I'm very much into the fantasy of wife sharing, and the real thing for others, but I'm much less certain about myself. The reality of it is very anxiety-inducing. I've never been the most confident person, nor the most attractive, so there's a lot of self-doubt and fear that she might find someone more satisfactory in bed, or that she'll prefer to be around. I think that's why my wife sharing fantasies are closer to hotwifing than cuckolding. Fantasy-wise, my "center" is a loving and completely devoted wife for whom sex with other men happens to be her hobby. Stuff like her having lots of male friends with whom she does normal friend stuff, and also fucks them, but in a clearly defined and understood-by-both-parties "we are just friends that happen to bump uglies" capacity.hubudig2 wrote: ↑Tue Nov 21, 2023 9:17 amMaybe you consider the idea "interesting" or maybe find it hot when it's someone else but not for yourself?
Maybe you're "in denial"? Whether you'd admit to it or not.
Maybe you are "into it" but have never admitted it to anyone? Or don't think it'd be worth posting about?
However you justify it, I'd be interested to hear your perspective on it.
How did you become interested in it? Why would you say you aren't actually into the idea?
In the real world, there's a lot more "playing with fire" that mutes the appeal. Plus, we have a kid together, and that makes it even more riskier. I'd prefer not to inadvertently give my kid a split home because she fell in love with another guy or just huge dicks in general. I could potentially get behind something like my wife having a hall pass when traveling, where there's not an opportunity to catch feelings (and with friends and such ruled out as well), but I'm not there yet. On the other hand, both my wife and I are in our back-40s, so I am also aware that we're not getting any younger.
I haven't shared any of this fantasy with her, not because she'd be disgusted, but because I don't even want to plant that seed in her head while I'm unsure of it. For now, this is just my private internal fantasy. (To be fair, I have a lot of private internal fantasies and fantasy subjects I don't share with my wife.) She has said some things in the past that suggest she be open to the concept of involving other people as a one-off, but that's probably going back a decade or more ago, so I have no idea what her feelings are on it now.
(Incidentally, with respect to cuckolding, I seem have a strain of Schrodinger's Cuckold. I love the stories of girlfriends and wives with other men, where the men are exclusive and the ladies are very not, but every time I listen to somebody like Venus Cuckoldress describe what an amazing gift cuckolding is for the woman, and how amazing a man you must be to bless this lifestyle for your wife, I can't help but think that if the gift is so wonderful, why does only the woman get to experience it? Why does the man not get the same blessing in return? It's like some weird FOMO. Then I happily come back here, primarily to the cuckold forum, and seek out videos of women cuckolding their men while the men just have to watch and deal with it, so I clearly don't have a consistent set of feelings on this.)
As to where it comes from, I think the seed of the interest was planted the moment I discovered porn. I didn't have my first girlfriend until after college, and she was my first everything, so until then the only outlet was porn. Soaking your teenaged brain in years and years of watching women you lust over fuck other people, and reading stories about women fucking other people. By the law of averages some of those videos, pictures, and stories inevitably involve horny girlfriends or wives with varying degrees of spousal approval for their actions but almost invariably end up getting turned on by what their wife is doing (or, at least, not turned off). Porn where the husband or boyfriend happily lets their girl fuck another guy and/or watching while they do it. Porn where the girl cheats on her guy, and the guy is aroused in spite of being upset about being cheated on. All of those things pried open the doors that lead the mind beyond the idea of strict monogamy.
I have had a couple of brushes with this lifestyle, both through that same girlfriend. Towards the end of that first relationship, my girlfriend confessed that she was having feelings for another guy. I offered to let her see him while she was still with me, knowing full well that it wouldn't be more than a date or two before they started to fool around sexually (she was pretty great in that regard). She declined, and subsequently broke up with me to date him, but I distinctly remember that while the idea of her liking another guy more than me was really terrifying, the idea of her having sex with someone else was very arousing. (Boy, I wonder where my IRL fears come from? )
After a couple of years went by, I reconnected with her for a great summer of casual sex (she had no boyfriend at the time) and even after that ended, we stayed close for a long while. She got married (not to the guy she broke up with me for), and later confessed to me that she and her husband would meet up with other couples for the purpose of getting high and swinging together.
Eventually, late one Saturday afternoon she called me, and extended an impromptu invite to join her and her husband for an MDMA-assisted threesome, with the condition that her husband expected me to pay attention to him too. I wish I could say that it was the highlight of my sexual life, but sadly, it was a pretty big embarrassment on my part. That night, despite giving it the ol' college try, I learned that I am not the least bit inclined towards sex with men. On top of that, the MDMA did not give me a reservoir of unlimited energy, in fact doing just the opposite. I ended up falling asleep on them before we had gotten very far into our shared sexual shenanigans. I did regain limited consciousness that night to the loud sounds of her and her husband fucking, and I desperately wish I had had enough cognitive functioning to open my eyes and watch them, but I ended up just falling back asleep. I can't remember the exact sounds they were making, but I have vague memories, and even to this day just knowing that they were fucking in front of me gets me going -- it's easily my biggest sexual regret that I never got to see her getting fucked by someone other than me.
I never got another invite again, for obvious reasons, and a couple of years later she and her husband broke up when she no longer had the interest in drug-fueled swinging any more, but he simply couldn't let it go.