My wife is getting close to her first affair.
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Re: My wife is getting close to her first affair.
“jguy” I’m sort of confused by your responses. I’m wondering if maybe some others aren’t confused as well. Are you enjoying being treated this way by your wife?
I understand you like the reality of your wife giving herself to this man. That, however, is a very different issue from you enjoying being treated in this matter by your wife. So, please, no justifying explanations. “Yes” or “no”, do you enjoy this treatment?
It’s “ok” if you enjoy it. I’m thinking, that if you do, it might be to your (and everyone else here) benefit to admit it, then stand up for what you enjoy or don’t enjoy.
Just sayin’.
I understand you like the reality of your wife giving herself to this man. That, however, is a very different issue from you enjoying being treated in this matter by your wife. So, please, no justifying explanations. “Yes” or “no”, do you enjoy this treatment?
It’s “ok” if you enjoy it. I’m thinking, that if you do, it might be to your (and everyone else here) benefit to admit it, then stand up for what you enjoy or don’t enjoy.
Just sayin’.
Re: My wife is getting close to her first affair.
No what you are feeling is to be expected.
What you have explored is something very few venture into because emotionally and mentally they are not up to it. Anything worthwhile is never easy.
As long as you and your wife's focus continues to be about sharing and loving each other then the chance of it working out well is good.
Having said that there are no guarantees, there are lots of stories on here where it went horribly wrong.
Re: My wife is getting close to her first affair.
Thank you for saying this. It makes me feel better about sharing my experiences on here.
Re: My wife is getting close to her first affair.
Confrontation can be hard especially if you are not sure what you want. Once this fantasy or lifestyle gets started it is hard to control. The only power that you have is to say no. You can't control other people and they can't control you unless you let them. The hard part is dealing with the consequences of your choices, either way you choose.
Re: My wife is getting close to her first affair.
You are in this as a together adventure (as I previously noted, above). But it seems her version of together is different from yours. It also seems she is realizing her power (she with the pussy sets the rules) and you are kind of stuck with whatever she sets as the rules. This appears to be morphing from a hotwife situation to more of a power-exchange (adjustment) and it's unbalanced based on what you noted as your original expectations. But it can become balanced (for you) if you are willing to make the adjustments she is requiring. You can fight it, accept it, or renegotiate.slenderfish wrote: ↑Sat Aug 20, 2022 6:43 amIt's very new and your inclinations to let her enjoy first, then deal with your feelings, is spot on. This is a place where you can really mess it up. Your feelings come with this territory, and of your needs are real. But her NRE is going to drive her and you should let her have her cake. That's what you wanted.jguy wrote: ↑Sat Aug 20, 2022 3:32 amWell, we talked about me being involved. She said when he comes over I can hang out until they go in the bedroom, when they are ready for me to come in and watch them, she will call me but I am not allowed to make one noise or to touch them.
She said she thought it would be very hard for me to watch them fuck, but I am very excited to be a part.
She agreed i could stroke myself as long as I didn't get close to the bed.
I'm so excited! I can hardly wait for him to show up!
Well, to be more accurate, you probably wanted the sex part for her, and she wanted the desired/feelings part (and the sex follows). Now you are catching feelings and are having to deal with them. Your solution is back into the sex part, and that's terrific, but as Parklife noted above, the feelings part may really ramp up for you. Be ready.
Perhaps you can game it out with your wife in advance, as to what you might do, and that whatever you do, you will let them be and also assure her that you will be okay. For example, if it gets too intense for you, then you will quietly excuse yourself from the room without any fanfare. That she need not jump up and chase you out to reassure you, or anything like that. Your role is quiet observer, etc.
Back to the prior subject, your present feelings. It's not wrong to mention that you do exist, that you support her fun, and that you also want to have some of your own cake, if possible. That you are in this as a together adventure. Seems like you have made good progress on this front.
Just keep it as her thing, her fun, her candy, and that you are supportive and will participate at the level a) you like and b) she can accommodate.
Looking forward to hearing how it all goes.
Does she have the ability to express empathy for your situation (e.g. you are cut off and that she is setting all the rules)?
Or, to put it again as I did in my posting above,
"Back to the prior subject, your present feelings. It's not wrong to mention that you do exist, that you support her fun, and that you also want to have some of your own cake, if possible. That you are in this as a together adventure. Seems like you have made good progress on this front.
Just keep it as her thing, her fun, her candy, and that you are supportive and will participate at the level a) you like and b) she can accommodate."
You will have to have this conversation sooner or later, so why not just get into it now? The longer you wait, the more difficult it will be.
Actually, by not having this conversation, she has effectively renegotiated with you, and you have acceded.
Re: My wife is getting close to her first affair.
She does show empathy. She knows it's been hard for me. She reminds me quite often, "You are the one that pushed him on me". (I did provoke her to let him touch her back, and I did buy her wine and told her to have fun and do whatever you want). So, it's not that she always uses that on me, but just as a reminder. We like each other, and lately Ethan has been showing his bad side more. (He's doesn't have a lot of discrepancy when he talks). To his credit, he is 20 years younger than me. In short, this is bringing her back around to wanting to be around me more (finally!). So, as I believe you suggested, the NRE is wearing off. She still likes him a lot, but she is not completely enamored by him.
We are back to being a couple and have come to a good middle ground.
He let himself in the other night and crawled in bed on her side. I could see his fingers through her hair as he kissed her.
Her leg was lifted over his. It looked so nice, I started touching her butt. She almost immediately took my hand off her and held it. It was still nice though. He then got on top of her and she continued holding my hand while they kissed. Her leg was over mine leg and her foot was touching mine.
I heard her gasp, and I knew he was inserting himself into her. She grabbed my penis and just held it while her foot pushed on my leg.
I don't know why, I just really liked it.
As he made love to her, I watched her head moved up and down the pillow, she just looked into my eyes and held on to my erection.
I don't think he liked this because he turned her head toward him and kissed her and started fucking her really hard. Maybe to get her attention. It did work. She came super hard and squeezed my penis really hard as she orgasmed, then he came also.
This time, I didn't eat her afterwards, and she didn't ask me to.
He said bye and left, and I cuddled up next to her backside. She was very from his cum, but it didn't matter. We just fell asleep. It was very nice.
We are back to being a couple and have come to a good middle ground.
He let himself in the other night and crawled in bed on her side. I could see his fingers through her hair as he kissed her.
Her leg was lifted over his. It looked so nice, I started touching her butt. She almost immediately took my hand off her and held it. It was still nice though. He then got on top of her and she continued holding my hand while they kissed. Her leg was over mine leg and her foot was touching mine.
I heard her gasp, and I knew he was inserting himself into her. She grabbed my penis and just held it while her foot pushed on my leg.
I don't know why, I just really liked it.
As he made love to her, I watched her head moved up and down the pillow, she just looked into my eyes and held on to my erection.
I don't think he liked this because he turned her head toward him and kissed her and started fucking her really hard. Maybe to get her attention. It did work. She came super hard and squeezed my penis really hard as she orgasmed, then he came also.
This time, I didn't eat her afterwards, and she didn't ask me to.
He said bye and left, and I cuddled up next to her backside. She was very from his cum, but it didn't matter. We just fell asleep. It was very nice.
Re: My wife is getting close to her first affair.
Wow
Exactly the sex we would want our wives to have.
Thank you for that excellent description.
Exactly the sex we would want our wives to have.
Thank you for that excellent description.
Re: My wife is getting close to her first affair.
Things have cooled down with my wife's boyfriend. We've enjoyed some great sex and felt like we connected better than ever. He talked with her this week and told her things were rough with him and his wife, and they probably aren't going to stay together. She mentioned we have a nice set-up downstairs if he needed a place to stay. He's a great guy and I like the idea of him staying here, but I'm not sure if this would take the relationship with him too far. If I knew it was temporary (maybe a couple weeks) that could be fun, but I'm concerned about how much interaction my wife would have with him. Any thoughts?
Re: My wife is getting close to her first affair.
I’m confused. Do you want the relationship, that you wife is having, to happen or are you just accepting it?jguy wrote: ↑Fri Sep 30, 2022 1:54 amThings have cooled down with my wife's boyfriend. We've enjoyed some great sex and felt like we connected better than ever. He talked with her this week and told her things were rough with him and his wife, and they probably aren't going to stay together. She mentioned we have a nice set-up downstairs if he needed a place to stay. He's a great guy and I like the idea of him staying here, but I'm not sure if this would take the relationship with him too far. If I knew it was temporary (maybe a couple weeks) that could be fun, but I'm concerned about how much interaction my wife would have with him. Any thoughts?
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Re: My wife is getting close to her first affair.
Of course it's a bad idea to have him move in. But you know that already, right?
Re: My wife is getting close to her first affair.
So how are things going? It's been a while since your last post. Did he move in?
Re: My wife is getting close to her first affair.
Read this viewtopic.php?f=6&t=58221 not a good idea in my books.jguy wrote: ↑Fri Sep 30, 2022 1:54 amThings have cooled down with my wife's boyfriend. We've enjoyed some great sex and felt like we connected better than ever. He talked with her this week and told her things were rough with him and his wife, and they probably aren't going to stay together. She mentioned we have a nice set-up downstairs if he needed a place to stay. He's a great guy and I like the idea of him staying here, but I'm not sure if this would take the relationship with him too far. If I knew it was temporary (maybe a couple weeks) that could be fun, but I'm concerned about how much interaction my wife would have with him. Any thoughts?
Re: My wife is getting close to her first affair.
It's a good to have some variety.
Last edited by jguy on Wed Oct 19, 2022 1:26 am, edited 1 time in total.
Re: My wife is getting close to her first affair.
Are you still having PIV sex with your wife?
Our story so far: http://ourhotwives.org/forum/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=41480
Re: My wife is getting close to her first affair.
I just don't get it. It seems so apparent to me that you are being pushed out. I have trouble seeing this making Jguy's life better. But I never wanted to be a cuckold or dominated. The people we were with were more or less sex toys we could share together. They had the benefit of some great sex and new woman while we had a live dildo.Of course his feelings were attended to at the time but we moved on after. No relationship past being comfortable enough to let him join us once. And never a friend or acquaintance. We want them there when we want them and then back in the drawer with the other toys.
Re: My wife is getting close to her first affair.
by proudhusb217 » Fri Sep 30, 2022 12:05 pm
Of course it's a bad idea to have him move in. But you know that already, right?
OP likes danger and risk
Maybe if she moves out or puts hubby out it would be the ultimate cucking for him
Re: My wife is getting close to her first affair.
Our relationship is fine. The other night he got in bed with us, she turned towards me and put her lips against mine, occasionally kissing me. She stuck her ass out towards him and the entire time they had sex she would breath hard on my lips with every pleasure she received. She let me know how good he felt and would kiss me as she made me cum in her hand. She put her arms around me and held me until he came. It was very sensual.
Re: My wife is getting close to her first affair.
So beautiful to be holding your wife while she is being fucked by another man in your bed.jguy wrote: ↑Wed Oct 19, 2022 2:25 amOur relationship is fine. The other night he got in bed with us, she turned towards me and put her lips against mine, occasionally kissing me. She stuck her ass out towards him and the entire time they had sex she would breath hard on my lips with every pleasure she received. She let me know how good he felt and would kiss me as she made me cum in her hand. She put her arms around me and held me until he came. It was very sensual.
Re: My wife is getting close to her first affair.
It is! He came up in our room this morning again and got in bed with her before he went to work. He got on top of her naked body. He started kissing her mouth and sucking on her little 'a' cup breast. I heard her gasp as he put himself into my wife. I just laid there with my head on my pillow a watched them have sex - hard as a rock. It was short, but super hot. He told her he was coming, she said 'ok" and they kissed hard and he came in her. She laughed afterwards, gave him a big hug and a kiss and said "thankyou for the nice surprise!"
After he left I went down on her and had sex! It was a great way to start the day!
After he left I went down on her and had sex! It was a great way to start the day!
Re: My wife is getting close to her first affair.
When you say you “had sex,” you mean you’re fucking your wife again?jguy wrote: ↑Wed Oct 19, 2022 4:50 amIt is! He came up in our room this morning again and got in bed with her before he went to work. He got on top of her naked body. He started kissing her mouth and sucking on her little 'a' cup breast. I heard her gasp as he put himself into my wife. I just laid there with my head on my pillow a watched them have sex - hard as a rock. It was short, but super hot. He told her he was coming, she said 'ok" and they kissed hard and he came in her. She laughed afterwards, gave him a big hug and a kiss and said "thankyou for the nice surprise!"
After he left I went down on her and had sex! It was a great way to start the day!
Our story so far: http://ourhotwives.org/forum/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=41480
Re: My wife is getting close to her first affair.
Yes, I think things have died down with him. He's not all that she thought he was.
It may not last a lot longer. Living together is too much of him for her, at least I think.
It may not last a lot longer. Living together is too much of him for her, at least I think.
Re: My wife is getting close to her first affair.
You never really know a person until you live with them for a while. That is why when a wife hooks up with someone at 1st, they can do no wrong and are amazingly fun to be around, then they leave the toilet seat up that one time. he he
Re: My wife is getting close to her first affair.
Yep I say to my wife you searched and searched for the perfect male You found me and now you want to change me