Not the same after watching

[Yaosboni]

Hello guys, a bit too much for a first post, probably, but long story short-wife hooked up with a guy we found from swinger friends. We were both up for it, she was actually very turned on, he came to our house after we chatted for a bit a few days ago, we talked a little and my wife decided to offer herself. We all went to the bedroom and stuff started getting steamy, I really wasn’t prepared for what I was about to watch. I felt my stomach ache and I felt anxious yet a little aroused too. But they were at it like I wasn’t there. A few days ago and I still feel that was a hit on my mental, I don’t “hate” it, it was just a little overwhelming and I just don’t know how to feel about a lot of things. Some parts of the act are forever imprinted in my mind

[armyguyot1]

Welcome to the forum Yasboni.

[johncitizen69]

You are probably in the best place here in this forum after your experience. You'll find lots of support from many of us here, including myself. Personally, I think all should be ok, just the shock of it all still needs to settle in. Nevertheless, don't give up on your girl as you may find you just experienced what some of us might say is the best moment in your life.

[funfortwo]

Hello Yaosboni,
We've been in a hotwife dynamic for almost two years. Initially, I was all for it and it took almost 10 years for us to finally agree to move forward. We had some struggles initially, and I totally was in a bad space. It took time and a lot of communication between my wife and I to move past it. In her words, "this was your idea, if you want to stop...I'm okay with that. I want you to think about it because it may never happen again if we stop. You're my number one guy, I love you with all my heart....but I don't want the swing in emotions. Take some time and think about it..." I thought about it for a while and we had A LOT of discussions. I felt that was an important time in our process as we've taken off and haven't looked back. That's just my experience, but you have to draw your own conclusions.

[Treat yourself girl]

Hello guys, a bit too much for a first post, probably, but long story short-wife hooked up with a guy we found from swinger friends. We were both up for it, she was actually very turned on, he came to our house after we chatted for a bit a few days ago, we talked a little and my wife decided to offer herself. We all went to the bedroom and stuff started getting steamy, I really wasn’t prepared for what I was about to watch. I felt my stomach ache and I felt anxious yet a little aroused too. But they were at it like I wasn’t there. A few days ago and I still feel that was a hit on my mental, I don’t “hate” it, it was just a little overwhelming and I just don’t know how to feel about a lot of things. Some parts of the act are forever imprinted in my mind

So, you were really up for having your gal become a hotwife, but seeing her getting fucked... and enjoying it hasn't been as good as the fantasy.

Maybe her bull fucked her better than you can? Maybe your gal was really turned on at fulfilling YOUR fantasy for you? Perhaps it was this that made her really get into her bull... making you feel neglected... when really she was fucking him for your pleasure?

You say part of you was still aroused... how about next time you leave them alone and don't watch?

When Amy first became a Hotwife I was always in the room. I never had the bad feelings you have though... just super turned on. But as time went on I became happy to let her fly solo, and to be honest I find that even more arousing... thinking about what she's up to... hoping she's loving it... and getting the details when she gets home leads to the most amazing reclaim fucks.

Don't give up. Talk to each other and make some adjustments.

[54321]

You and your wife need to spend time coming to terms with this new development.
Are you both OK?
Is your relationship still OK?
Do you still love each other?
Are you still best friends?
Do you still want to go through life's adventures and grow old together?
Do you still want to make love with each other?
Are you still each other's number one?
How do you both feel?

I'm sure you can think of many more questions.
Take your time. Let the waters settle.
An experience like that can be wonderfully exciting or horribly terrifying or both at the same time.

Take your time.

Every good wish,

54321

[AHDog]

Wow, just watching the first time would be overwhelming for anybody. Just try to remember that her feelings are going to be up in the air too, and try to reconnect with her on whatever level she needs you on.

[athlete915]

Hello Yaosboni,
We've been in a hotwife dynamic for almost two years. Initially, I was all for it and it took almost 10 years for us to finally agree to move forward. We had some struggles initially, and I totally was in a bad space. It took time and a lot of communication between my wife and I to move past it. In her words, "this was your idea, if you want to stop...I'm okay with that. I want you to think about it because it may never happen again if we stop. You're my number one guy, I love you with all my heart....but I don't want the swing in emotions. Take some time and think about it..." I thought about it for a while and we had A LOT of discussions. I felt that was an important time in our process as we've taken off and haven't looked back. That's just my experience, but you have to draw your own conclusions.

Thank you for sharing this. I think it is great for Yaosboni and others to get to hear this kind of perspective.

Every time I've been with a new couple, the husbands have had some level of mixed feelings. Even experienced cuckolds can. While a lot of that needs to be dealt with between the husband and wife, I also feel like I have a responsibility to help mentor them through the experience. Some of that is just simply encouraging them to talk. There's also offering the cucks perspective, such as pointing out that just because their wives enjoy me sexually, doesn't mean that it changes how she feels about him as her husband (just like when your wife reminded you that you're her number one). Sometimes, it is telling the cucks about my experiences with other couples and how some of those cucks had the same struggles (it's nice to be reminded that you're not alone).

If you don't mind me asking, what were your struggles mostly related to?

[funfortwo]

Hello Yaosboni,
We've been in a hotwife dynamic for almost two years. Initially, I was all for it and it took almost 10 years for us to finally agree to move forward. We had some struggles initially, and I totally was in a bad space. It took time and a lot of communication between my wife and I to move past it. In her words, "this was your idea, if you want to stop...I'm okay with that. I want you to think about it because it may never happen again if we stop. You're my number one guy, I love you with all my heart....but I don't want the swing in emotions. Take some time and think about it..." I thought about it for a while and we had A LOT of discussions. I felt that was an important time in our process as we've taken off and haven't looked back. That's just my experience, but you have to draw your own conclusions.

Thank you for sharing this. I think it is great for Yaosboni and others to get to hear this kind of perspective.

Every time I've been with a new couple, the husbands have had some level of mixed feelings. Even experienced cuckolds can. While a lot of that needs to be dealt with between the husband and wife, I also feel like I have a responsibility to help mentor them through the experience. Some of that is just simply encouraging them to talk. There's also offering the cucks perspective, such as pointing out that just because their wives enjoy me sexually, doesn't mean that it changes how she feels about him as her husband (just like when your wife reminded you that you're her number one). Sometimes, it is telling the cucks about my experiences with other couples and how some of those cucks had the same struggles (it's nice to be reminded that you're not alone).

If you don't mind me asking, what were your struggles mostly related to?

I would say that after the angst wore off, I needed time to process everything. Initially, they saw each other about 7-9 times in two months. I needed it to slow down a bit in the beginning and thought "maybe" she was developing feelings for him, or that I wasn't her number one anymore. After a few weeks away, and A LOT of discussions, I came to realize we have a life together and a (good) man can't replace me in that short of a time. We had a great relationship entering into the LS, and it only got better through open and honest communication. I'm not threatened by him, and he is a great guy that treats my wife (and me) with respect. Nowadays, she gets "giddy" when her date is approaching, and I relish the fact that she is excited....because quite honestly, when she is excited, I get excited. I think it's called compersion? She had plans for a date with him tomorrow, but yesterday he cancelled because of work commitments. I asked her, who do you think is more disappointed, you or me? She said, I think I am....I get both of you and you only get me after he is done....The plan is for her to have a sleepover in February for their 2 year anniversary and his birthday. In the beginning of this dynamic, I would have never done that. In her words, it would be better to have some time to hang out and not just rush in/out of a hotel over 4-5 hours monthly. We shall see how things progress...but we love the ride.

[tiedyeHotwife]

My husband describes a process of focusing on the things that are sexy, just so the overall the experience is 5% hotter than it is angsty.
He says it actually take a lot of mental effort to stay in that place but overtime, the angst fades and the sexy memories actually amplify.

I play solo but one time my BF took a video. I guess he was inspired to perform more for the camera.
We had never done any bondage before so it was a surprise when he tied my hands to the headboard, and breathtakeing when he tied my knees to the headboard also.
He fucked me relentlessly in that position. I made sounds I didn't know I was capable of. He came in me repeatedly and I squirted so high, (never before).

My BF posted the video on Erom and sent my husband a link without me knowing. (they had previously talked about doing something like that).
Husband said it was the toughest test on this HW path. "its the hottest thing I've ever seen - and crushingly painful to see my wife lose it like that".
A month later, he did his 5% hotter process and its now our favorite experience.

DM me if you are really struggling. I can put you in touch with my husband if that might help.

[Bbw_cuck_watcher]

Hello guys, a bit too much for a first post, probably, but long story short-wife hooked up with a guy we found from swinger friends. We were both up for it, she was actually very turned on, he came to our house after we chatted for a bit a few days ago, we talked a little and my wife decided to offer herself. We all went to the bedroom and stuff started getting steamy, I really wasn’t prepared for what I was about to watch. I felt my stomach ache and I felt anxious yet a little aroused too. But they were at it like I wasn’t there. A few days ago and I still feel that was a hit on my mental, I don’t “hate” it, it was just a little overwhelming and I just don’t know how to feel about a lot of things. Some parts of the act are forever imprinted in my mind

I think the first time is almost always more shocking than you expect. Big difference between dreaming about it and having it happen right in front of you. It’s how you deal with those feelings, both mentally and sexually that will determine if you try it again. For me it was easier as we had many encounters where I shared her as part of threesomes with another guy. So well before she did it without me playing too I had seen her with plenty guys, but I was also having sec with her at the same time.

[SteelRidge]

Hello guys, a bit too much for a first post, probably, but long story short-wife hooked up with a guy we found from swinger friends. We were both up for it, she was actually very turned on, he came to our house after we chatted for a bit a few days ago, we talked a little and my wife decided to offer herself. We all went to the bedroom and stuff started getting steamy, I really wasn’t prepared for what I was about to watch. I felt my stomach ache and I felt anxious yet a little aroused too. But they were at it like I wasn’t there. A few days ago and I still feel that was a hit on my mental, I don’t “hate” it, it was just a little overwhelming and I just don’t know how to feel about a lot of things. Some parts of the act are forever imprinted in my mind

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My wife said she wanted to go solo, so I agreed. After her fucking a guy 4 separate times things eventually went sideways with her catching feelings for him. I told her that probably I should've been there and I could've participated some and maybe that would've helped her not to catch feelings. She said "nope, you wouldn't have liked it" implying I would've been invisible as her guy railed her over and over for hours with her not even giving me any thought. Also I know there was some pillow talk so there was some cuddle sessions between the sex.

I imagine I would've ended up or stayed in the living room jacking off to a permanent boner while listening to all the moaning, squealing, grunting and other fuck noises coming out of the bedroom. Then I would've got anxious as things quieted down except for the occasional giggle prompting me to see what's up only to see them cuddling and talking in low voices. Still gets me hard thinking about it though.