Restart?

[loving_hubby]

Hello all,
I was a user some years back. Our first go around with the lifestyle was fun at first. Then wife felt like she wasn't getting treated how she wanted to be so everything came to a halt. I didn't broach the subject again since she was not interested in pursuing that path again. Couple of months ago, she decided to see what her interests were sexually. Which pretty much led back to her interest with other men. I did not want to see to over enthusiastic so I played it cool and supported her curiosity.

Fast forward to now. She has found someone that interests her and treats her how she wanted to be treated our first time around. It is an online relationship so far. He respects our marriage and respects her as a lady. Something the men in the past could learn a lesson or two.

We have had talks about what's expected of everyone and I think we're in a better head space than the past. We'll see where it goes but we're all excited about the future possibilities.

Thank you

[venus-can99]

Welcome… looking forward to hearing all about your hw 2.0 experiences

[snoogaloo82]

Hello all,
I was a user some years back. Our first go around with the lifestyle was fun at first. Then wife felt like she wasn't getting treated how she wanted to be so everything came to a halt. I didn't broach the subject again since she was not interested in pursuing that path again. Couple of months ago, she decided to see what her interests were sexually. Which pretty much led back to her interest with other men. I did not want to see to over enthusiastic so I played it cool and supported her curiosity.

Fast forward to now. She has found someone that interests her and treats her how she wanted to be treated our first time around. It is an online relationship so far. He respects our marriage and respects her as a lady. Something the men in the past could learn a lesson or two.

We have had talks about what's expected of everyone and I think we're in a better head space than the past. We'll see where it goes but we're all excited about the future possibilities.

Thank you

definitely keep us up to date on what happens. i'm interested because my sweetie and i went through a horrible time and she didn't feel she was being treated the way she thought she should be treated. wishing you two all my best!
rik

[loving_hubby]

Hello all,
I was a user some years back. Our first go around with the lifestyle was fun at first. Then wife felt like she wasn't getting treated how she wanted to be so everything came to a halt. I didn't broach the subject again since she was not interested in pursuing that path again. Couple of months ago, she decided to see what her interests were sexually. Which pretty much led back to her interest with other men. I did not want to see to over enthusiastic so I played it cool and supported her curiosity.

Fast forward to now. She has found someone that interests her and treats her how she wanted to be treated our first time around. It is an online relationship so far. He respects our marriage and respects her as a lady. Something the men in the past could learn a lesson or two.

We have had talks about what's expected of everyone and I think we're in a better head space than the past. We'll see where it goes but we're all excited about the future possibilities.

Thank you

definitely keep us up to date on what happens. i'm interested because my sweetie and i went through a horrible time and she didn't feel she was being treated the way she thought she should be treated. wishing you two all my best!
rik

Will do! I'm sorry your S/O was treated poorly. There's no room for that. To try and avoid that, wifey is making clear what she wants and expects. What I told her is that "she drives the bus. These dudes are all just passengers. You pick the stops and destinations, not them." I'll probably create a thread in the Stag/Vixen area for updates. Thanks for taking interest!

[athlete915]

Your story is a sad reminder that manners still matter regardless of the setting. For whatever reason, men are particularly prone to forget that when sex is involved. No matter how good the sex is, a couple will eventually show you the door if you don't know how to behave.

Additionally, a lot of men confuse being a jerk with being dominant. To me, it is the opposite. It shows a lack of confidence and maturity.

Aside from my upbringing, the fact that my first two couples were friends first and then developed into long-term, steady relationships between us reinforced that my behavior outside the bedroom mattered to what happened inside of it.

Anyway, that's a long way of saying that I'm sorry that your first experience didn't go well and that the guy screwed up a good thing. I'm glad you two are willing to give it another try, and I wish you better luck. Not every guy out there is a jerk, so don't waste your time on those who are.

[trecital]

.....a lot of men confuse being a jerk with being dominant. To me, it is the opposite. It shows a lack of confidence and maturity.

Agreed.

Not every guy out there is a jerk, so don't waste your time on those who are.

Set some rules on behaviour, right from the beginning. If he can't abide by those rules, politely show him the exit.
There are plenty of other men to choose from.

[loving_hubby]

Your story is a sad reminder that manners still matter regardless of the setting. For whatever reason, men are particularly prone to forget that when sex is involved. No matter how good the sex is, a couple will eventually show you the door if you don't know how to behave.

Additionally, a lot of men confuse being a jerk with being dominant. To me, it is the opposite. It shows a lack of confidence and maturity.

Aside from my upbringing, the fact that my first two couples were friends first and then developed into long-term, steady relationships between us reinforced that my behavior outside the bedroom mattered to what happened inside of it.

Anyway, that's a long way of saying that I'm sorry that your first experience didn't go well and that the guy screwed up a good thing. I'm glad you two are willing to give it another try, and I wish you better luck. Not every guy out there is a jerk, so don't waste your time on those who are.

Hello! Appreciate your thoughts. It was actually more than one, it was pretty much the whole barrel of men she met with. We brought it up again the other day in conversation. Half were friends of friends type of deals. The biggest flaw they showed were confessing that they'd met her sooner or before me. We laughed about it and said without me they wouldn't have even known her! Since I'm a part of her freedom to indulge, she gets to live that part of her laugh.

We're hoping we're better off with the knowledge we have now. Speaking into the void, but when a wife mentions small dates, at least treat her to a coffee outing for pete's sake.

[loving_hubby]

.....a lot of men confuse being a jerk with being dominant. To me, it is the opposite. It shows a lack of confidence and maturity.

Agreed.

Not every guy out there is a jerk, so don't waste your time on those who are.

Set some rules on behaviour, right from the beginning. If he can't abide by those rules, politely show him the exit.
There are plenty of other men to choose from.

We are definitely putting more communication out there. Even between ourselves. Addressing issues asap even if it's a simple question on a light subject. Kinda clear the inbox before it stacks up.

We are hopeful for finding those men that are appreciative and worthy of her time. So far, she may have found at least one so... crossing fingers.