Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHWs only!
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CurvyNerdMILF
- Verified Hot Wife
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Re: Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHWs only!
Humans have a range of sexual turn-ons that basically translates into every person having traits that will be found attractive by someone. Everyone is sexy to at least one other person, and usually a heck of a lot more.
I happen to desire a variety of male-bodied people with the main commonality among them being that they are really smart, very kind, very sexual. Many guys I enjoy being with (including my husband) are a mix of very stereotypically masculine traits and softer ones associated with femininity. Some of them actively work to reject toxic masculinity, even in their professional lives. Several of my sexiest lovers have been pan- or bisexual. I joke that my husband is the switchiest switch who ever switched. Even in the bedroom, dominant and submissive roles are about a moment, not an identity.
So, the alpha/beta male concept is completely distant from my reality. It has nothing to offer rather than tell men who they should be rather than just let them be and accept themselves.
I happen to desire a variety of male-bodied people with the main commonality among them being that they are really smart, very kind, very sexual. Many guys I enjoy being with (including my husband) are a mix of very stereotypically masculine traits and softer ones associated with femininity. Some of them actively work to reject toxic masculinity, even in their professional lives. Several of my sexiest lovers have been pan- or bisexual. I joke that my husband is the switchiest switch who ever switched. Even in the bedroom, dominant and submissive roles are about a moment, not an identity.
So, the alpha/beta male concept is completely distant from my reality. It has nothing to offer rather than tell men who they should be rather than just let them be and accept themselves.
I am: The female half of a married, polyamorous stag/vixen pair
Available for: I’m pretty polysaturated at the moment.
Current fantasy: (Pondering…)
My adventures: viewtopic.php?f=5&t=63778
Available for: I’m pretty polysaturated at the moment.
Current fantasy: (Pondering…)
My adventures: viewtopic.php?f=5&t=63778
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MatureNJCouple
- Virgin
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- Joined: Sat Dec 11, 2021 10:44 am
Re: Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHWs only!
Can I ask the VHWs what was their age when they began Hotwifeing? Were any of you in your 50s or older?
Re: Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHWs only!
I started in my mind 40's, around age 43 or so but it was quite infrequent. I really got active in it shortly after turning 50.MatureNJCouple wrote: ↑Wed Dec 15, 2021 1:37 pmCan I ask the VHWs what was their age when they began Hotwifeing? Were any of you in your 50s or older?
Somebody should be told
My libido hasn't been controlled
My libido hasn't been controlled
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Lookingforadventure
Re: Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHWs only!
I was 43MatureNJCouple wrote: ↑Wed Dec 15, 2021 1:37 pmCan I ask the VHWs what was their age when they began Hotwifeing? Were any of you in your 50s or older?
- Farmgirl
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- Location: Arkansas, USA. Bordering the Choctaw Nation
Re: Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHWs only!
MatureNJCouple wrote: ↑Wed Dec 15, 2021 1:37 pmCan I ask the VHWs what was their age when they began Hotwifeing? Were any of you in your 50s or older?
I started at 37. My activity increased after 50 and again after 60
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MatureNJCouple
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Re: Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHWs only!
Thanks for all your replies. Do you think we would have any trouble finding dates for my wife. She is in her late 50s, tall and slim and very attractive. Guys still check her out and hit on her at parties, bars etc.
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Nearnorth4livin
- Experienced
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- Location: huntsville ont
- Contact:
Re: Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHWs only!
Almost a cuckold here..do hotwives like to get their cucks to suck the bull? Topic hasnt come up here in our roleplay dirty talking..just trying to be prepared if told to! Thnx
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Anonymousrachel
- Verified Hot Wife
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- Location: Ohio
Re: Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHWs only!
I am 37 and we just started this year. My husband asked me to 3 years ago and I honestly wish I would have taken the leap back then.MatureNJCouple wrote: ↑Wed Dec 15, 2021 1:37 pmCan I ask the VHWs what was their age when they began Hotwifeing? Were any of you in your 50s or older?
Married to Anonymousrob
Our story: viewtopic.php?f=5&t=71701
Our pictures: viewtopic.php?f=9&t=73304
Our story: viewtopic.php?f=5&t=71701
Our pictures: viewtopic.php?f=9&t=73304
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Anonymousrachel
- Verified Hot Wife
- Posts: 157
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- Location: Ohio
Re: Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHWs only!
Honestly, age is a number. I know of people who are from our area that are much older than myself and are still successful at finding dates. There are some men out there who would love to have a woman of her age.MatureNJCouple wrote: ↑Thu Dec 16, 2021 7:00 amThanks for all your replies. Do you think we would have any trouble finding dates for my wife. She is in her late 50s, tall and slim and very attractive. Guys still check her out and hit on her at parties, bars etc.
Married to Anonymousrob
Our story: viewtopic.php?f=5&t=71701
Our pictures: viewtopic.php?f=9&t=73304
Our story: viewtopic.php?f=5&t=71701
Our pictures: viewtopic.php?f=9&t=73304
Re: Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHWs only!
Hang on, I'll consult the hive mindNearnorth4livin wrote: ↑Thu Dec 16, 2021 11:05 amAlmost a cuckold here..do hotwives like to get their cucks to suck the bull? Topic hasnt come up here in our roleplay dirty talking..just trying to be prepared if told to! Thnx
Ask your wife what SHE likes.
It's all fun until someone gets hurt... and then it's more fun! :whip:
https://thehappyhotwife.blogspot.com/
https://thehappyhotwife.blogspot.com/
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Nearnorth4livin
- Experienced
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- Location: huntsville ont
- Contact:
Re: Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHWs only!
Thnx..i will see how things play out.
Re: Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHWs only!
I will be away from my girlfriend for an year starting August 2022. She will join me in August 2023.
In that backdrop I have been trying to get her to enjoy phone sex / video chats. Initially I wanted to try out phone sex but she herself suggested we do video chat because she can't talk a lot while touching herself
It's been two days straight and I must say I have blown away in terms of my expectations. She has really enjoyed the stripping, touching, teasing etc.
She doesn't know about my hotwife fetish yet. My plan is to propose her a threesome in a year when she visits me for her winter break. How should I plan my next steps with her?
In that backdrop I have been trying to get her to enjoy phone sex / video chats. Initially I wanted to try out phone sex but she herself suggested we do video chat because she can't talk a lot while touching herself
It's been two days straight and I must say I have blown away in terms of my expectations. She has really enjoyed the stripping, touching, teasing etc.
She doesn't know about my hotwife fetish yet. My plan is to propose her a threesome in a year when she visits me for her winter break. How should I plan my next steps with her?
- Farmgirl
- Verified Hot Wife
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- Joined: Fri Jun 28, 2019 6:38 pm
- Location: Arkansas, USA. Bordering the Choctaw Nation
Re: Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHWs only!
MatureNJCouple wrote: ↑Thu Dec 16, 2021 7:00 amThanks for all your replies. Do you think we would have any trouble finding dates for my wife. She is in her late 50s, tall and slim and very attractive. Guys still check her out and hit on her at parties, bars etc.
If the woman exudes confidence and confident sexuality, men will find her attractive. They like all ages, sizes, and body types. And. many young men are drawn to mature women, we know what we like and aren't afraid to say so!
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Bongomadness 6969
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Re: Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHWs only!
My question is pretty simple.... Do you hide anything from your husband's? Any secrets or details that you know he would love that you don't tell him?
Re: Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHWs only!
No secrets at all, total honesty that's the keyBongomadness 6969 wrote: ↑Fri Dec 24, 2021 7:30 pmMy question is pretty simple.... Do you hide anything from your husband's? Any secrets or details that you know he would love that you don't tell him?
viewtopic.php?f=5&t=61823 - Our journey
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2inUPMichigan
- VHW Admin
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- Joined: Sun Jul 08, 2018 2:18 pm
Re: Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHWs only!
I tell him everything he wants to know. But there are some things he doesn't want to know about and those things I keep to myself at HIS request.Bongomadness 6969 wrote: ↑Fri Dec 24, 2021 7:30 pmMy question is pretty simple.... Do you hide anything from your husband's? Any secrets or details that you know he would love that you don't tell him?
Re: Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHWs only!
My hub knows all, that's the way we both want it. No secrets. Secrets will kill a relationship.Bongomadness 6969 wrote: ↑Fri Dec 24, 2021 7:30 pmMy question is pretty simple.... Do you hide anything from your husband's? Any secrets or details that you know he would love that you don't tell him?
Now if he was of the 'don't ask, don't tell' mindset, that'd be different. But since he wants to know, I tell.
Somebody should be told
My libido hasn't been controlled
My libido hasn't been controlled
- Farmgirl
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- Joined: Fri Jun 28, 2019 6:38 pm
- Location: Arkansas, USA. Bordering the Choctaw Nation
Re: Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHWs only!
Bongomadness 6969 wrote: ↑Fri Dec 24, 2021 7:30 pmMy question is pretty simple.... Do you hide anything from your husband's? Any secrets or details that you know he would love that you don't tell him?
No hiding things for me. My Number1 wants to hear all about it, and I like to tell him just how naughty I've been
Hiding things is a form of dishonesty to me.
Re: Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHWs only!
There is a difference between secrecy and privacy, and I shouldn't have to explain that.Bongomadness 6969 wrote: ↑Fri Dec 24, 2021 7:30 pmMy question is pretty simple.... Do you hide anything from your husband's? Any secrets or details that you know he would love that you don't tell him?
I keep no secrets from my husband, except good secrets like gifts. Do I have privacy from him? Of course. Every relationship has its own private moments. I don't repeat my private moments with my boyfriend with my husband, or vice versa. That would be disrespectful to them both.
When you have a relationship with another person, sharing private information without their consent isn't ethical. I know some people tell their spouses everything, even stuff from best friends etc- I think that is a degree of enmeshment that isn't super healthy, personally. My boyfriend is not a prop in my marital sex life- he's a person, and he deserves privacy unless that has been explicitly discussed and agreed to. But that isn't hiding anything. If my husband had the expectation that I would share private things, I think the problem would be that he had an unreasonable expectation.
Fortunately, the three of us are content with the level of sharing we have now. And it was in fact explicitly negotiated and not assumed.
It's all fun until someone gets hurt... and then it's more fun! :whip:
https://thehappyhotwife.blogspot.com/
https://thehappyhotwife.blogspot.com/
Re: Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHWs only!
I'm just chiming in to agree 100% with that difference. Relationships are not depositions. But there are things my hubby wants to know from me that he should know, and vice versa. THAT is what we share. He knows things about his work, friends, colleagues etc. that are none of my business, and vice versa there too. We both know how to keep those types of secrets.SSQ wrote: ↑Sun Dec 26, 2021 10:06 amThere is a difference between secrecy and privacyBongomadness 6969 wrote: ↑Fri Dec 24, 2021 7:30 pmMy question is pretty simple.... Do you hide anything from your husband's? Any secrets or details that you know he would love that you don't tell him?
Somebody should be told
My libido hasn't been controlled
My libido hasn't been controlled
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CurvyNerdMILF
- Verified Hot Wife
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- Joined: Wed Jul 28, 2021 4:03 pm
- Location: Portland, OR
Re: Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHWs only!
I’m also in the privacy club. I try not to mislead anyone, I won’t lie. But I believe that everyone should be able to define the amount of privacy they have in their relationships. My husband has a moderate desire for privacy. Two other lovers have both been bulls; one of those has also been a stag. They both seem to very much enjoy hearing about my adventures and having information shared about them, either with other people directly or in writing here. I like to ask my lovers directly if I can tell others (including my husband) about what we do, talk about, or even have pictures of. At times, I have had shyer lovers who don’t even talk with me much about what we’ve done in the past, and I share very little about what I do with them—even if they are great lovers.Bongomadness 6969 wrote: ↑Fri Dec 24, 2021 7:30 pmMy question is pretty simple.... Do you hide anything from your husband's? Any secrets or details that you know he would love that you don't tell him?
I am: The female half of a married, polyamorous stag/vixen pair
Available for: I’m pretty polysaturated at the moment.
Current fantasy: (Pondering…)
My adventures: viewtopic.php?f=5&t=63778
Available for: I’m pretty polysaturated at the moment.
Current fantasy: (Pondering…)
My adventures: viewtopic.php?f=5&t=63778
Re: Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHWs only!
How much pressure should a budding hotwife feel to measure up to the activities engaged in by seasoned hotwifes? Should she feel like she doesn't measure up just because she isn't as active or as kinky as more experienced hotwives?
Asking for a (very dear) friend.
Asking for a (very dear) friend.
Mr-Nobody
Caramel55’s husband
Caramel55’s husband
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Lookingforadventure
Re: Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHWs only!
Nope. Every person's journey is unique. You...I mean, your friend...needs to figure out what feels right to her and her husband.mr-nobody wrote: ↑Wed Dec 29, 2021 2:24 pmHow much pressure should a budding hotwife feel to measure up to the activities engaged in by seasoned hotwifes? Should she feel like she doesn't measure up just because she isn't as active or as kinky as more experienced hotwives?
Asking for a (very dear) friend.
I don't think I could flirt with and pick up a guy at a bar or the feed store. That doesn't make me less a hot wife than those who can. I have had success meeting some good guys online. That doesn't make other approaches bad.
As for kink, each person is unique. Be you!!
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2inUPMichigan
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Re: Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHWs only!
None at all because we are all unique individuals who make different choices based on our personal situations. None of the "seasoned hotwives" follow the same rule book we are all very different in how we walk this path.mr-nobody wrote: ↑Wed Dec 29, 2021 2:24 pmHow much pressure should a budding hotwife feel to measure up to the activities engaged in by seasoned hotwifes? Should she feel like she doesn't measure up just because she isn't as active or as kinky as more experienced hotwives?
Asking for a (very dear) friend.

Some hotwives are more vanilla and some more kinky it's personal preferences nothing more.

Some of us go on play dates only once in a while and others have play dates several times a week. The frequency of play dates is what works for the two of you, NOT what the next couple would choose.
Re: Ask a Hotwife Thread, to be answered by VHWs only!
How much pressure? None whatsoever. She should follower her desires, in conjunction with the limits/rules that are in place with her spouse, if any. "Hotwifing" is not a destination to be reached, it's a journey and we gals choose our own paths.mr-nobody wrote: ↑Wed Dec 29, 2021 2:24 pmHow much pressure should a budding hotwife feel to measure up to the activities engaged in by seasoned hotwifes? Should she feel like she doesn't measure up just because she isn't as active or as kinky as more experienced hotwives?
Asking for a (very dear) friend.
Somebody should be told
My libido hasn't been controlled
My libido hasn't been controlled