I had to be back home to hang out with hubby.
We both will take our time with Robert. Yes, I do love him and that scares both hubby and I. We are trying to sort out all of this. Hubby is freaked out b/c he has never had to really share me. I am freaked out b/c I do not want to lose my perfect life and the man that I love more than anything in the world. Things have changed since I feel in love with Robert.
It's just so different. I do not know how to love 2 men. I am not sure if I can do that. I will give this some time.
One thing that helps me understand all of this is that I dont miss robert like I miss my hubby when I am away from him.
I miss his sex, I miss his touch and his silly personality, but MISSING him like I miss hubby/ I dont!
That makes me wonder why am I putting myself though all of this?
Brad is easy. Brad is innocent and fun. Robert is complicated.

[mrs_reese]

Just when I thought I was strong, Robert asked me to come over for a late lunch. I called hubby and of course he said to go for it because it makes me happy. This is the Robert I miss. Sex and fun. I want him right now! I want to be bad and make him cum for me. Bye for now. I want to be bad!

[aemn711]

Just when I thought I was strong, Robert asked me to come over for a late lunch. I called hubby and of course he said to go for it because it makes me happy. This is the Robert I miss. Sex and fun. I want him right now! I want to be bad and make him cum for me. Bye for now. I want to be bad!

Oh Mrs R - I don't see how you can keep this pace up - One question is how does this afternoon compare with Brad? I suspect it would be more of a turn on and more intense. You gotta love Mr. R for loving you so much he's letting you enjoy Robert with all that is going on for him and you emotionally.

[BallSpanking]

Dear Ms Reese,

Go have fun, definitely, have sex with Robert, make love to him, give him the very sweetest attention you can give, and love him.
You are correct, you DON'T know if you can love two men at the same time, but you are finding out, and I think that you will eventually find a workable balance between the men in your life (assuming that each man is not overly demanding of your time, and can be content with the love you give him).

Having said that, I also agree with Mr Reese, that it would be good for you (if you want it) to return to a lighter form of cuckolding/HotWifing, by dating guys like Brad, so you can enjoy them, have some lovely new sex, and then come home to your husbands to make love.
In fact, I was thinking that perhaps the dynamics between the three of you could really benefit from having some MFM's together. I think perhaps that would reduce the apprehension your men have over losing your love, if they could see you and experience you making love with both of them at the same time.

What do you think?

[zhershey1082]

There you go Reese. She called you before going to have lunch with Robert. You are still in the driver's seat, but we worry about you sometimes. If you had been married say 15-20 years, I would not worry as much. However, you and the Mrs R have only been married four years. Now that she has two loves in her life, the least little flare up in your marriage could be the trigger for her to run to her lover. Be careful guy.

I certainly hope you would not entertain spending time with L whenever Mrs R wants to spend time with Robert. I think she is proposing 4-6 days/month. This could be one of those triggers that will endanger your marriage.

Question: I am estimating you are about 40-42 years of age. When are you going to slow down?

[Aynsley]

Dear Mrs. Reese,

First, thank you for sharing your ongoing saga. The bravery you two display
is amazing.

I just wanted to share the HW-Hubby viewpoint (at least mine )...

IRIS has a regular FB, and possibly another one in the making, however,
since he's out-of-town, she's still looking for a #3. Both of us would feel better
not having just 'one main FB', as I think Robert represents to you
(and I realize, Robert's more than a FB).

And I 'get' what you're exploring with Robert; the challenge, the rewards,
the 'risk' in having someone you know so well be a FB....
...but another aspect that such a pursuit represents is the cancelling of other pursuits
(hey...we only have so much time in a day)
...such as 'Brad' or guys like him.

I LIKE IT when Iris is seeking 'new guys'...as I enjoy that other...MANY...
'guys' appreciate my sexy wife as much as I do.
This 'like' is but one of many thrills with HW-ing, and it's not inconsequential.

Now, would I frown upon Iris blowing of a date with a 'new guy', so she
could spend time with her main FB???....'No'.....'cause if she's requesting that,
it MUST be something that's she's craving, wanting, desiring, and another
part of HW-ing is watching the delight of our wives.

On the other hand, if fixation with the main FB prevented 'other 'guys' from
'playing', I would be disappointed.
I can see where the 'challenge' that someone like Robert
presents to Mr. R. could be 'fun'....but I can also see where it would be
tiring (and not fun). And further, if that meant that he could not see his
sexy wife being pursued by other guys...I can see where that would lessen
his pleasure.

I guess what I'm saying...I'm not sure Robert, at his current 'position'
in your marriage/relationship, allows for other 'playing' (with other guys)
by you. For me, that would be a disappointment...but
that's JUST me.

[Irwinhill]

zhershey1082 wrote:

Now that she has two loves in her life, the least little flare up in your marriage could be the trigger for her to run to her lover.

Seems to me that this depends entirely on the nature of the woman. If my wife loved someone like Robert--loved him a lot--that love would never be an excuse for her to run to him if she had a problem with me.

Perhaps some women and some men would respond to the trigger that you describe. But plenty of others have values that don't permit that kind of behavior.

Maybe I'm missing something. Are there examples in the Reeses' story that support the notion that Mrs. Reese might treat Mr. Reese in such a thoughtless and cruel manner? I haven't seen any evidence like that, have you?

IH
P.S. While there are plenty of reasons for reading this thread, the one most important to me is using the characters and actions to reflect on my own marriage. I ask myself: Is there a man on this planet so romantic, so intelligent, so handsome, so good in bed, so wealthy that he would cause my wife to abuse me? I believe I know how the protagonist in this thread would answer that question. And I know for sure how I would answer.

[mrs_reese]

Hi everyone
We are ok and thanks guys, I feel everyones concern and care. I luv you all!

One thing I want to comment on, I have a rule and agreement with hubby that has been honored and never broken.
I will never leave to visit a lover if we are in a disagreement or argument. I will never leave him to go to the better situation. One of our greatest concerns was when we have our bad days, it would be easy to leave hubby home and seek comfort and sex with my lover, but I wont go anywhere! It would be too easy to do that. I find it very difficult to act like a hotwife when we argue. I want to emphasize that I never have the urge to play when we are not getting along.
About Robert yesterday. We didnt have sex. But I did give him oral sex in his office again.
I want him in my life, hubby is supportive, but I am not sure how to do it!
Hubby will always come first.
IH, again, what a nice post, you can read between the lines, I would never disrespect my hubby.
I am his slave!

[reese]

I came home from a short non-busy day. My wife is baking a traditional apple pie! Go figure! A hotwife baking a pie! LOL!
WE are doing well.............a lot of stuff has been going on in our lives....
Robert???? It's a day to day thing! My wife and I will write stuff at times, but there are so many moments that go unwritten. I do want to share something with all of you though! Right now my wife is feeling sexy. Her daughter is on a field trip with school. The heat is turned on to a higher setting. She is dressed in thongs.....black, high-heels and black hose, garter straps, an apron over her.........hair is pulled back, lipstick is perfectly placed upon her lips....nails and sexy toes painted, make-up on.....and she is baking a pie! A few minutes ago after I arrived home, she asked that I insert a finger into her pussy...OMG...wet..sticky and sweet. I licked it...and she smiled at me and instructed me to be patient, she had a pie to back as promised to her daughter. THIS IS WHAT I LIVE FOR! How many wives would do that for their husbands? Marriage isnt normal for hotwife couples...the intensity doesnt end! The wild imaginations...the fascinating sex play...the teasing ...the game playing..the mental foreplay! Having Robert in her life...sharing her love with him is killing me at times...but I dont want to give it up and go back to a boring marriage where sex happens a few times a month!
WE are really working at this...........my wife doesnt want to let go of Robert....but it is complicated. I am not a super human being...sharing her love is the hardest thing that I have ever done in terms of being unselfish.
But my desire for her gains intensity more every day! Having a hotwife like my wife is the greatest gift a man could ever receive.

Zhershey, you are correct about my age. Good assumption. But why slow down? I am living the life! I am responsible..married father.....business leader....and having fun! Thanks for your comments though!
I can speak on behalf of my wife and inform everyone reading our thread, we feel so close to you!
THANKS!

[reese]

Aynsley and Iris, your posts are so insightful..listening to another hotwife couple is great for us!
aemn, your are also correct...mrs R missed the excitement of a new conquest btw!

[Iris777]

Thanks Reese, but don't post anymore about baking in lingerie - Aynsley might expect me to cook.

Does eating an apple in the living room with no panties on count?

[reese]

I forgot to eat the apple pie a few days ago Iris!

Things have been quiet for a few days. We have family time all weekend. No playing. Our thread will be inactive for a few days. But I want to report something that we have discussed.

Robert has been patient and very understanding. Non demanding. My wife wants him more when he is patient. I know her weakness. Sunday night, WE plan on having Robert over, she is hot for a mmf with him. We have not been together(all of us) for a while now. I believe Robert and I will be good with this. I am very curious to see the dynamics b/w my wife and Robert. My wife told me that she wants to suck me off with Robert holding my cock. She wants to play with the power exchange b/w him and I ! I am intrigued by all of this and will be curious how this will play itself out Sunday night.
Needless to say, it will be very HOT to watch her make love to him...watching her eyes look into his as she whispers "I love you to him".
With what I know about my wife, she becomes very intense and emotional as her lover is driving his cock inside her about to cum....I havent witnessed that in a while, I cant WAIT to watch all of that again!

Take care everyone.

[Aynsley]

Needless to say, it will be very HOT to watch her make love to him...watching her eyes look into his as she whispers "I love you to him".
With what I know about my wife, she becomes very intense and emotional as her lover is driving his cock inside her about to cum....I havent witnessed that in a while, I cant WAIT to watch all of that again!

Reese...YES!...the heart pounds very hard when one watches the gorgeous,
naked wife smile, groan, and giggle, as she looks up into the eyes of her lover,
with immense satisfaction while holding her lover's face between her hands,
as she's rocking to an imminent orgasm.

Have Fun!!

[aemn711]

...... My wife told me that she wants to suck me off with Robert holding my cock. She wants to play with the power exchange b/w him and I ! I am intrigued by all of this and will be curious how this will play itself out Sunday night.......

I like to speculate as to what will happen but I think Mrs. R is likely to force Robert to deep throat Mr Rs cock as an expression of her power and control over the situation. I predict he will gladly do anything Mrs R asks. Could be very hot for her as well.

Aemn