Ok so if you saw my post in the new member forum you might know a bit but here’s the cliffsnotes.
My husband has approached me a few times about hotwifing and we’ve talked about things but I’m not ready to go on any dates. My husband has been my only sexual partner and I’m a BBW who is getting up in the age department (40). Never had anyone exactly stumbling to get to me when I was younger. Nervous I wouldn’t find anyone anyway (I can’t give head either like…physically).
We found a middle ground in the past where I post pics (usually on reddit) and chatted with a few guys but the chats were often impersonal and predictable. We stopped for a while but he and I have talked about trying that again to help get my confidence up (and he gets to hear about it all- win win).
But I don’t really know how successful it will be. Reddit posting is a sea of people plugging onlyfans and burner accounts.
I’m not ready to date though.
Any advice?
Still figuring things out
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CuriouserNCuriouser
- Prepubescent
- Posts: 5
- Joined: Sat Feb 01, 2025 7:18 pm
Still figuring things out
~Curiouser and curiouser
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Pufferfish
- Player
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- Joined: Wed Feb 22, 2023 8:19 pm
- Location: Pacific Northwest
Re: Still figuring things out
My advice is to contact the moderators and get verified so as to get access to the female only section of the forum and discuss it more with other hotwives who maybe can help walk you through your feelings and thoughts a bit better.
All of our wives have self esteem or body image issues, so that isn't uncommon, most all of them eventually discover they are a lot more desirable than they believe themselves to be. It's not difficult to find a guy who is up for the task, it's more difficult to find one who you are also really into. Probably over half of the guys my wife has chatted with and was going to meet were just flakes who just wanted to flirt/chat and never actually showed up to meet in person, so the internet in general is a sea of burner accounts not just Reddit.
Taking steps in this direction. Chatting with guys online and in person. Going on a 1st date (no sex just coffee and maybe a kiss). And that sort of thing did wonders for my wife's self image, even with a lot of guys turning out to be fakes. So I think there's no better advice than to simply start small and venture out and try some stuff. If you don't want to take things further that's ok. But you probably will once things start moving in that direction and you talk about things with your husband. Even though you say you're not ready to date, I think by the time you get to it you will it actually takes a bit of work to get to the 1st date part. So I'd set a goal of that 1st date, and know that as far as you're willing to take it is the first date and kissing. Once you reach that goal let us know how you feel.
All of our wives have self esteem or body image issues, so that isn't uncommon, most all of them eventually discover they are a lot more desirable than they believe themselves to be. It's not difficult to find a guy who is up for the task, it's more difficult to find one who you are also really into. Probably over half of the guys my wife has chatted with and was going to meet were just flakes who just wanted to flirt/chat and never actually showed up to meet in person, so the internet in general is a sea of burner accounts not just Reddit.
Taking steps in this direction. Chatting with guys online and in person. Going on a 1st date (no sex just coffee and maybe a kiss). And that sort of thing did wonders for my wife's self image, even with a lot of guys turning out to be fakes. So I think there's no better advice than to simply start small and venture out and try some stuff. If you don't want to take things further that's ok. But you probably will once things start moving in that direction and you talk about things with your husband. Even though you say you're not ready to date, I think by the time you get to it you will it actually takes a bit of work to get to the 1st date part. So I'd set a goal of that 1st date, and know that as far as you're willing to take it is the first date and kissing. Once you reach that goal let us know how you feel.
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Our story: viewtopic.php?f=5&t=62359#p1198704
Her pics: viewtopic.php?f=9&t=63848#p1229721
Our story: viewtopic.php?f=5&t=62359#p1198704
Her pics: viewtopic.php?f=9&t=63848#p1229721
Re: Still figuring things out
Hi! I am sure a lot of men would found you attractive! I think you don’t have to worry about not being sexy enough. The right guy will definitely find you insanely sexy!! Of course, if you do not want to do it, then it is okay to just keep it a fantasy. I also keep asking my wife to have a lover, but if she does not feel ready then I am fine. It is her choice. As a husband, I would like her to have more sex and be satisfied in love, but I go along with her decisions about this. I know she could enjoy sex, but things can get complicated and there are a lot to worry about. For us, a potential lover would probably be someone she is close to and has a crush on, so it is even more worrying to me.
Well, maybe you can just meet men around you for coffee, get a bit closer first. Then, go on a date when you feel like it, instead of meeting with a stranger for sex. I don’t know if you need to have feelings first, but I feel you need to feel safe and close before you can go ahead. I think it is a must for many women. My wife would probably choose a coworker, an ex-crush, or a friend first and then they could go on dates and ultimately to bed.
Well, maybe you can just meet men around you for coffee, get a bit closer first. Then, go on a date when you feel like it, instead of meeting with a stranger for sex. I don’t know if you need to have feelings first, but I feel you need to feel safe and close before you can go ahead. I think it is a must for many women. My wife would probably choose a coworker, an ex-crush, or a friend first and then they could go on dates and ultimately to bed.