Her Plan to Dip Toe in Hotwife Water

[CuriousUK]

You’re a very patient man my friend, and I’m sure that patience will be rewarded in due course

[afagehi7]

SF, you simply must have cameras installed at your house.

I completely agree and without wifes knowledge!!!!

Even outside just to monitor the coming and going.

I agree, why lie and risk it when she knows you would be super happy for her to fuck a guy. Doesn't make any sense.

[rooster444]

I'd be careful giving a lawyer the green light...throwing bait in the water when there are sharks around, you might lose a howwife.

[BallSpanking]

SF, you simply must have cameras installed at your house.

I completely agree and without wifes knowledge!!!!

Unfortunately, that train 'done left the station'. It's very doubtful SW would consent to them again, and installing secretly is bad form.

[DoneThat]

Does she want to be your hotwife?, or someone else’s wife?

I may be wrong, but it seems she only wants to fuck someone who has the means to keep her in the lifestyle she’s accustomed to.

She’s not Hotwife material, she is disrespecting you as if she isn’t in love with you - maybe she’s in love with the wealth you provide, and not you.

Best wishes to you, I hope I’m wrong.

[rncinmd]

SF,

dont want to pile on, but her most recent excursion appears to be concerning.

hope you get more clarity on what her end state is. The journey is something for both of you to enjoy. Hope it works out in the end for you.

[il2sw]

I want to believe that she’s not being purposely deceitful, but instead she needs privacy and independence to start (or resume) being a hotwife. My wife told me that if I wanted her to be a hotwife, she needed to feel more independent. She told me “I have to be more ‘me’ and less ‘us’.” She asked me not to monitor who she texted with, etc. I trusted her and in the end it worked perfectly. At the beginning she would go on dates and I would not really know if it was a business dinner or a date. Then, she started telling me more. Eventually, she found a boyfriend and when she was having sex weekly with him she told me “this is fun and even though I can fuck other men and I enjoy it a lot, I only love you.”

The fact that she sent you those pics in lingerie makes me think that she wants to get caught or give you a hint. If she would’ve been really trying to keep her naughty adventure a secret, she would’ve not taken a risk by doing something that was completely out of the ordinary.

I know that by now she should have no reason not to tell you. She knows you want her to fuck other men. But perhaps you can try to make her more comfortable with sharing by telling her that you hope she takes advantage of the independence that she likes to have when you’re away, possibly meeting men, and even having dates, but that you’d like her to tell you something about it so that it becomes a shared naughty secret you both have or something like that.

[slenderfish]

SF, you simply must have cameras installed at your house.

I completely agree and without wifes knowledge!!!!

Unfortunately, that train 'done left the station'. It's very doubtful SW would consent to them again, and installing secretly is bad form.

Not gonna do any secret camera but I did acquire a ring doorbell last year at Christmas (Santa's gift to the house). Over the summer, SW asked why I hadn't yet installed the doorbell. Note the old one has not worked for many years. Perhaps I will finally install the doorbell!

[slenderfish]

Does she want to be your hotwife?, or someone else’s wife?

I may be wrong, but it seems she only wants to fuck someone who has the means to keep her in the lifestyle she’s accustomed to.

She’s not Hotwife material, she is disrespecting you as if she isn’t in love with you - maybe she’s in love with the wealth you provide, and not you.

Best wishes to you, I hope I’m wrong.

She is a complex person, I think she ultimately does not really know herself. She does unexpected things when she's had a few glasses of wine.

[slenderfish]

I did review all the comments and suggestions, observations, etc. There are little signs when your lover has moved interest to someone else (certainly in our case). She has been acting a bit like she was when she was being secretive with Mr. B. to some degree. Or that's what I've decided. So I started testing the little things that are subtle and perhaps she is not even aware :

- She has been going into the other room when changing clothes, keeping her nakedness to herself

- Also with showering and after the shower making sure to cover up right away

- Extra possessive of her phone (lest a text message notification pop up unexpectedly even when in locked mode)

- Less patience with me

- Less natural touching and physical stuff like that

- Subtly turning away during the night when I place my hand on her hip or stomach ("it's too hot" etc.)

- Excusing herself from group conversations where I am deeply engaged, to "go up to bed early" which could be an opportunity for secret call or text

I'll continue this thought process later when I have a chance. I did test it more directly this morning.

[Mark K]

Have you asked about the lingerie? You mentioned that she has never had or worn lingerie in the past, correct? So this was a deliberate purchase she made (you did not give it to her as a gift) for you or possibly for someone else (or both.) Might it have been a gift from someone else that she was modeling for them? I always bought lingerie gifts for my past gfs early on in a relationship; sometimes just prior to having sex for the first time. I also now buy most of my wife's lingerie for her. It is a very deliberate and thought-provoking process to buy lingerie. It was intentional she picked out exactly what she was comfortable wearing, and liked how she looked wearing it.

[BallSpanking]

Before you install the Ring doorbell, consider the suite of options they offer in home security. These devices can listen-in as well as video record. They are also in the open, as they become a useful tool inside the home ...

[Boomhauer]

Is there a "the story so far" post? I want to read this, but 100 pages is a bit much.

[afagehi7]

I did review all the comments and suggestions, observations, etc. There are little signs when your lover has moved interest to someone else (certainly in our case). She has been acting a bit like she was when she was being secretive with Mr. B. to some degree. Or that's what I've decided. So I started testing the little things that are subtle and perhaps she is not even aware :

- She has been going into the other room when changing clothes, keeping her nakedness to herself

- Also with showering and after the shower making sure to cover up right away

- Extra possessive of her phone (lest a text message notification pop up unexpectedly even when in locked mode)

- Less patience with me

- Less natural touching and physical stuff like that

- Subtly turning away during the night when I place my hand on her hip or stomach ("it's too hot" etc.)

- Excusing herself from group conversations where I am deeply engaged, to "go up to bed early" which could be an opportunity for secret call or text

I'll continue this thought process later when I have a chance. I did test it more directly this morning.

Yikes!!! You're correct, these are certainly symptoms... She didn't do these things with Mr S or M did she?

Stay quiet so she gets comfortable. With comfort comes letting things slip.

Hopefully this isn't as bad as it could be such as a new Mr B incident.

I was unaware of her behaving like that during the Mr B era. It certainly confirms our suspicions... along with everything else...

Can't wait to hear more details.

[slenderfish]

Have you asked about the lingerie? You mentioned that she has never had or worn lingerie in the past, correct? So this was a deliberate purchase she made (you did not give it to her as a gift) for you or possibly for someone else (or both.) Might it have been a gift from someone else that she was modeling for them? I always bought lingerie gifts for my past gfs early on in a relationship; sometimes just prior to having sex for the first time. I also now buy most of my wife's lingerie for her. It is a very deliberate and thought-provoking process to buy lingerie. It was intentional she picked out exactly what she was comfortable wearing, and liked how she looked wearing it.

She had the lingerie from before. She got it at my encouragement to feel more sexy in advance for Mr. S. I now realize and remember, and confirm it's the same and only set she has.

[BallSpanking]

Are you out of town again this week, Fish?

[slenderfish]

Are you out of town again this week, Fish?

I am supposed to be catching a flight in two hours, to keep me away until Thursday evening. I assume that if she intends to cross paths with any new guy, it'll be while I'm away.

It's clear at this point that she won't be doing anything tonight. She ran out to a chiropractic appointment this afternoon.

Her calendar had a girls' night holiday gift exchange set for tomorrow night while I am away. But today she said one of the girls (Ms. Nordic) got the dates wrong and double booked the night, so they agreed to reschedule. Therefore, her night is now open with no plans. At the same time, no cover story if she needs one.

So I just looked at possible flights to get me home tomorrow night (e.g. earlier than expected). There is a perfect on ready, in case I decide to take that route. In this version, I would be able to arrive home after she departed for the evening and of course be here when she returns from the evening.

[slenderfish]

We went away on a quick overnight trip to visit my mother and brother and sister (and their families) ahead of the Christmas rush, to take all of them to dinner and express our holiday wishes, etc. Basically departed 1 p.m. Monday and returned 1 p.m. today. One-hour flight each way, with a two-hour drive from the closest airport to Mom's home. One time zone away. Thai food last night, a bottle of wine shared by SW and me, a nice visit, overnight sleep, up this morning and after some business calls we came home.

Overnight, she did retire early while we were visiting. She went up at around 10:30 p.m. I stayed and visited with the family group until 12:30 a.m.

During the middle of the night, I did reach over to lay my hand on her shoulder, but ended up with a handful of breast (over her night shirt). She turned away before I had a chance to reposition my hand. I wondered about that so, after a bit of time, moved my hand to her ass cheek. She knows that's my "comfort hold" if you will, makes me happy and I fall back asleep. In this case, she pushed my hand away and said "it's too hot" or similar.

So I decided to take a bit of action this morning, to test it. When we woke up, she asked if we could go get coffee. I know she essentially requires a coffee to have any kind of rational conversation in the mornings. I agreed we should sneak out, but had an observation and a question. First, I made the observation that she seemed to have been subtly pushing me away from her overnight. She made some reason about too hot, not able to sleep well, etc. I then moved to the question.

Me: I really enjoyed those images you sent last Wednesday night. But you've not mentioned anything about them since my return last Thursday night.

Her: Oh, well, it was a one-off.

Me: I am wondering a bit about the circumstances that led you to the mindset of taking the fabulous images and sending to me in the middle of the night.

Her: Oh, there were no circumstances. Not the kind you might be thinking about.

Me: Well, I loved the images and am happy to have them, and wanted to know the background so that I might encourage repeat for more of the same.

Her: [No meaningful reply]

At that point, she laid back down and offered her backside to me to rub, etc. I realized she wanted me to take her then, and there. Not sure if this was her desire, or her realizing that she should indulge my desire for whatever reason.

We did try to keep quiet, as it was morning and the house was waking up. As we moved through various positions (started from behind, then with leg up, then into missionary for the finish), I said the following:

"Well, I have a version that really works for my naughty imagination. I envision you at the bar at [happening, upscale bar/restaurant] after a few glasses of wine, perhaps as a wingman to your girlfriend, chatting up guys for her benefit. But while doing so one younger athletic guy is there with his friend, and you end up talking with this guy for hours, because he's confident, charming, nice smile, younger and handsome, and a great conversationalist. The kind of guy you prefer. That you end up giving him your number and make your way home. That upon arriving home, you are surprised he is calling you and you pick up the call. He and you engage in more conversation and you are feeling good, a bit horny, and he asks for you to send him a hot pic of you. You take the suggestion and pop several images, and send them to him to tease him so he will want more. That concept and the image of you being naughty like that is so hot to me and a supreme turn-on."

I then reached climax inside of her.

I then thanked her for the gift of providing that fantasy for me.

She sat there, kind of introspective, and said nothing.

And we then got ready, I did a quick shower, and she went off to coffee.

[BallSpanking]

You are giving away the extent of your awareness, Fish. If she was skittish before, she will be doubly so now ...
I sense her turning you away was not the usual response, emphasized by her removing your hand. One can only wonder
as to the underlying reason for her 'indisposition'.

She seems somewhat resentful of your inquiries, and quickly discounting your innuendos. She seemed reluctant to talk
about it ... As a guy, perhaps as a husband, one might be quick to assume her distancing to mean closeness to someone
else, but there could be any number of reasons for her discomfort.

One can only wonder ...

[slenderfish]

You are giving away the extent of your awareness, Fish. If she was skittish before, she will be doubly so now ...
I sense her turning you away was not the usual response, emphasized by her removing your hand. One can only wonder
as to the underlying reason for her 'indisposition'.

She seems somewhat resentful of your inquiries, and quickly discounting your innuendos. She seemed reluctant to talk
about it ... As a guy, perhaps as a husband, one might be quick to assume her distancing to mean closeness to someone
else, but there could be any number of reasons for her discomfort.

One can only wonder ...

I try to be calm and take the long road, but sometimes it's best to shortcut it if it looks more like a cheating scenario.

It's my plan now to have a conversation with her, heart to heart, honestly about her intentions in the hotwifing environment. She has trended more and more to where I now think she has been telling me that it's over and done. If that's truly the case, then there is no good explanation for her recent naughtiness except for her self-aggrandizement or other, none of which are useful or beneficial to our marriage. Or to me, if not within an (even loosely-agreed) hotwife framework.

I'll start with her toast from October, regarding her wish for me to get my wish by my birthday. I now wonder if I've been misinterpreting what she said at that point, what it is to which she was referring. If she clearly and cleanly positions herself permanently out of the hotwife game, then we do have quite an issue here. If she hims and haws and kind of implies a level of energy on it, then I will quietly and carefully retreat.

[ResponsibullCummings]

It really seems like when you started pressing her to explain the back story behind the pictures she sent she wanted to change the subject. The best way to do that was to let you have sex with her. Seeems to have worked like a charm. Get that ring door bell installed. She probably doesn't know it can save the video images and thinks it only works in real time. Don't explain how it works to her and just review the captures from nights you are away

[anonymister1948]

So she's back to her usual MO of cheating.

[afagehi7]

You are giving away the extent of your awareness, Fish. If she was skittish before, she will be doubly so now ...
I sense her turning you away was not the usual response, emphasized by her removing your hand. One can only wonder
as to the underlying reason for her 'indisposition'.

She seems somewhat resentful of your inquiries, and quickly discounting your innuendos. She seemed reluctant to talk
about it ... As a guy, perhaps as a husband, one might be quick to assume her distancing to mean closeness to someone
else, but there could be any number of reasons for her discomfort.

One can only wonder ...

I try to be calm and take the long road, but sometimes it's best to shortcut it if it looks more like a cheating scenario.

It's my plan now to have a conversation with her, heart to heart, honestly about her intentions in the hotwifing environment. She has trended more and more to where I now think she has been telling me that it's over and done. If that's truly the case, then there is no good explanation for her recent naughtiness except for her self-aggrandizement or other, none of which are useful or beneficial to our marriage. Or to me, if not within an (even loosely-agreed) hotwife framework.

I'll start with her toast from October, regarding her wish for me to get my wish by my birthday. I now wonder if I've been misinterpreting what she said at that point, what it is to which she was referring. If she clearly and cleanly positions herself permanently out of the hotwife game, then we do have quite an issue here. If she hims and haws and kind of implies a level of energy on it, then I will quietly and carefully retreat.

Don't show your hand fish! You revealed too much.

Wait until after your birthday to have the talk. In the meantime, observe and collect evidence. Whatever happens, don't show your hand or reveal what you know or suspect. Before you say anything wait for a few hours... Meaning don't act out of emotion.

When is your birthday? Soon I presume?

Strategy, be a surgeon not a butcher

[slenderfish]

You are giving away the extent of your awareness, Fish. If she was skittish before, she will be doubly so now ...
I sense her turning you away was not the usual response, emphasized by her removing your hand. One can only wonder
as to the underlying reason for her 'indisposition'.

She seems somewhat resentful of your inquiries, and quickly discounting your innuendos. She seemed reluctant to talk
about it ... As a guy, perhaps as a husband, one might be quick to assume her distancing to mean closeness to someone
else, but there could be any number of reasons for her discomfort.

One can only wonder ...

I try to be calm and take the long road, but sometimes it's best to shortcut it if it looks more like a cheating scenario.

It's my plan now to have a conversation with her, heart to heart, honestly about her intentions in the hotwifing environment. She has trended more and more to where I now think she has been telling me that it's over and done. If that's truly the case, then there is no good explanation for her recent naughtiness except for her self-aggrandizement or other, none of which are useful or beneficial to our marriage. Or to me, if not within an (even loosely-agreed) hotwife framework.

I'll start with her toast from October, regarding her wish for me to get my wish by my birthday. I now wonder if I've been misinterpreting what she said at that point, what it is to which she was referring. If she clearly and cleanly positions herself permanently out of the hotwife game, then we do have quite an issue here. If she hims and haws and kind of implies a level of energy on it, then I will quietly and carefully retreat.

Don't show your hand fish! You revealed too much.

Wait until after your birthday to have the talk. In the meantime, observe and collect evidence. Whatever happens, don't show your hand or reveal what you know or suspect. Before you say anything wait for a few hours... Meaning don't act out of emotion.

When is your birthday? Soon I presume?

Strategy, be a surgeon not a butcher

Okay, I did take a breath but not before cancelling my trip altogether for this week. When SW returned from her chiro appointment I was out having dinner by myself and taking stock of everything. I then sent her a text letting her know I was going to defer the trip and just go next week instead.

When I did get home, she had eaten and was watching television. She had not seen her phone and was shocked I was coming in the door, as she had naturally assumed I was well on my way to Texas.

I will watch to see if she has any sudden communication with the guy or guys (e.g. to change plans, etc.). This will be more info gathering that I will hold to my vest.

Finally, my birthday is not soon. It's in the early summer!

[superb101]

What reason did you give her for cancelling your trip?