I believe I know how I came to be this way. I have just average looks. I think many women would rate me as a 6, on a 1 to 10 point scale of attractiveness. I managed to do remarkably well, dating in college. I never did well picking girls up in the college bars, or getting phone numbers immediately, or having one night stands. I mostly dated girls who I got to know over time, in classes, or people I worked with at my part-time jobs.Zekemitchell wrote: ↑Wed Nov 06, 2024 3:30 pmAs the title states, one thing my mind constantly thinks about is why am I into being cucked? .....
.....Any ideas? Anyone like me?
I made up for my plain looks, by developing a good sense of humor, and catering to women, and developing an above average oral technique. I got a number of girlfriends, referred to me by sister friends, who had put me in the friend zone. I had some remarkable success at dating a few very beautiful girls, we were way out of my league. I sometimes experienced guys hitting on my girlfriend, right in front of me. I had some girlfriends who ended up breaking up with me, to go with some more macho guys. I started fantasizing sexually, and masturbating about the predatory guys who would go after my girlfriends, and the rejection, and imagining what my girlfriends sex life was like with the new guy.
I had just enough success from time to time, that instead of getting discouraged, I just would go out in search of my next girlfriend, and ask girls out. Each time I was without a girlfriend, I experienced quite a bit of rejection, before I would find the next one, who would give me a chance for a while.
I could really relate to Dana Garvey's and Mike Myers' characters, Wayne and Garth, on Saturday Night Live, and in Wayne's World. My response to the beautiful girls who would give me a chance, was to basically drop to my knees, bow at their feet, and say, "I'm not worthy! I'm not worthy! Tell me what I can do to serve you and please you. I will do anything to be your boyfriend. You deserve to be treated like a Goddess, and I am your slave!"
Some point in my dating career, I made it a point to deliberately ask girls out, who were absolutely, so clearly out of my league, that rejection was nearly certain. I began to find the rejection a turn on, and would go home later and masturbate, thinking about them, and imagining that they would let me be their house boy, taking advantage of my pathetic attraction to them.
I was attracted to a lot of smart independent feminist women, in college, in the '80s. They structured relationships, according to their needs and desires. I dated several women who told me that they were not interested in going steady, or being tied down as any guys "girlfriend." "Played the field, and dated at least a couple of us guys at once." Of course I accepted whatever relationship crumbs they would give me, because I knew that I was fortunate to have whatever time with them they were willing to grant me.
A couple of these women told me that they didn't really like intercourse. They preferred to let me pleasure them with my mouth, and then they would reward me with a handjob. Then, I would find out that they were having regular intercourse with their other boyfriend, and the real issue was that I was not very good at intercourse. They just told me they didn't care for it at all, so as not to hurt my feelings.
There were a couple of girls who spent their Friday and Saturday nights with the other guy, and Sunday evenings with me, when the other guy was busy with his buddies. I figured out that he was the primary boyfriend, and I was mostly a snuggle buddy. I accepted these arrangements, because I knew I was fortunate to have whatever time they would grant me.
Twice I dated girls who had a primary boyfriend. I would keep myself busy doing things on the Friday and Saturday nights that they were with their boyfriend. The one girl would spend most of Sunday morning and afternoon in the library, catching up on studying. Both of these girls let me do their laundry for them.
They would come to me Sunday evening for dinner, as I have always been a good cook. I would serve them a nice dinner, and present them with their laundry, with their jeans, bras, and panties neatly folded, and their dresses, skirts, and blouses on hangers. They would let me snuggle with them on the couch, while we watch the movie. Then at bedtime, they would let me pleasure them with my mouth, and they would reward me with a handjob.
It was one of those girls who ultimately recommended me to the woman who's now my wife. She told her that I was a sweet boy, who would do anything to make her happy. I pretty much just slipped into the same kind of relationship with my wife, that I had with her girlfriend who handed me off to her.
Just before dating me, my wife had dated a guy who was an athlete in high school and college. He was studying to become a sports psychologist. He is now a prominent psychologist with a couple of books published in his name. My wife said they had fun for a while, but she got tired of how pompous and self-centered he was. She says that she knew I would make a better husband and father. She still calls me her "sweet boy."
The other girl married a very Alpha male attorney who was very successful and became a top partner in his law firm. She has since divorced him and says that he's a real asshole.
I ran into her recently, after not hearing anything about her in years. She gave me a big hug and asked if my wife and I were still married. When I told her we are, she said that my wife is a lucky woman. She said, "I regret letting you get away. You're the guy I should have married."
I think this is how I became psychologically conditioned to be a submissive cuckold in service to women, and ultimately my wife.
