My gf is cucking me tonite

[FLR_fan]

92 missed calls so far. I don’t have the heart to block her though.

[FLR_fan]

Quick update - after hounding me like hell yday and then a humongous text back and forth and airing of grievances, I succumbed and we are going to be back together. 2 things she promises and which have been the bone of contention is that first she will completely block her ex, and second is that she will abstain from all mind altering stuff including vape, cbd and alcohol. She says she does not see a future without me. On an aside, maybe I will have to dial down my thoughts and just focus on relationship building. At the same time a part of me just yearns to admit all my fetishes/fantasies to her but I fear the backlash.

[Cuckcuckgoose1]

Hope you work things out with her. Best to put the hotwife stuff on hold until you both are in a better place. Good luck.

[elina]

Dear FLR fan

I appreciate how much you must love this Lady.
I hope everything will work out for both of you.
I still think you need to make efforts to support Her.
Even if She is serious and now truly wants to spend Her life with you, breaking a substance habitt is tough.
Have you discussed some kind of rehab with Her?

Good luck and sincere regards
elina

[FLR_fan]

Want to give a quick update to my brief uninteresting story. After a tumultuous last several weeks i think my gf has peaced out for good. I get the feeling I was just some kind of temp arrangement for her. Anyway she didnt leave before blowing thru my money last week including $1000+ lip fillers, $500 hair styling and color and $300 facial. Did she cuck me in the interim-it’s tough to say. She claims fidelity. But i dont know what to believe what she says. How do i feel- like a complete loser for sure. I think she moves out of towm to a different state this weekend. So i guess thats that. I blame myself - maybe i was not brave enough. But during spells of clarity, I feel I might have avoided a poisoned bullet. For what’s it worth she did tease me quite a bit on how guys always hit on her and are always trying to fuck her.

[elina]

Sorry to hear that.

No alternative but to face reality, take stock of you losses and move on.
At least it appears that you are now facing reality and recognize you must never let this girl back into your life again.

Sincely
elina

[FLR_fan]

Long standing update -

After a painful breakup last month, my ex moved out of state and found a new place about 3 or 4 state lines away from me. She claims to love it there, with a beachside locality and claims to have found a new job with double pay than her previous one. I am happy for her but also have stopped responding to her texts so as to allow myself to move on as I have had deep rooted feelings for her. In the midst of my attempts to heal, this week she just popped up at my place (I had ignored all her texts) and has stayed here the past 2 nights. I don’t have the heart to kick her out but have kept asking her as to why is she really here.

Anyway, with another fortuitous turn of events (is it really though?), she went to sleep tonite leaving the phone screen on playing a video in background (which is kind of her sleep routine). At first I resisted but eventually couldn’t help checking. An lo-and-behold all these lies and deceptions are back to the forefront. First off she seems to have ended up meeting one of her exes (this is younger and smoking hot per her description) yday afternoon using work meeting as an excuse. I am not categorically sure if they had sex or not (but would be highly likely imo). She has been particularly severe in belittling my child’s personality this time (whom she blames for the break up). Also on the texts -she asked another ex (the original sugar daddy this time) for more money tonight. Turns out her bank balance is in the negative per the screenshot. Also shared all kinds of negative stuff about me and my kid in her friends group chat. I also discovered that she never had any intention of staying long term where I live right now as she hates this particular state and its weather and people I feel. She is now trying to sell me a more- meet once in an awhile long distance relationship, which I have never been a fan of. The last time she did longer distance many years ago she ended up cucking me to the extreme, and never quite told me and kept me in the dark, until I discovered she was living with some other sugar daddy type guy for the past 2 years. And yes she reached out to her drug dealer for blue pills (after claiming to me that she stopped). Anyway I was not able to dig through any more as she woke up, but I bet there are far more scandalous stuff in there. Interestingly she did ask me in passing today if she can ask her ex (the one whom she met up) to hangout at my place as she needs someone to share her grief with all the mental torture I am inflicting on her (her words).

Anyway this prompted me to make a pros and cons list for her and thought exercise that I wanted to share. I am sorry, I do not mean to make this super long winded as I am a fan of brevity.

Pros
She is My type I feel
Can be very charming if she wants to
Great eyes, lips and good bod- all of those never hurt
Young and child bearing potemtial is a positive when looking to start a family
Crackerjack in bed
Does fill life w color/make it very very interesting


Cons
Compulsive liar
Con artist / hustler
Loves more for my money
Hates the person I love most (like my biological kid)
Divisive nature
Easily jealous or paranoid about stuff
Uses sex as a weapon
Still lagging back in maturity IMO
Continues prescription drug abuse
Plays everyone around for money
Has no filters/ socially inappropriate at times
Bipolar-ish personality
Doubt whether she genuinely cares for me
Tendency to cheat - which is very hurtful for the relationship
Trigger happy in spendings
Can’t hold a job
Vaping dependence
Marijuana use - not a good example with impressionable teen around the home I feel
Strong inclination to drink
Does not want to stay in my current geographical state - so this is temporary for her
Trying to freeload on vacations, is how it feels
At times makes me feel very miserable to the degree of crying
Perpetuates lies and falsehoods esp about me and my son
Discusses personal character and doesn’t hesitate to character assassinate in person
Personality not too far off from my mom or even my ex to a degree (and both are bad)
Long term risk for perpetual chaotic existence risk with her
Risk of effecting my job or even financial ruin
Most likely she just wants a sugar daddy type situation
Deep down maybe doesn’t respect me that much
Taking advantage of my loneliness and need for companionship
Her Poor sleep habits are not good for daily routine
She has not really been interested in cucking as a shared expensive, for example refused to lock me in a cock cage whenever I have requested

As much as painful it’s letting her go, long term this is not a prudent choice and would bring back a repeat of the chaotic existence that I previously had with ex, and which is not how I am. One cannot have a true relationship without honesty, transparency and, deep seated respect for one’s partner, which is clearly lacking now both ways in this relationship.

I can take solace in that I helped her in difficult times. Hopefully her life turns around and she finds profound success and happiness. I feel, she needs to chalk her own path and figure out and commit what she wants. Unfortunately, this won’t happen until she stops the very harmful habit of drug use and stop keeping asking everyone for money, rather than owning it.

To self I would say. - I am a lonely fool who has latched on to the one beautiful looking person who gives me an iota of attention and have been lying to myself and failed to recognize the fallibilities in this relationship. I need to be stronger and more wiser in choosing the correct partner to whom I can give all of that love that I have been wanting to share. I should look back fondly at whenever good times I had with her. Now is the time to refocus on work, being a good dad and maintaining physical health- which seem to be the 3 very important things for long term happiness. I have to trust the universe.

On the flip side - If i do choose to accept her as is and agree to stay with her- then probab she will lynch you for money, mentally effect my kid and try to sabotage my relationship with him and likely cheat/cuckold me for sure. I would have to accept all of that and more or less commit to an FLR type But tempestuous dynamic with a potential for a lot of mental abuse and torment on her part. From a fetish standpoint, although this may be very attractive and a huge turn on at times, I am not sure how it would feasibly workout long term and the risk of destruction/damage appears to be prohibitively high and probably not worth it. It’s probably better for me to try and re-wire my brain and not get that hung up or obsessed about fetishes that really seem good on paper but probably don’t work in real life, I feel.in all of this she still keeps claiming that she only love me and me only.

Anyway appreciate your patience reading through if you made it till here. Any words of wisdom or advise is much appreciated, as always.

[elina]

Dear FLR_fan

I think you have been through so much with this Lady that now is the time to stop clutching at straws and face the reality that you will never, ever be happy with Her.

If nothing else, I think you owe it to your son to just decively cut this Lady out now and refocus your life to see if you can find a Lady worthy of your love and devotion. For this particual ex to blame your son for anything just shows how immature and selfish She is.

Move on.

Sincerely
elina

[Long Lurker 34]

Dear FLR_fan

I think you have been through so much with this Lady that now is the time to stop clutching at straws and face the reality that you will never, ever be happy with Her.

If nothing else, I think you owe it to your son to just decively cut this Lady out now and refocus your life to see if you can find a Lady worthy of your love and devotion. For this particual ex to blame your son for anything just shows how immature and selfish She is.

Move on.

Sincerely
elina

FLR
- Second what elina said on steroids!
- Plus I would give her the boot immediately and make it perfectly clear she is not to contact you anymore.
- If she does get a restraining order.
- You may like or desire 'cucking' but what she does is way beyond what you should have to be putting up with, especially if as you mentioned she doesn't really care for you, let alone your child.

[Amayzed]

Dear FLR_fan,

I went through 13 years of what is probably a milder version of your girlfriend, including marriage for nearly the past four. We are now in the middle of a messy divorce where she is camped out in the home I own with a restraining order she got on false pretenses of me abusing her. Fortunately I am working with a couple of good lawyers to bring this slowly and systematically to an end.

It has taken me a long time to realize the truth in what has been said to me several times along the way:

They don't change

My to-be ex-wife unfortunately went through a verbally abusive childhood. Despite working courageously and diligently to understand and overcome the things that drive her the root behaviors remained. Without trying to be harsh or dramatic I'd describe her as having a sort of quasi-criminal personality that had me accepting and normalizing a lot of outrageous behaviors on her part.

The biggest red flag you mention is her being critical of your son. The paranoia my ex felt about my first wife and thus the two kids from that marriage was the straw that finally broke the camel's back.

You are wise in your ability to observe and reflect on what is going on. PM me if you want to hear more. But I think if you really listen to yourself as you have been doing you are already seeing the right answers.

All the best

[coastalkid]

Dear FLR_fan,

I went through 13 years of what is probably a milder version of your girlfriend, including marriage for nearly the past four. We are now in the middle of a messy divorce where she is camped out in the home I own with a restraining order she got on false pretenses of me abusing her. Fortunately I am working with a couple of good lawyers to bring this slowly and systematically to an end.

It has taken me a long time to realize the truth in what has been said to me several times along the way:

They don't change

My to-be ex-wife unfortunately went through a verbally abusive childhood. Despite working courageously and diligently to understand and overcome the things that drive her the root behaviors remained. Without trying to be harsh or dramatic I'd describe her as having a sort of quasi-criminal personality that had me accepting and normalizing a lot of outrageous behaviors on her part.

The biggest red flag you mention is her being critical of your son. The paranoia my ex felt about my first wife and thus the two kids from that marriage was the straw that finally broke the camel's back.

You are wise in your ability to observe and reflect on what is going on. PM me if you want to hear more. But I think if you really listen to yourself as you have been doing you are already seeing the right answers.

All the best

The part I highlighted in red is the "big deal". If she has placed blame on the son and said critical things out loud then it will take an awful lot of apologizing/explaining to EVER get FLR_fan to believe or trust her feelings towards his son. There will ALWAYS be a lingering doubt.

If FLR_fan really wants to be in an FLR relationship then he needs a partner he can have full faith in. He has to trust that whoever he enters into that lifestyle with will value his devotion and commitment by protecting him from all enemies, foreign and domestic. If there's the least bit of a notion that a wife would derive more pleasure from her husband's misery than she would his happiness then that leads to questioning every decision.

An FLR relationship doesn't mean a wife can ignore or neglect their partner. It's an exchange with lots of implication. In exchange for the power ceded to her she now assumes responsibility for his well being and happiness. She decides. That puts all the chips on her side of the table. Those decisions are hers to own along with the responsibility for any mistakes she makes in judgement.

Thinking about the whole FLR thing is interesting. I think it happens on millions of levels in monogamous and non-monogamous relationships. On this site it usually has sex in some form associated with it. In the regular monogamous world they call husbands/bfs, milquetoast, hen pecked or pussy whipped that have wives that make ALL the decisions. They just don't engage in non-monogamy. They deal out happiness and misery at their discretion.

The "non-monogamous" version of FLR can be good or bad just like the "monogamous". It really boils down to the leader. They can be a good leader or they can be a bad one.

[Midnight Joker]

Long standing update -

After a painful breakup last month, my ex moved out of state and found a new place about 3 or 4 state lines away from me. She claims to love it there, with a beachside locality and claims to have found a new job with double pay than her previous one. I am happy for her but also have stopped responding to her texts so as to allow myself to move on as I have had deep rooted feelings for her. In the midst of my attempts to heal, this week she just popped up at my place (I had ignored all her texts) and has stayed here the past 2 nights. I don’t have the heart to kick her out but have kept asking her as to why is she really here.

Anyway, with another fortuitous turn of events (is it really though?), she went to sleep tonite leaving the phone screen on playing a video in background (which is kind of her sleep routine). At first I resisted but eventually couldn’t help checking. An lo-and-behold all these lies and deceptions are back to the forefront. First off she seems to have ended up meeting one of her exes (this is younger and smoking hot per her description) yday afternoon using work meeting as an excuse. I am not categorically sure if they had sex or not (but would be highly likely imo). She has been particularly severe in belittling my child’s personality this time (whom she blames for the break up). Also on the texts -she asked another ex (the original sugar daddy this time) for more money tonight. Turns out her bank balance is in the negative per the screenshot. Also shared all kinds of negative stuff about me and my kid in her friends group chat. I also discovered that she never had any intention of staying long term where I live right now as she hates this particular state and its weather and people I feel. She is now trying to sell me a more- meet once in an awhile long distance relationship, which I have never been a fan of. The last time she did longer distance many years ago she ended up cucking me to the extreme, and never quite told me and kept me in the dark, until I discovered she was living with some other sugar daddy type guy for the past 2 years. And yes she reached out to her drug dealer for blue pills (after claiming to me that she stopped). Anyway I was not able to dig through any more as she woke up, but I bet there are far more scandalous stuff in there. Interestingly she did ask me in passing today if she can ask her ex (the one whom she met up) to hangout at my place as she needs someone to share her grief with all the mental torture I am inflicting on her (her words).

Anyway this prompted me to make a pros and cons list for her and thought exercise that I wanted to share. I am sorry, I do not mean to make this super long winded as I am a fan of brevity.

Pros
She is My type I feel
Can be very charming if she wants to
Great eyes, lips and good bod- all of those never hurt
Young and child bearing potemtial is a positive when looking to start a family
Crackerjack in bed
Does fill life w color/make it very very interesting


Cons
Compulsive liar
Con artist / hustler
Loves more for my money
Hates the person I love most (like my biological kid)
Divisive nature
Easily jealous or paranoid about stuff
Uses sex as a weapon
Still lagging back in maturity IMO
Continues prescription drug abuse
Plays everyone around for money
Has no filters/ socially inappropriate at times
Bipolar-ish personality
Doubt whether she genuinely cares for me
Tendency to cheat - which is very hurtful for the relationship
Trigger happy in spendings
Can’t hold a job
Vaping dependence
Marijuana use - not a good example with impressionable teen around the home I feel
Strong inclination to drink
Does not want to stay in my current geographical state - so this is temporary for her
Trying to freeload on vacations, is how it feels
At times makes me feel very miserable to the degree of crying
Perpetuates lies and falsehoods esp about me and my son
Discusses personal character and doesn’t hesitate to character assassinate in person
Personality not too far off from my mom or even my ex to a degree (and both are bad)
Long term risk for perpetual chaotic existence risk with her
Risk of effecting my job or even financial ruin
Most likely she just wants a sugar daddy type situation
Deep down maybe doesn’t respect me that much
Taking advantage of my loneliness and need for companionship
Her Poor sleep habits are not good for daily routine
She has not really been interested in cucking as a shared expensive, for example refused to lock me in a cock cage whenever I have requested

As much as painful it’s letting her go, long term this is not a prudent choice and would bring back a repeat of the chaotic existence that I previously had with ex, and which is not how I am. One cannot have a true relationship without honesty, transparency and, deep seated respect for one’s partner, which is clearly lacking now both ways in this relationship.

I can take solace in that I helped her in difficult times. Hopefully her life turns around and she finds profound success and happiness. I feel, she needs to chalk her own path and figure out and commit what she wants. Unfortunately, this won’t happen until she stops the very harmful habit of drug use and stop keeping asking everyone for money, rather than owning it.

To self I would say. - I am a lonely fool who has latched on to the one beautiful looking person who gives me an iota of attention and have been lying to myself and failed to recognize the fallibilities in this relationship. I need to be stronger and more wiser in choosing the correct partner to whom I can give all of that love that I have been wanting to share. I should look back fondly at whenever good times I had with her. Now is the time to refocus on work, being a good dad and maintaining physical health- which seem to be the 3 very important things for long term happiness. I have to trust the universe.

On the flip side - If i do choose to accept her as is and agree to stay with her- then probab she will lynch you for money, mentally effect my kid and try to sabotage my relationship with him and likely cheat/cuckold me for sure. I would have to accept all of that and more or less commit to an FLR type But tempestuous dynamic with a potential for a lot of mental abuse and torment on her part. From a fetish standpoint, although this may be very attractive and a huge turn on at times, I am not sure how it would feasibly workout long term and the risk of destruction/damage appears to be prohibitively high and probably not worth it. It’s probably better for me to try and re-wire my brain and not get that hung up or obsessed about fetishes that really seem good on paper but probably don’t work in real life, I feel.in all of this she still keeps claiming that she only love me and me only.

Anyway appreciate your patience reading through if you made it till here. Any words of wisdom or advise is much appreciated, as always.

The power of pussy is very strong. Glad to see you've broken her spell over you. She is evil and no matter what she offers, it will end up with you being broken...and broke.

[coastalkid]

When I look at your "Pro's and Con's" list it sure seems like you get a lot more of what you DON'T want and DON'T need.

[Dream Weaver]

I know I’m late to this party.

Don’t beat yourself up. Love and lust do crazy things to a man’s judgement and at the end of the day you lost a few bucks. Some people are basically walking vampires. Don’t be ashamed you fell for one (I have two friends who did). Find a good person, not a dipshit party girl.