Hotwife going out alone/why is it too difficult for me?

Open2it · Unread post by **Open2it** » Tue Nov 29, 2022 1:27 am

You did well on all fronts.

lkh96 · Unread post by **lkh96** » Tue Nov 29, 2022 8:21 am

Haha the Reese's are back.
We miss you.

Unread post by **mrs_reese** » Tue Nov 29, 2022 11:15 am

Open2it
2 Bit Whore
Re: Hotwife going out alone/why is it too difficult for me?
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Post Tue Nov 29, 2022 6:27 am

You did well on all fronts.

Thank you

Unread post by **mrs_reese** » Tue Nov 29, 2022 11:18 am

Ikh96 thank you

Unread post by **mrs_reese** » Tue Nov 29, 2022 11:24 am

Nothing much happened last night!
But I thought I’d share some conversation between MrR and I.
So we’re making dinner last night and he was focused on me. Ask me how I felt 24 hours later if everything’s OK and I appreciate that I was really nice to hear that he was just concerned for me. Never did he talk about my new friend.
But he brought up a conversation we talked about the night before and that is, how do I explain to him our situation.

He said that he caught his ex lover in bed with another man a few years ago and he’s a little sensitive to cheating I wanted to say how ironic that you’re actually with a woman and you are assuming she’s cheating on her husband But I never did open my mouth lol

So I brought it up to my husband last night and he said well do you mind if I share my opinion?

Again, I am amazed he’s taking all the right steps by allowing me to be in control and basically be in charge and I replied, absolutely I want to hear from man’s perspective.

He said that eventually the subject is going to come up as man is not going to have sex with me on occasions without worrying about the husband, so if, and when the subject comes up; that I have two choices. I can play the role of a cheating wife and it’s something that I wanna do for myself, or I can tell him that hubby and I have a martial arrangement, he does his thing I do my thing.

we don’t ask and we don’t tell.

I thought that was very refreshing that he suggested those two different points of view.

I’m not sure what I am going to say when my lover asks me about hubby.

I like the idea of a cheating wife, it makes sex a little bit more rougher and full of taboo

I like knowing I’m in charge of making all my decisions, but I do know that if I start feeling emotions for this man, I probably will tell him that we have an arrangement and we don’t ask or tell.

james2011 · Unread post by **james2011** » Tue Nov 29, 2022 1:21 pm

Welcome back, you’ve been missed. Glad things are still going well.

Unread post by **mrs_reese** » Wed Nov 30, 2022 6:09 am

Thank you James

Unread post by **jane** » Wed Nov 30, 2022 10:51 am

that's interesting. i've read that some men have a lover cheat and one will turn to being a cuckold , while others want to take on the role of a bull. funny how it triggers different responses

Unread post by **mrs_reese** » Wed Nov 30, 2022 12:06 pm

Hi Jane. Hubby is completely over the cuckold role as he’s really enjoying the role as a stag.

I’ve only learned what that term means recently.

Update :
Last night hubby and I met separately at a local bar.
He was seated before I arrived.
I swear to god that I can’t make up what happened next;
As I sat next to him, my new lover was as sitting 2 seats awqy to him. I looked at hubby and was literally laughing out loud telling him that HE is the one.
Of course it was difficult to ignore my new guy as we texted back and forth.
I was a little jealous as he was talking to a few girls seated nearby.
Hubby was calm and was loving the moment.
Nothing much happened after that but we do have a house date set to for tonight!
More later

Unread post by **mrs_reese** » Thu Dec 01, 2022 1:55 am

So our meet up was cancelled last night because he worked later than expected.
He’s asking me many questions about hubby and if he knows we had sex,

We set up a house visit tonite and I informed him that I will tell him everything.

Btw his name is jeff.
I’m feeling more anticipation and excitement to have sex with jeff tonight, I want this to develop into a boyfriend relationship.

Unread post by **mrs_reese** » Thu Dec 01, 2022 2:08 am

I forgot to mention , I asked hubby to share some thoughts because it’s been a while since he last wrote on this thread he created, can you believe, 14 years ago

reese · Unread post by **reese** » Thu Dec 01, 2022 4:40 am

Hello everybody!
It seems to have been forever since I last post…..
I have so much to say, I am not sure if everyone really wants to hear what I have to say as this thread has definitely been dominated by my wife for a while!
Quote honestly……. We stopped Hotwife play due to my passive aggressiveness…. The constant barrage of text messages and inquiries to my wife seeking more information about a lover she’s talking to, or when she was with HIM, I’d send her messages asking for a report and when she will be coming home…: telling her I need to cum, hurry home, or if I happened to lose self control and orgasm, asking her to come home soon…. Dealing with the constant pangs of jealousy…
The 24/7 constant adrenaline rushes that I would send forth to my wife…… tell me more…. When will you see him again…. Are you craving his cock…will you fall in love….
Omg I can go on and on but I’m sure you understand!

Our sexual relationship was suffering from my lack of self control! My wife would go into shut down mode…
She would start ignoring messages from the other guy because she knew that I would be obsessive with feeding my addiction!

Yes it was becoming too addictive for me!
I was constantly living in a world of total lack of self control that was affecting my life!
My career was lacking focus, lack of an appetite, all I wanted was Hotwife interaction!
Whether it was verbal talk, real life action, reviewing all her text messages over and over again stroking myself….
When I tell you all that it was really bad…. Believe me it was an excruciating euphoria that never left me!

But I am who i am, I own that!
I go 100 MPH all the time… all in or all out!

I would claim I wasn’t jealous… and I didn’t believe I was a jealous guy! It was more like self sabotage at times.. how far could I push her buttons…. How fast could I make her go!

It was a horrible addiction that needed to be fed minute by minute!

I’ve learned Hotwife play can truly become just as dangerously addictive as drugs, gambling, and alcohol!

So we slowly learned to let go!
This forum is amazing as we have many old time friends here… but that needed to stop also!
This forum just fed my addition!
Reading the words from others just enabled my desire for the delicious torment Hotwife men experience!

Covid helped to make the decision to stop a little easier!

And then there was my wife and her feelings that truly was the center of attention,
I was manipulating her and she knew it!
It wasn’t fair to her!

Her devotion to this marriage is the greatest gifts a man can receive from his wife!

It was time to focus on the marriage and nurture the love we have for each other!

Now with this change, our sex love definitely became boring with a lack of excitement and energy!
The passion… the mechanisms that fueled the mind blowing orgasm…. The animalistic urges… all were missing from
My love making!

We adapted though!
Our love for each other continued to grow.
We became closer as best friends and life partners… but grew further apart as lovers.

I’d make excuses… informing her that i am
Changing as a man… growing older and losing some of my sex drive! I actually thought it was true until this past week after mrs Reese started her new FWB (for now) relationship.

Not that it matters but I’ve had 9 orgasms over the past 3 days..: talk about soreness…. Omg! Yes, if you’re wondering, the last 6-7 didn’t produce much fluid lol!

We have had some of the most meaningful sex in years!
The passion, the crazy urges of oral sex…Make out with the deepest kisses…deep penetration… her orgasms came back!!!

On a side note… her fuck buddy… I know his name is jeff… his cock is wider than mine… I am a (c) but she also informed me that I much longer! Yes it matters at times because I don’t enjoy the cuckold role anymore!
She had this spot inside her … if a penis is long enough it’ll touch that place that makes her orgasm many times… she informed me that he didn’t touch it. She said she may not experience an orgasm because he isn’t long enough!
We will see I guess!

So what do you all think?
I need to get to work!
I promise to reach out more on the forum to read what ms Reese is writing!

One last thought..: if anyone is wondering, i have reprogrammed myself and have learned compartmentalization,l; which controls the addiction.

For now ….it’s under control!
But I will say that during those 3 days… Saturday till this past Tuesday…. All those feelings of addiction and obsession came back to me! I kept them under control but it was terrifyingly difficult!

I promised my wife that I will be controlled this time.

So far so good!

I’m not obsessive with her text messages to jeff…asking her what was going on between them during conversations.

The only agreement we have is that she will send me screenshots of text messages as she promised and she’s been doing that so far.

This treat from my wife as allowed me to process everything that is happening right now in a silent way.

Whosbeensleeping · Unread post by **Whosbeensleeping** » Thu Dec 01, 2022 6:16 am

Sounds like progress worthy of being celebrated. Glad you have placed respect for her in front of your own needs. Ultimately it's only you who is responsible for those.

Unread post by **mrs_reese** » Thu Dec 01, 2022 7:19 am

Welcome back my husband. Xoxo
Your post was everything we have discussed.
I love you so much!
Your going out with the boys tonight, I will be leaving around 8pm to meet jeff at his house.
Tonite we talk about how he and I will proceed in the future, you know I want him exclusive so we don’t have to worry about other issues.

Make sure your home around 11:30 so you can have me!
I hope you don’t mind reclaiming me.

regular3 · Unread post by **regular3** » Thu Dec 01, 2022 11:41 am

Boy is there a fire burning here tonight.
Have fun you two.

Unread post by **mrs_reese** » Thu Dec 01, 2022 2:31 pm

regular3 wrote: ↑
Thu Dec 01, 2022 11:41 am
Boy is there a fire burning here tonight.
Have fun you two.

I can’t wait to have jeff inside of me

zorro · Unread post by **zorro** » Thu Dec 01, 2022 3:42 pm

Thank you for your candid story of getting off track and then course correcting -- at least so far. Your open self-honesty will hopefully educate others here of the pitfalls this LS can bring and help them find a better way if they also get into trouble with it.

Mack555 · Unread post by **Mack555** » Fri Dec 02, 2022 3:45 am

Mrs Reese, i havent posted here before. Ive read up your thread earlier this year trying to catch up to the end so that i could post properly,by knowing what was going on. I was disappointed to find that you had stopped posting.I wanted to say that your postings from before were amazing and reveting. I know you hubby was pushing to hard, but overall he loves you and wants the best for you , he just needs to give you plenty of space . Free range so to speak. I hope you continue on your Hot wife path and keep your fan base enthralled. PS now i have to reread to freshen up on things ? Enjoy yourself Mrs Reese. Your fan Mack555

54321 · Unread post by **54321** » Fri Dec 02, 2022 6:04 am

... I’d like to use the example of when somebody is on again off again when they wanna have a workout routine or exercise They take a break and I just don’t feel motivated to work out anymore and then after a while they look in the mirror and they realize they need to work on their body or their appearance and they start working out or there’s a vacation to go on and you work out the same thing with hot wife play for me I hope that helps

I think every fabulous, chic, beautiful woman needs an adoring husband to worship her, make love with her and share the deepest intimacies, and a select stable of lovers to give her the thrills, excitement, novelty and variety necessary to keep her in prime condition and 'date hot'.

I've told my wife this a few times but she just laughs and tells me I'm crazy. Ah well

54321

Unread post by **mrs_reese** » Fri Dec 02, 2022 7:01 am

54321 wrote: ↑
Fri Dec 02, 2022 6:04 am

... I’d like to use the example of when somebody is on again off again when they wanna have a workout routine or exercise They take a break and I just don’t feel motivated to work out anymore and then after a while they look in the mirror and they realize they need to work on their body or their appearance and they start working out or there’s a vacation to go on and you work out the same thing with hot wife play for me I hope that helps
I think every fabulous, chic, beautiful woman needs an adoring husband to worship her, make love with her and share the deepest intimacies, and a select stable of lovers to give her the thrills, excitement, novelty and variety necessary to keep her in prime condition and 'date hot'.

I've told my wife this a few times but she just laughs and tells me I'm crazy. Ah well

54321

Yes 54321, yes! Now trying to have a women understand a man’s mind is one of the must difficult parts of this LS

Unread post by **mrs_reese** » Fri Dec 02, 2022 7:02 am

zorro wrote: ↑
Thu Dec 01, 2022 3:42 pm
Thank you for your candid story of getting off track and then course correcting -- at least so far. Your open self-honesty will hopefully educate others here of the pitfalls this LS can bring and help them find a better way if they also get into trouble with it.

Your welcome zorro

Unread post by **mrs_reese** » Fri Dec 02, 2022 7:03 am

Whosbeensleeping wrote: ↑
Thu Dec 01, 2022 6:16 am
Sounds like progress worthy of being celebrated. Glad you have placed respect for her in front of your own needs. Ultimately it's only you who is responsible for those.

Yes I think hubby would a finally understands after 14 years

Unread post by **mrs_reese** » Fri Dec 02, 2022 7:10 am

Hi everybody, I want to give an update about Jeff. I’m learning that he’s kind of freaked out about all this and I need to help him understand what my intentions are.

He’s been in a long-term relationship and found his girlfriend in bed with another man a few years ago and I think he’s jaded, and possibly very confused about what is considered cheating or affair or alternative lifestyle play.

That in mind, he was supposed to text me between eight and nine, as I was waiting for his message, I went to a bar restaurant and met hubby who was with some friends
while waiting for Jeff to contact me a little bit.

I know he was in the restaurant area and he saw me and he never texted, later this morning he mentioned to me in a text that it look like I was having fun and he didn’t wanna disturb me. Omg! Seriously?

Mind you, I was pretty upset and I said “what do you want me to do I’m waiting for you to text me” so I went to visit my husband while waiting for you!

I’m finally understanding that I need to help him understand what’s going on with me and hubby.

I’m going to keep it nice and simple for him as I will tell him that my husband and I tried threesomes and we didn’t like it so we made an agreement that we have an open relationship but we don’t share who we are sleeping with to each other.

I sense that he needs to understand that husband will not be a threat and that both he and I enjoy having the freedom to be with whom we choose to be with.

This is sounding like a work in progress for us, but it will work. I know he wants to be with me.

But I would like to include that last night, hubby and I had amazing sex. That Passion that has been missing for a few years it’s back.

As hubby was making love to me. I was crying a few times as I was orgasming telling him how much I love him.

Unread post by **mrs_reese** » Fri Dec 02, 2022 12:07 pm

Update, we spoke!
He was sorry, he said he didn’t want me to have to walk away from hubby when I was with him at the bar!
He said I was having a good time!

He’s got a lot to learn!
To be continued.

zorro · Unread post by **zorro** » Fri Dec 02, 2022 1:57 pm

This is heady stuff we (as in OHW) are into. Unsurprisingly, mistakes get made and others have trouble understanding it.
Reese, again I praise you for growing on the journey. And Mrs. Reese, you are well qualified to help Jeff understand how approaches other than the standard marital sexual playbook can work to intensify and enrich a marriage.

I feel for Jeff. He was betrayed by his past girlfriend, so he feels the pain when sex with others is dissociated from loving. She emotionally abandoned him, likely murdering the relationship. From that vantage point, he has some distance to go to understand how you can love your husband yet openly have other men: To have sex with others that does not involve betrayal. You might in time lead him into a wonderful different world, but it will not be fast or easy.

Your account has always been arousing and illuminating. Looking forward to hearing more about where you go.