Things Your Wife Does For Others, But Not For You

[coastalkid]

I'm just wanting to understand more, no judgements, everybody gets their kicks differently. I get that.

My wife isn't a hot wife. She knows I like the idea. When we are having sex doggy style sometimes I'll drag my cock across her asshole before I enter her pussy. Since she does like to tease, she will always reply with, "Sorry baby! That hole is only for the big cocks." She actually doesn't like anal sex (so she says). So by default I've accepted the "real" denial. We don't have anal sex. She's not a hot wife so there are no other big cocks. She doesn't watch porn. She doesn't read erotica. So how did she come up with this thought? Is it some sort of instinctive response?

I know there are many men that say they love this kind of denial. Denial is really hard for me to understand. If you do in fact like the denial then does it hurt as much, especially over time? Do you ever become so accustomed to being denied that you have no expectation? If you have no expectation then it makes me think of a line from an Allman Brothers song, "You can't lose what you never had".

Is it better when your wife/gf throws it in your face? Would it be better or worse if she never said anything, just denied you thing she secretly gives others? How would you separate that denial from the standard denial without knowing?

Logically it would seem like you would naturally hate denial for it to affect you in a way that excites you or brings out strong emotions. If you crave denial, then aren't you getting exactly what you want? If you're getting what you want then how objectionable is it?

I know everybody is different. I don't believe there's one clear answer because of the randomness of personalities. I'd like to read anything from any of you that know more about this, have experienced this, or just to share your opinion.

[Wifesharing]

I have never really consider it denial I know that if I pushed or asked for these things She would do them with me as well. I don't because it just in not on my nature.

My wife has done sexual acts with others that we have not done and during sex with other men it can appear completely different then when her and I have sex. The thing for me is I know that for each man she sleeps with they will come together in different ways and things will be different to make her have to behave with me the same she might with another man is silly. She is not the same with each of hers lovers. Anal is one thing I never have been interested in getting anal a few of her lovers have been and have succeeded in getting it I love to watch and see this side of her unleashed but I don't have a desire to fuck her in the ass. Also there is this a women with one guy dating or married she knows what she needs to do to please and keep me happy so I Get that with new lovers or other lovers she either goes a bit beyond making she is pleasing, also once she learns what a guy really likes wants to five that.

So i never feel like it is denial I am getting everything I want and I know if I decided I wanted it I could have anal she may not enjoy it it with me as much and that is one reason I wouldn't do. She can not control how her body reacts to different people. IF it was the same for every guy I think it would not be a reason to do this at all.

[masculinecuck]

My wife has NEVER swallowed my cum but will eagerly swallow her lovers cum, various scenarios with cum...
SHe'll give me a cum kiss which her lovers get a kick out of.
She'll let it drip back on his cock and slowly lick it up, off her fingers or offer my mouth to clean his cock.

[coastalkid]

I have never really consider it denial I know that if I pushed or asked for these things She would do them with me as well. I don't because it just in not on my nature.

My wife has done sexual acts with others that we have not done and during sex with other men it can appear completely different then when her and I have sex. The thing for me is I know that for each man she sleeps with they will come together in different ways and things will be different to make her have to behave with me the same she might with another man is silly. She is not the same with each of hers lovers. Anal is one thing I never have been interested in getting anal a few of her lovers have been and have succeeded in getting it I love to watch and see this side of her unleashed but I don't have a desire to fuck her in the ass. Also there is this a women with one guy dating or married she knows what she needs to do to please and keep me happy so I Get that with new lovers or other lovers she either goes a bit beyond making she is pleasing, also once she learns what a guy really likes wants to five that.

So i never feel like it is denial I am getting everything I want and I know if I decided I wanted it I could have anal she may not enjoy it it with me as much and that is one reason I wouldn't do. She can not control how her body reacts to different people. IF it was the same for every guy I think it would not be a reason to do this at all.

Thank you for your reply and your answer. i totally get where you're coming from. She's doing things with an intent to attract the man she's with and not with the intent of denying you. She's going to be different with different guys. She doesn't sound like the type that uses the knowledge that she's done something with someone else that she hasn't done with you to see your reaction. That isn't the way you guys implement your version of the lifestyle apparently.

Thanks again!

[coastalkid]

My wife has NEVER swallowed my cum but will eagerly swallow her lovers cum, various scenarios with cum...
SHe'll give me a cum kiss which her lovers get a kick out of.
She'll let it drip back on his cock and slowly lick it up, off her fingers or offer my mouth to clean his cock.

Thanks for your response! I guess the million dollar question is do you really want her swallow your cum? The next question is, does she use the denial to verbally frustrate/excite you? I say frustrate/excite because I figure it could be one or the other or a mixture of both. From your response I gather that having cock in your mouth is also something you like/do, so cum is something familiar to you. So you've done more than most and you're somewhat prepared for other possibilities. Would it ruin things for you if your wife suddenly didn't enjoy denying swallowing your cum and demanded it?

[ucaneffher]

All of those are valid questions! I don't have answers but I'm happy to share some of my experiences lived throughout 7 years in the lifestyle.

Denial beginning
I never asked for denial, ever. I was addicted to sex so naturally I wanted it all day everyday. However, when we entered the lifestyle she started this thing where she didn't want to have sex with me on the day she planned to be with another man because she wanted to be "tight". I went with it and thought it was a little hot but it wasn't my thing not did I hype it. I thought one day of no sex with her while she was with someone else was tolerable.

After a while she added an extra day so now it was two days denied. The previous day and the day she was going to see her guy. This was also tolerable especially because she got me used to the one day ordeal for a while. I didn't think much of it. Eventually the 2 days became 3 days. Again, it was tolerable after she had basically weaned me off that delicious pussy.

As she gained experience and got comfortable being a hot girlfriend, she also started wanting to branch out and be with more guys, and she did. Now she was planning on seeing various guys during the week. This is where she started having a little fun and teased me. She didn't enforce it if I pushed which I did push back. If she was seeing two guys In one week then I had to wait. Anyway that's how it started before she was addicted to the lifestyle.

Anal denial
She never liked anal, we tried several times and never got past the tip and she told me to forget it. However, when we were 20 years old she met her favorite lover. This girl was obsessed with him, literally addicted to him and couldn't get enough of him. She was willing to do Anything for him and this resulted in her telling me that she was going to officially give him her anal virginity because she didn't want to have any part of her body off limits to him and wanted him to have all of her whenever he wanted. I asked her if this meant me getting anal after she lost her virginity to him and she told me no. She told me that her ass was only going to be for him and no one else, not me not any of her other lovers.

Oral & swallowing
I rarely got oral, let alone her swallowing my semen. I think she tried swallowing once and she hated it. Oral with me gave her jaw pain and her jaw even locked once because she had to open wide in order no to scrape me with her teeth. Eventually we gave up on trying to give me oral and instead I learned that a handful of her guys were getting oral Everytime they saw my GF. She initially didn't want to tell me she was swallowing all along but she eventually told me and would use it to tease me that some of her friends were finishing in my girlfriend's mouth and she was swallowing every drop.


Ultimate denial
The 3 day rule of no sex before her outings was one thing but she reached a point where on of her FWB became her regular one summer and she was very interested in him. She saw him so frequently that the 3 day rule didn't get a chance to reset. She was seeing him almost every day or every other day. When I mentioned it to her she laughed and apologized but explained that he fucked her really good, he was spontaneous, and wasn't afraid to fuck her anywhere (she loved risk) he was fucking my girlfriend in public all summer long and she couldn't get enough so that my first time going 4 months without sex.

2 years later she got a boyfriend, one night after coming home from her daily visits to his place, during reclaiming her she stopped me and told me that she felt wrong like she was cheating on him and told me she no longer wanted to have sex with me. Only foreplay and cuddles for me during reclaiming her. I tried to have sex with her every day during reclamation foreplay but she was firm. After 4 or 5 months of trying once I had soaking wet and horny from reclamation foreplay, she still refused and enforced by telling me her body was his. After those 4-5 months, I finally accepted and stopped trying to penetrate her. Not only did I not have sex with her for almost a year but she got off birth control when she went exclusive with him.

Sorry for the long post.. a lot happened in 7 years of being her cuckold.

[coastalkid]

All of those are valid questions! I don't have answers but I'm happy to share some of my experiences lived throughout 7 years in the lifestyle.

Denial beginning
I never asked for denial, ever. I was addicted to sex so naturally I wanted it all day everyday. However, when we entered the lifestyle she started this thing where she didn't want to have sex with me on the day she planned to be with another man because she wanted to be "tight". I went with it and thought it was a little hot but it wasn't my thing not did I hype it. I thought one day of no sex with her while she was with someone else was tolerable.

After a while she added an extra day so now it was two days denied. The previous day and the day she was going to see her guy. This was also tolerable especially because she got me used to the one day ordeal for a while. I didn't think much of it. Eventually the 2 days became 3 days. Again, it was tolerable after she had basically weaned me off that delicious pussy.

As she gained experience and got comfortable being a hot girlfriend, she also started wanting to branch out and be with more guys, and she did. Now she was planning on seeing various guys during the week. This is where she started having a little fun and teased me. She didn't enforce it if I pushed which I did push back. If she was seeing two guys In one week then I had to wait. Anyway that's how it started before she was addicted to the lifestyle.

Anal denial
She never liked anal, we tried several times and never got past the tip and she told me to forget it. However, when we were 20 years old she met her favorite lover. This girl was obsessed with him, literally addicted to him and couldn't get enough of him. She was willing to do Anything for him and this resulted in her telling me that she was going to officially give him her anal virginity because she didn't want to have any part of her body off limits to him and wanted him to have all of her whenever he wanted. I asked her if this meant me getting anal after she lost her virginity to him and she told me no. She told me that her ass was only going to be for him and no one else, not me not any of her other lovers.

Oral & swallowing
I rarely got oral, let alone her swallowing my semen. I think she tried swallowing once and she hated it. Oral with me gave her jaw pain and her jaw even locked once because she had to open wide in order no to scrape me with her teeth. Eventually we gave up on trying to give me oral and instead I learned that a handful of her guys were getting oral Everytime they saw my GF. She initially didn't want to tell me she was swallowing all along but she eventually told me and would use it to tease me that some of her friends were finishing in my girlfriend's mouth and she was swallowing every drop.


Ultimate denial
The 3 day rule of no sex before her outings was one thing but she reached a point where on of her FWB became her regular one summer and she was very interested in him. She saw him so frequently that the 3 day rule didn't get a chance to reset. She was seeing him almost every day or every other day. When I mentioned it to her she laughed and apologized but explained that he fucked her really good, he was spontaneous, and wasn't afraid to fuck her anywhere (she loved risk) he was fucking my girlfriend in public all summer long and she couldn't get enough so that my first time going 4 months without sex.

2 years later she got a boyfriend, one night after coming home from her daily visits to his place, during reclaiming her she stopped me and told me that she felt wrong like she was cheating on him and told me she no longer wanted to have sex with me. Only foreplay and cuddles for me during reclaiming her. I tried to have sex with her every day during reclamation foreplay but she was firm. After 4 or 5 months of trying once I had soaking wet and horny from reclamation foreplay, she still refused and enforced by telling me her body was his. After those 4-5 months, I finally accepted and stopped trying to penetrate her. Not only did I not have sex with her for almost a year but she got off birth control when she went exclusive with him.

Sorry for the long post.. a lot happened in 7 years of being her cuckold.

Thank you for detailed response. I appreciate your sharing your evolution/journey.

Regarding the things that she does for others that she won't do for you, it seems a lot like one of the previous posters. Initially some of these things were stuff that she wasn't into and you just didn't do them. She realized they were things her lovers/bfs wanted and to keep them interested she chose to do them. It would be interesting to know if she has truly changed her attitude towards these acts and has found that she does actually enjoy doing them now. Of course openly admitting that actually does enjoy them would be akin to admitting she was wrong about them may not fit into the whole "dominant/submissive" scenario that has been established.

The "ultimate denial" seems like the result of a natural progression that inevitably lead to where you are now. This is where I get a little lost and confused. Once you have accepted that nothing is going to happen and no longer make an attempt to have sex isn't some of the anxiety that heightened the denial missing? Concurrently, aren't you conditioned to the point that you have less and less of a struggle with your own desire and anxiety?

When I read accounts like yours I always wonder, now that there is no sex, no motivation to seek out that sex, and you've become completely compliant, hasn't some of the thrill gone for both of you? The initial challenge was taking a partner that wanted sex and conditioning them to not. Now that that challenge is fully and undeniably achieved, is it about the relationship continuing as something that seems more like roommates than husband and wife?

If your wife knows she can do whatever she wants and it really no longer evokes a response from you when she does, is it as exciting for her? Doesn't a lot of this depend on you still wanting, or thinking it's possible to have sex with her? If you no longer react the way you used to and accept whatever she does without resistance are you even a factor? I can see how there could/would be a thrill in the progression.

If the end result is producing a husband that no longer seeks, or expects, or desires sexual satisfaction from your wife then what does your wife do with you then? What is the next escalation? What keeps away the eventual predictable routine that alters excitement when compliance is fully achieved? It's my guess that you aren't really being denied any longer if your desire/motivation/drive to seek that satisfaction is non-existent.

For couples that practice "ultimate denial", what happens when everything is achieved and there are no challenges or struggles? Having and enjoying a liberated sex life seems like it is about NOT doing the "normal things", and yet with a fully achieved "ultimate denial" there is a "new normal". How does normal stay exciting?

[masculinecuck]

My wife has NEVER swallowed my cum but will eagerly swallow her lovers cum, various scenarios with cum...
SHe'll give me a cum kiss which her lovers get a kick out of.
She'll let it drip back on his cock and slowly lick it up, off her fingers or offer my mouth to clean his cock.

Thanks for your response! I guess the million dollar question is do you really want her swallow your cum? YES YES YES The next question is, does she use the denial to verbally frustrate/excite you? YES YES YES I say frustrate/excite because I figure it could be one or the other or a mixture of both. From your response I gather that having cock in your mouth is also something you like/do, so cum is something familiar to you. So you've done more than most and you're somewhat prepared for other possibilities. Would it ruin things for you if your wife suddenly didn't enjoy denying swallowing your cum and demanded it? Trust me she'll NEVER swallow my cum that and the fact I only got 5 BJ's last year>>>>>>>

[ucaneffher]

I apologize I'm advance for such a long response. Hopefully it's not too redundant.

Thank you for detailed response. I appreciate your sharing your evolution/journey.

Thank you for reading it and also responding with great detail.

Regarding the things that she does for others that she won't do for you, it seems a lot like one of the previous posters. Initially some of these things were stuff that she wasn't into and you just didn't do them. She realized they were things her lovers/bfs wanted and to keep them interested she chose to do them. It would be interesting to know if she has truly changed her attitude towards these acts and has found that she does actually enjoy doing them now. Of course openly admitting that actually does enjoy them would be akin to admitting she was wrong about them may not fit into the whole "dominant/submissive" scenario that has been established.

You are spot on with your comment. I agree that some things are possibly things she didn't like doing such as anal. She eventually did give her anal virginity to her boyfriend but it just confirmed that it wasn't for her. Nonetheless, just the action of surrendering it to someone else is quite symbolic, especially when she says that she wants to give herself entirely and wants nothing on her body to be off limits to her man.

Oral on the other hand became normal for her and in those 7 years of her cuckolding me, I probably got 2 or 3 partial blow jobs at most while she was out blowing a select group of her lovers not only on the regular but to completion.

One more thing I didn't add in the previous message:

She changed permanently.
she dressed to impress when she went out with her men - her clothes got tighter, shorter, and skimpier. Hair was always done, Mani/Pedi done frequently, diet and exercise became part of her lifestyle along with cuckolding, her make-up collection became expensive and she looked flawless at any given moment, her underwear got smaller and smaller until she eventually stopped wearing altogether (our last 5 years together she went full commando for easy access) also she did hundreds of keggels per day and had me help her with a "leg stretching" routine to keep her flexible for everyone. High heel use became daily and almost normal.

The lifestyle literally became a full blown lifestyle for us and not just while she was away with other men. An example is that all of her self-care and pampering became centered on her being a hot girlfriend with many lovers. Her self identity became tied with being a hot girlfriend. Buying clothing and lingerie revolved around which lovers would love such lingerie or who would she go dancing with to wear that sexy mini dress we saw at the mall. I admit that a lot of that was also me who asked and even suggested when we went shopping.

I joked that she was always on-call and always up kept herself because when a text message or phone call came in from another man saying "I miss you and wanna see you" she was always available and never turned him down unless she was already with another guy but in that situation she would have me pick her up from guy 1 after freshening up at his place and had me drop her off at guy 2 where she would likely spend the night. Funny enough in this situation, she wouldn't rush and still spend time with guy 1 until he was done and their time together concluded but if she was with me, we'd have to cut our romantic date shot. Oftentimes resulting in asking for to go boxes for our food, leaving the movie theater halfway through the movie, if at the bar or club with our friends we'd have to leave. All because I had to drive my girlfriend to to have sex with the man wanting to see her. Many times on Friday nights with friends, it would simply mean driving from one night club where we all were to drop her off at another where her lover and his friends were.

I loved and enjoyed the changes and still benefited from them for the most part but we both knew she was doing this to keep her group of guy friends happy as well as to attract attention from new friends, something that she actively pursued. She was open about liking and wanting male attention and admitted that it made it easier for to get approached so she kept it up.

Small side note, we met at a real young age and got in the lifestyle before we could legally drink... after she implemented these changes and had about a dozen guy friends who she saw frequently, I just never saw that innocent girl in her anymore but instead this empowered sexy woman who knew what she wanted and did what she had to do in order to have her fun and satisfy her needs. I supported her 100% even when it meant getting the short end of the deal, it was my idea to turn her into a hot GF and she reminded me of it when I got jealous.


The "ultimate denial" seems like the result of a natural progression that inevitably lead to where you are now. This is where I get a little lost and confused. Once you have accepted that nothing is going to happen and no longer make an attempt to have sex isn't some of the anxiety that heightened the denial missing? Concurrently, aren't you conditioned to the point that you have less and less of a struggle with your own desire and anxiety?

it is definitely a natural progression, it started with her withholding sex one day until eventually I found myself not going inside her for almost a year. I think that it's very reasonable to say that if her and I remained together, the chances of her permanently denying me while having another man or men as her primary sexual partner(s) was a very high probability.

I think that what made it tolerable for me was that she was ever so smooth and gradually increased the heat, never making abrupt moves or changes. She was so gradual that I never noticed her transitions until she fully transitioned and already belonged to another man. I was okay with this because it happened slowly before my eyes and since it was so minimal over a stretched period, it became normal. She did just the right amount of teasing for me to associate her transition as something sexy.

Just because I stopped making an attempt to penetrate my girlfriend/have sex with her during reclamation foreplay doesn't mean that I no longer wanted sex or her. While my denial wasn't permanent, it was certainly a long fucking time to not get laid especially while my girlfriend was now officially having intercourse every single day, she was actually making love to her boyfriend to be specific.

While she did eventually condition me to accept that she was only going to have intercourse with him, she still kept me engaged and interested. We were still in love and she still kept me sexually satisfied by teasing me with some details, teasing me when she undressed herself when she got home from her daily love making with her boyfriend, I got sexy pictures of her taken by her boyfriend and other men. There is nothing hotter than seeing your woman in lingerie or underwear in some strange house you've never been. During Most of that denial time my dick was red and sore from beating it raw. I'll give you an example, imagine your wife wearing a thong and cropped spaghetti strap camisole in some guys kitchen posing sexy. Or a picture of her posing next to some bed her in full blown skin tight lacy lingerie with fishnet/mesh thigh high stockings, exotic dancer platform heels, her hair styled almost as if she went to get it professionally done, and her makeup completely done to the nines.

That's what my GF did to keep me not only engaged but over a decade later, I realize it was her way of showing me that she had made me her cuckold and that I would put up with her giving herself to men in ways that she never did and never would with me and she was right. I complained about not getting her like that and she would soften by reminding me that I still got to enjoy the pictures of what the other men were getting.

She made the lifestyle a team sport, I helped my girlfriend with her physical upkeep by going with her to hair and nail salons, gym, going shopping and giving feedback with all of her new clothes/underwear /lingerie, helping her with her intense leg and lower body stretches, helping her dress and get ready for men, and dropping her off /picking her up. She kept me very much engaged despite identifying as a single and available woman publicly. I enjoyed being the cuckold who had some type of purpose and it was ensuring that my GF was always available and able to go out with no disruption. I enjoyed making her life easy and facilitate/enable her to go out. Those are all words I would have NEVER said in the beginning of the lifestyle but now easily and comfortably say them.

So yea, your woman going exclusive with another man or men and you accepting it does not make you not care about sex anymore nor does it bring the relationship to some type of plateau as long as she still enjoys sharing with you while you pleasure yourself. I'm a sucker for jealousy and she loved taking me for a wild ride. She loved sex but she needed a connection first so she loved having tons of guy friends whom she could get along with and connect with. This meant that hanging out and spending time with them could and would almost always result in bed with them. She made them friends so she could fuck them all. My girlfriend had almost 20 guy friends, that's more guy friends than I had. For me that was exciting and even more for her.


When I read accounts like yours I always wonder, now that there is no sex, no motivation to seek out that sex, and you've become completely compliant, hasn't some of the thrill gone for both of you?

There was no penetrative sex but only for extended periods. The first time was 4 months and it was sort of undiscussed and just happened due to her 3 day rule and her addiction to her lover. The second time was deliberate ans enforced. The second time was roughly little over 8 months which I often say almost a year because it felt eternal. We still had good amounts of sex before and after those periods when time permitted and she was available. The thrill was very much there, I loved spending time with my slutty girlfriend even if the sex was mostly for all of her guy friends who kept her cellphone notifications constantly going off every 5 minutes every day because she was engaged in a permanent text conversation with all of her FWBs

The initial challenge was taking a partner that wanted sex and conditioning them to not. Now that that challenge is fully and undeniably achieved, is it about the relationship continuing as something that seems more like roommates than husband and wife?

That's an interesting way to put it. That was not our original goal or challenge, at least not on my end. I just wanted a slutty girlfriend who had a lot of sexual partners and a high body count. She realized early on that she wasn't the one night stand type of girl and needed to feel safe and comfortable with her partners. I guess that her connecting so deeply with her make guy friends made her extra comfortable and wanting to give them all more whether it was dressing pretty for them, spending the entire day with them, or feeling safe and therefore wanting more from them such as letting them all finish inside of her.

This is what lead both of us into wanting her to give herself on a deeper level. I wanted it, she wanted it, her. However this obviously meant me taking the hit for the team by getting less and stepping aside. While I do believe that at some instances we were more like roommates and best friends, we were partners in crime and the crime was her cuckolding the living jeebus out of me. Despite All this, we always kept a strong level of connection, intimacy, and love, even when she was in already love with her boyfriend and was not only sexually exclusive to him but she openly admitted that her and her boyfriend didn't fuck and they actually made love whenever they were intimate which was daily. She never hid that and was even open by telling me that her orgasms occurred at the same time as him when they made love, when he was going to start ejaculating in her, she tensed up and had mind-blowing orgasms as she received all of him in her. This was what I jerked off to for over 8 months, my girlfriend telling me that she came when her boyfriend came inside her while making love to him.

If your wife knows she can do whatever she wants and it really no longer evokes a response from you when she does, is it as exciting for her?

She could certainly do whatever she wanted and she had my blessings and support, not only that but she always did get a response from me. I was engaged and turned on 24/7 by her and our lifestyle. I want to believe that it was exciting for her otherwise she would've just left me for any of her lovers.

Doesn't a lot of this depend on you still wanting, or thinking it's possible to have sex with her?

Absolutely, I very much wanted her. I still had sex with her just nor as much as we had prior to starting the lifestyle, the lifestyle slowed and reduced sex for me but not her, in those 7 years of lifestyle, realistically my girlfriend had sex everyday multiple times a day whether it was with me, or any of her dozen and a half guy friends whom she communicated with almost daily. Something that initially hurt but I accepted was that when she became official with her boyfriend, the one who had her exclusively for 8+ months, she admitted she no longer made love to me, she came clean and told me I fucked her good but her boyfriend brought out the passion. She was very clear that she made love to him and she fucked me. In hose 2-3 years of her being with her boyfriend, I learned to accept that he was taking over and I was becoming her best friend with love and benefits. We originally had discussed such transition but hadn't realized that she was already working on it

She always did provide me with reassurance though. She would tell me that even though she loved him and only made love to him, that she still loved me.
After the 8 ish month denial period was over, we resumed sex. Before or during sex she would remind me that she was in love with him and that her body was his but that she still loved fucking me and had no problem giving giving me the body that belongs to him for a little fun. The first time hearing her tell me that was hurtful but it helped establish that the roles switched for everyone. Eventually she conditioned me further and I accepted that her boyfriend was here primary partner emotionally and sexually and I was now her fuck buddy although it was a step above because we were still in love and still in a relationship doing relationship activities but only when she wasn't busy with her now primary relationship. Our relationship was still in existence but conditional, our time together, our sex, our relationship was dependent on her relationship with her boyfriend of 2 years.

If you no longer react the way you used to and accept whatever she does without resistance are you even a factor? I can see how there could/would be a thrill in the progression.

That's a good point, she essentially knows there's no pushback and she runs the show. That is most likely how I found myself as her secondary partner while she openly and publicly dated her now primary man. The guy who started as her fuck buddy was now publicly claiming my girlfriend for himself while she secretly had us sneaking around and had me complying with her relationship with him meaning that their relationship took priority and I had to abide by that in order for our secret relationship to work.


If the end result is producing a husband that no longer seeks, or expects, or desires sexual satisfaction from your wife then what does your wife do with you then?

That's a good point. There are husbands here who haven't touched their wives in decades but they somehow have some type of relationship. I would never want to be in a relationship where there's no desire or sexual interest in my wife. While the husband fills a role of a provider and safety, there still needs to be connection between husband and wife even if there is no preventative sex. In my case, I always kept interested while she was getting her orgasms elsewhere and enjoyed her adventures as a promiscuous woman so we both got something out of it. In the end, as long as my wife still includes me and teases me, I think that I can accept her getting sex from other men while letting me masturbate to her active sex life with other man or another man if she decides on one steady relationship.

What is the next escalation?

Excellent question, I think it depends A lot on the dynamic of the couple. In my case it was me being completely replaced by another man while she kept me to witness the transition 100% as he claimed her. I experience the entirety of it from the night that she met him at a friends 18th birthday party down to the day that she told me she had gotten off birth control while being sexually exclusive to him.

For some couples it can be the cuckold just being the safety for the wife should things go sour with her lover, for others he's very much involved and included in their relationship watching the wife and her new man be a couple ( this is what I want), for others the husband is just an extreme push over or masochist and gets off on the wife disrespecting him and using him for money, shelter, and chores. Not Cool but it works for some.


What keeps away the eventual predictable routine that alters excitement when compliance is fully achieved? It's my guess that you aren't really being denied any longer if your desire/motivation/drive to seek that satisfaction is non-existent.

Right on again not fully denied and actually never was with the exception of those two times I mentioned early. The first one when I was 21 years old and the second one when I was 23, also vanilla, monotony, and normality gets boring quick. I have my own extreme fantasy that I would very much want to live even if just for 6 months. Sometimes taking breaks and resuming can give a relationship that needed boost in the bed.

I'll never get tired of wanting my partner sexually even if her total source of sex comes from another man or men, in fact that is what KEEPS me interested. I find it that the thought of her not being promiscuous is a turn off and would be very much prefer that she had partners outside of our relationship.

For couples that practice "ultimate denial", what happens when everything is achieved and there are no challenges or struggles? Having and enjoying a liberated sex life seems like it is about NOT doing the "normal things", and yet with a fully achieved "ultimate denial" there is a "new normal". How does normal stay exciting?

That is exactly why the husband needs to be engaged and included every step of the way. Ultimate denial can sound exciting but in my opinion, a husband and wife should still have sex at least once in a while. He should look forward to something and that means maybe getting laid on his birthday or anniversary...

I have a fantasy that brushes a bit on ultimate denial but doesn't quite get there. The fantasy is essentially similar to what my hot girlfriend conditioned me to back in our early 20s. I want the same scenario of her having a boyfriend, falling in love/making love to him, borderline sexually exclusive to him, and making him her primary partner.

The differences are:
Unlike with her first boyfriend, the new boyfriend and I actually get along and become best friends, he is aware and accepts that I'm in the picture and we are in fact sharing a girlfriend- her, upon meeting those prerequisites of him being a good fit and us guys getting along. They continue to date and develop their relationship.

Once they reach a certain level of love and trust, and once he and I reach a level of friendship where we hang out and work on our projects together like good friends. Once we see that she is spending various nights at his place or he comes to our place to spend the night then we start the "transition".

The 3 of us sit down and discuss him moving in with us and we explain that be both like him a lot and feel comfortable with them having access to each other on a more frequent and permanent basis especially because we noticed that in the last few months they had been having more sex than her and I have..

With her in agreement, I extend the invitation for him to move into our home but not only move in to have easy access to her but I explain that I want to surrender her to him. We want him to move into our home and completely take over the role of her partner inside our home and on a full time basis. This includes me moving into our spare bedroom and letting him take my place in the master bedroom so that he can sleep with her at night and have full unrestricted access to his girlfriend every night.

He's surprised but he asks both if we seriously want this and we both readily say yes. We explain that inside the privacy of our home, she will be 100% undeniably his but in public he's a roommate and I'm her husband but to us in reality and in the privacy our home I will be the roommate and he will be here husband.

Her and I explain that we have discussed and agreed on wanting this for a long time and simply wanted to find the perfect man. She explains to him that she wants to be able to let go and be herself at home without holding back in front of me. She wants to be able to walk around in lingerie, underwear, or naked around our home in front of us, wants to be able to watch a movie with him on the couch and end up riding him without worrying where I am, she wants to be able take showers with him without worrying about me, our entire home is fair game for him to claim her even if I'm there. She wants him to not hold back and claim her entirely for himself whether it's making love to her or fucking her brains out at 3am and waking me up while I'm solo in my room.

He looks at his friend (me) and says,this is what she wants. I'm more than ok with that but are you okay with that? Are you going to be okay constantly hearing us having sex at night or walking in and seeing her bent over the kitchen counter with me inside of her, coming home from work and hearing moans from the shower as we shower together?

My answers to everything are yes, I want exactly that. I want to be turned into your roommate while you two can't get enough of each other. I want to come home and witness seeing your girlfriend in the most extreme lingerie giving herself to you passionately not giving a damn that her husband is present, neither of you care that I'm there and treat me as invisible as she begins to orgasm and you simply proceed to finish inside her because it's your right and what you always do. I want you to make me the spectator of your sex life with my wife and she already told me that she wants a sex life with you and wants to keep me on edge 24/7. They smile at the same time hearing that and nod their heads. We end up setting ground rules and planning his move and my demotion.

The rules are that while they are the primary couple:
-I still get to sleep with her a couple of nights each week to keep connection and intimacy.
-Her and I still kiss, hug, express love for each other in the house and outside.
-He will be her primary and almost exclusive sex partner with the exception of me getting sex on my birthday and our anniversary.
-its expected for me to witness their relationship and intimacy in our home. Her and I want the master bedroom door open at all times with the exception of any two designated days where they can just be each others without peeking.
-While they can't publicly announce their relationship, they can go out on local dates with some discretion or drive a little further away where they don't have to hold back in public, and away on vacations
- we split 100% of our expenses.



It most likely would not be wise to live this fantasy out...













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[coastalkid]

I apologize I'm advance for such a long response. Hopefully it's not too redundant.

Thank you for detailed response. I appreciate your sharing your evolution/journey.

Thank you for reading it and also responding with great detail.
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[/quote]
Thank you! You at a minimum affirmed a lot of things that I felt were natural and honest questions about how it works and how it progresses/evolves. I've learned a lot from my time at this website, enough to know not to question the truth of their posts/replies. People will never fail to amaze you. They are capable of the unimaginable!

I'm fascinated by the experiences I read here. I especially like learning about the emotional/mental changes/stages that a husband/bf go through as a cuckold of a hot wife/gf. I'm just as interested in how wives/gf handle their responsibility and power. Even though "I think" I want a hot wife, I've learned from this site that I DEFINITELY don't want my relationship to be like some of the ones you read about here. Thankfully, I've also learned from this site that there is an innumerable number of ways to engage in this lifestyle.

Whenever I' think about denial from observing what I've read here, it always seems that it needs escalation. I suppose it's because I'm a retired Math teacher I realize that there is an end point to escalation. Most would say that's being "pussy free". That's exactly where my mind stops. I know it's because my own puny brain can't make sense of it.

A long time ago when I used to attend church I had a very similar mind stopping conundrum. Everybody wants to go to Heaven, right? You live forever in the clouds or some ethereal place. My question was so what do you do there? All the stuff I really like doing is supposed to be the stuff that keeps you out of Heaven not in it. No way they're having gangbangs in Heaven, right? I'm not sure if I'm sold on Heaven. Ultimately I guess that's why I'm not sold on denial, I want to fuck too much! That's why I don't understand it, but it does becoming clearer the more people like you share your experience.

Thanks for yours!

[stubbyhubby]

When we first married she would only let me hump her for 30-60 seconds, then would push me away and say she didn't want to risk me cumming and getting her pregnant. She wasn't on birth control so I assumed she just didn't want to get pregnant in general. The first time my best friend fucked her he came in her. Every guy since then has been allowed to cum in her. Once she started fucking other guys she cut me off, so I have never came in my wife, but everyone else has.

Everything else including cum in her mouth, swallowing cum, facials, cum on tits, anal, tit fucking abs everything else has been denied to me, but other guys get it.

[coastalkid]

When we first married she would only let me hump her for 30-60 seconds, then would push me away and say she didn't want to risk me cumming and getting her pregnant. She wasn't on birth control so I assumed she just didn't want to get pregnant in general. The first time my best friend fucked her he came in her. Every guy since then has been allowed to cum in her. Once she started fucking other guys she cut me off, so I have never came in my wife, but everyone else has.

Everything else including cum in her mouth, swallowing cum, facials, cum on tits, anal, tit fucking abs everything else has been denied to me, but other guys get it.

How long have you been married? How long into your marriage was it before she started doing all those things with everyone but you? Does your wife throw in your face?

[mrs_hotwifecplsa]

She eventually did give her anal virginity to her boyfriend but it just confirmed that it wasn't for her. Nonetheless, just the action of surrendering it to someone else is quite symbolic, especially when she says that she wants to give herself entirely and wants nothing on her body to be off limits to her man.

Oral on the other hand became normal for her and in those 7 years of her cuckolding me, I probably got 2 or 3 partial blow jobs at most while she was out blowing a select group of her lovers not only on the regular but to completion.

One more thing I didn't add in the previous message:

She changed permanently.
she dressed to impress when she went out with her men - her clothes got tighter, shorter, and skimpier. Hair was always done, Mani/Pedi done frequently, diet and exercise became part of her lifestyle along with cuckolding, her make-up collection became expensive and she looked flawless at any given moment, her underwear got smaller and smaller until she eventually stopped wearing altogether (our last 5 years together she went full commando for easy access) also she did hundreds of keggels per day and had me help her with a "leg stretching" routine to keep her flexible for everyone. High heel use became daily and almost normal.

The lifestyle literally became a full blown lifestyle for us and not just while she was away with other men. An example is that all of her self-care and pampering became centered on her being a hot girlfriend with many lovers. Her self identity became tied with being a hot girlfriend. Buying clothing and lingerie revolved around which lovers would love such lingerie or who would she go dancing with to wear that sexy mini dress we saw at the mall. I admit that a lot of that was also me who asked and even suggested when we went shopping.

I joked that she was always on-call and always up kept herself because when a text message or phone call came in from another man saying "I miss you and wanna see you" she was always available and never turned him down unless she was already with another guy but in that situation she would have me pick her up from guy 1 after freshening up at his place and had me drop her off at guy 2 where she would likely spend the night. Funny enough in this situation, she wouldn't rush and still spend time with guy 1 until he was done and their time together concluded but if she was with me, we'd have to cut our romantic date short. Oftentimes resulting in asking for to go boxes for our food, leaving the movie theater halfway through the movie, if at the bar or club with our friends we'd have to leave. All because I had to drive my girlfriend to to have sex with the man wanting to see her. Many times on Friday nights with friends, it would simply mean driving from one night club where we all were to drop her off at another where her lover and his friends were.

I really felt these. I had a similar transformation and desire to reserve some things only for my Bulls. And I was always ready.. because like you described, I might get a last minute call to meet, and I did NOT want to miss it. I wanted my lover(s) to know that when they called me with their need, I'd be the woman to come through. And I had a few back to back dates, or intimate time or nights out with my husband cut short like you described. I decided early on that oral to completion and anal were reserved for Bulls. I cut my husband off from my pussy, but not completely. He never knows when he'll get it, and it's always after a Bull has me first.

[MartasBoy]

My wife isn't a hot wife. She knows I like the idea. When we are having sex doggy style sometimes I'll drag my cock across her asshole before I enter her pussy. Since she does like to tease, she will always reply with, "Sorry baby! That hole is only for the big cocks." She actually doesn't like anal sex (so she says). So by default I've accepted the "real" denial. We don't have anal sex. She's not a hot wife so there are no other big cocks. She doesn't watch porn. She doesn't read erotica. So how did she come up with this thought? Is it some sort of instinctive response?...

I know everybody is different. I don't believe there's one clear answer because of the randomness of personalities. I'd like to read anything from any of you that know more about this, have experienced this, or just to share your opinion.

There are a lot of things my wife has done with her boyfriends that she has always said she isn't into, or doesn't like. She has always told me that she doesn't like anal and I have never been allowed to try that with her. But I have seen photos of her allowing other guys to do that. When I have asked her about the contradiction, she has told me that she just was trying to be a good sport to keep her boyfriend happy.

My wife is a very smart, very successful career woman, who supervises a large staff in five programs throughout four different regions of our state. We have a female dominant marriage at home. But my wife has taken an incredibly submissive role with a couple of dominant guys she has been with.

[hotfreaks]

With me, my wife was indifferent to anal. Occasionally, she would let me. She had a long time older bull who see saw for a few years, and she admitted to me that she craved anal with him. She would let him fuck her ass whenever he pleased and she loved it. It was quite the turn on for me.

Additionally, when I first started dating my wife, she didnt suck my dick for almost 2 months. Im not sure her reasoning behind this. But, when we got into the lifestyle, she would eagerly suck a guys cock within minutes of meeting them. The mind fuck was a big turn on

[iloanmywife]

This is a good question. The are a handful of things that gnaw at me, in a delightfully painful cuckold way. I think about them from time to time and they give me that familiar cuckolded feeling. I'll spare you all of the deliberate denial things we've done in the past, which really were part of our mutual play (e.g., no bareback at the demand of our then-Bull).

1. Facials and cumming in her mouth. I'd literally never cum on her face or in her mouth. One night she showed me a video of the date she had earlier in the day (a date I didn't know about until I saw the video). She was on her knees sucking cock, then he was ready to burst. He shot ropes across her face and in her mouth, calling her filthy names. She was giggling and opened her mouth wide and stuck out her tongue to catch it, then swallowed. She'd come home from dates tasting like semen and tell me about how she just finished blowing some guy. She always swallowed cum, except when the guy blasted on her face. The only times she's ever let me cum on her face have been when we've "had company" and I'm adding my load to the mess. She does not swallow my cum at all.

2. Public sex or indecency. She went to another man's condo wearing stockings, heels, and her long coat. That's it. She sucked a guy off in the parking garage of a very popular tourist spot in our city, and he gave her a cum facial. She told me that she was lucky to have napkins in her purse, because they went right back inside. She and her then-boyfriend got caught fucking in the back of her SUV, and it was late afternoon or early evening. And she's sucked off guys and fucked in their cars in parking lots. She once sent me a picture of an empty condom wrapper, taken from the inside of a bathroom at a crowded restaurant at like 8 or 9 PM. Her text was "I just got fucked in the women's bathroom!" When they walked out there were women waiting in line when. I've stood watch for her and other men while they've fucked in the parking lot of a forest preserve or a dark street corner at a street fest, but I've never fucked her like that myself. She's sucked off guys while driving and in the backseat of a taxi (once when I was sitting in the front with the driver).

3. Rough stuff. Everything she's done or had done to her has been with her enthusiastic approval and consent. But stuff I would not or cannot do to her. She's come home with welts and handprints on her ass and bruises on her tits. I've watched her get dragged by her hair around rooms. Forced to crawl. Guys fish-hooking her mouth while fucking her from behind. Face slapping (lightly though). Choking, something she's always told me she does not like. I've watch her bounce on cock with two hands wrapped around her throat.

4. Piss play. Not really her thing and not really mine. One time we were playing together and during a break in the action -- he was having trouble getting hard -- I left to go to the store to get another bottle of wine. When I came back she was in the shower. When she came out I got the story from both of them. They hadn't expected me back so soon. They had been fucking and my wife had to pee. She was naked on the toilet. He came into the bathroom and stood in front of her. She started to suck him off. He pulled back and started pissing on her. She had stopped peeing herself while she was sucking him off, but she was able to start again and piss with him as she was being pissed on. Apparently a lot and there were a lot of towels on the floor. He had assured me "it was just on her tits and stomach" which I hadn't asked about and which seemed odd to say. I also noticed that she had washed her hair, something she would never do on a hotel room fuck-date like that.

5. Sleeping naked. Even when we're on vacation, my wife doesn't like to sleep naked or without panties. She frequently has with other men. She doesn't have many (any) one-night dates anymore, but when she used to meet guys off of social media, she almost always slept naked if she slept at all. It was usually just a full night of fucking. She almost always slept naked or pantie-less with a long-term boyfriend she had. She used to spend about one night per week at his place. One night I was out of town and was watching her fuck another mutual friend on our bedroom security camera, at her suggestion (she knew, he did not). After they were done fucking they made out for a bit and then she rolled over to go to sleep, wearing only a t-shirt. I left the motion activation on for the night. I got an alarm setting on my phone a few hours later as he climbed on top of my still sleeping wife and started fucking her.

6. Anal sex, kind of. The only times she lets me fuck her in the ass is when another man is in her pussy. So I guess I should be thankful for that.

Honestly, I'm sure there are others that I don't know I'm missing out on.

[ohtobecucked]

My wife has always hated giving blowjobs ('too dirty') and the only times I have ever had a BJ from her I HAD to wear a condom - we used to get flavoured ones.

She has NEVER made her BF wear one and she gives him head most days of the week when she's over at his place. I think the excitement and the taboo aspect of the relationship just gets rid of the inhibitions, allowing her to really let go.

[Long Lurker 34]

I apologize I'm advance for such a long response. Hopefully it's not too redundant.

Thank you for detailed response. I appreciate your sharing your evolution/journey.

Thank you for reading it and also responding with great detail.

Regarding the things that she does for others that she won't do for you, it seems a lot like one of the previous posters. Initially some of these things were stuff that she wasn't into and you just didn't do them. She realized they were things her lovers/bfs wanted and to keep them interested she chose to do them. It would be interesting to know if she has truly changed her attitude towards these acts and has found that she does actually enjoy doing them now. Of course openly admitting that actually does enjoy them would be akin to admitting she was wrong about them may not fit into the whole "dominant/submissive" scenario that has been established.

You are spot on with your comment. I agree that some things are possibly things she didn't like doing such as anal. She eventually did give her anal virginity to her boyfriend but it just confirmed that it wasn't for her. Nonetheless, just the action of surrendering it to someone else is quite symbolic, especially when she says that she wants to give herself entirely and wants nothing on her body to be off limits to her man.

Oral on the other hand became normal for her and in those 7 years of her cuckolding me, I probably got 2 or 3 partial blow jobs at most while she was out blowing a select group of her lovers not only on the regular but to completion.

One more thing I didn't add in the previous message:

She changed permanently.
she dressed to impress when she went out with her men - her clothes got tighter, shorter, and skimpier. Hair was always done, Mani/Pedi done frequently, diet and exercise became part of her lifestyle along with cuckolding, her make-up collection became expensive and she looked flawless at any given moment, her underwear got smaller and smaller until she eventually stopped wearing altogether (our last 5 years together she went full commando for easy access) also she did hundreds of keggels per day and had me help her with a "leg stretching" routine to keep her flexible for everyone. High heel use became daily and almost normal.

The lifestyle literally became a full blown lifestyle for us and not just while she was away with other men. An example is that all of her self-care and pampering became centered on her being a hot girlfriend with many lovers. Her self identity became tied with being a hot girlfriend. Buying clothing and lingerie revolved around which lovers would love such lingerie or who would she go dancing with to wear that sexy mini dress we saw at the mall. I admit that a lot of that was also me who asked and even suggested when we went shopping.

I joked that she was always on-call and always up kept herself because when a text message or phone call came in from another man saying "I miss you and wanna see you" she was always available and never turned him down unless she was already with another guy but in that situation she would have me pick her up from guy 1 after freshening up at his place and had me drop her off at guy 2 where she would likely spend the night. Funny enough in this situation, she wouldn't rush and still spend time with guy 1 until he was done and their time together concluded but if she was with me, we'd have to cut our romantic date shot. Oftentimes resulting in asking for to go boxes for our food, leaving the movie theater halfway through the movie, if at the bar or club with our friends we'd have to leave. All because I had to drive my girlfriend to to have sex with the man wanting to see her. Many times on Friday nights with friends, it would simply mean driving from one night club where we all were to drop her off at another where her lover and his friends were.

I loved and enjoyed the changes and still benefited from them for the most part but we both knew she was doing this to keep her group of guy friends happy as well as to attract attention from new friends, something that she actively pursued. She was open about liking and wanting male attention and admitted that it made it easier for to get approached so she kept it up.

Small side note, we met at a real young age and got in the lifestyle before we could legally drink... after she implemented these changes and had about a dozen guy friends who she saw frequently, I just never saw that innocent girl in her anymore but instead this empowered sexy woman who knew what she wanted and did what she had to do in order to have her fun and satisfy her needs. I supported her 100% even when it meant getting the short end of the deal, it was my idea to turn her into a hot GF and she reminded me of it when I got jealous.


The "ultimate denial" seems like the result of a natural progression that inevitably lead to where you are now. This is where I get a little lost and confused. Once you have accepted that nothing is going to happen and no longer make an attempt to have sex isn't some of the anxiety that heightened the denial missing? Concurrently, aren't you conditioned to the point that you have less and less of a struggle with your own desire and anxiety?

it is definitely a natural progression, it started with her withholding sex one day until eventually I found myself not going inside her for almost a year. I think that it's very reasonable to say that if her and I remained together, the chances of her permanently denying me while having another man or men as her primary sexual partner(s) was a very high probability.

I think that what made it tolerable for me was that she was ever so smooth and gradually increased the heat, never making abrupt moves or changes. She was so gradual that I never noticed her transitions until she fully transitioned and already belonged to another man. I was okay with this because it happened slowly before my eyes and since it was so minimal over a stretched period, it became normal. She did just the right amount of teasing for me to associate her transition as something sexy.

Just because I stopped making an attempt to penetrate my girlfriend/have sex with her during reclamation foreplay doesn't mean that I no longer wanted sex or her. While my denial wasn't permanent, it was certainly a long fucking time to not get laid especially while my girlfriend was now officially having intercourse every single day, she was actually making love to her boyfriend to be specific.

While she did eventually condition me to accept that she was only going to have intercourse with him, she still kept me engaged and interested. We were still in love and she still kept me sexually satisfied by teasing me with some details, teasing me when she undressed herself when she got home from her daily love making with her boyfriend, I got sexy pictures of her taken by her boyfriend and other men. There is nothing hotter than seeing your woman in lingerie or underwear in some strange house you've never been. During Most of that denial time my dick was red and sore from beating it raw. I'll give you an example, imagine your wife wearing a thong and cropped spaghetti strap camisole in some guys kitchen posing sexy. Or a picture of her posing next to some bed her in full blown skin tight lacy lingerie with fishnet/mesh thigh high stockings, exotic dancer platform heels, her hair styled almost as if she went to get it professionally done, and her makeup completely done to the nines.

That's what my GF did to keep me not only engaged but over a decade later, I realize it was her way of showing me that she had made me her cuckold and that I would put up with her giving herself to men in ways that she never did and never would with me and she was right. I complained about not getting her like that and she would soften by reminding me that I still got to enjoy the pictures of what the other men were getting.

She made the lifestyle a team sport, I helped my girlfriend with her physical upkeep by going with her to hair and nail salons, gym, going shopping and giving feedback with all of her new clothes/underwear /lingerie, helping her with her intense leg and lower body stretches, helping her dress and get ready for men, and dropping her off /picking her up. She kept me very much engaged despite identifying as a single and available woman publicly. I enjoyed being the cuckold who had some type of purpose and it was ensuring that my GF was always available and able to go out with no disruption. I enjoyed making her life easy and facilitate/enable her to go out. Those are all words I would have NEVER said in the beginning of the lifestyle but now easily and comfortably say them.

So yea, your woman going exclusive with another man or men and you accepting it does not make you not care about sex anymore nor does it bring the relationship to some type of plateau as long as she still enjoys sharing with you while you pleasure yourself. I'm a sucker for jealousy and she loved taking me for a wild ride. She loved sex but she needed a connection first so she loved having tons of guy friends whom she could get along with and connect with. This meant that hanging out and spending time with them could and would almost always result in bed with them. She made them friends so she could fuck them all. My girlfriend had almost 20 guy friends, that's more guy friends than I had. For me that was exciting and even more for her.


When I read accounts like yours I always wonder, now that there is no sex, no motivation to seek out that sex, and you've become completely compliant, hasn't some of the thrill gone for both of you?

There was no penetrative sex but only for extended periods. The first time was 4 months and it was sort of undiscussed and just happened due to her 3 day rule and her addiction to her lover. The second time was deliberate ans enforced. The second time was roughly little over 8 months which I often say almost a year because it felt eternal. We still had good amounts of sex before and after those periods when time permitted and she was available. The thrill was very much there, I loved spending time with my slutty girlfriend even if the sex was mostly for all of her guy friends who kept her cellphone notifications constantly going off every 5 minutes every day because she was engaged in a permanent text conversation with all of her FWBs

The initial challenge was taking a partner that wanted sex and conditioning them to not. Now that that challenge is fully and undeniably achieved, is it about the relationship continuing as something that seems more like roommates than husband and wife?

That's an interesting way to put it. That was not our original goal or challenge, at least not on my end. I just wanted a slutty girlfriend who had a lot of sexual partners and a high body count. She realized early on that she wasn't the one night stand type of girl and needed to feel safe and comfortable with her partners. I guess that her connecting so deeply with her make guy friends made her extra comfortable and wanting to give them all more whether it was dressing pretty for them, spending the entire day with them, or feeling safe and therefore wanting more from them such as letting them all finish inside of her.

This is what lead both of us into wanting her to give herself on a deeper level. I wanted it, she wanted it, her. However this obviously meant me taking the hit for the team by getting less and stepping aside. While I do believe that at some instances we were more like roommates and best friends, we were partners in crime and the crime was her cuckolding the living jeebus out of me. Despite All this, we always kept a strong level of connection, intimacy, and love, even when she was in already love with her boyfriend and was not only sexually exclusive to him but she openly admitted that her and her boyfriend didn't fuck and they actually made love whenever they were intimate which was daily. She never hid that and was even open by telling me that her orgasms occurred at the same time as him when they made love, when he was going to start ejaculating in her, she tensed up and had mind-blowing orgasms as she received all of him in her. This was what I jerked off to for over 8 months, my girlfriend telling me that she came when her boyfriend came inside her while making love to him.

If your wife knows she can do whatever she wants and it really no longer evokes a response from you when she does, is it as exciting for her?

She could certainly do whatever she wanted and she had my blessings and support, not only that but she always did get a response from me. I was engaged and turned on 24/7 by her and our lifestyle. I want to believe that it was exciting for her otherwise she would've just left me for any of her lovers.

Doesn't a lot of this depend on you still wanting, or thinking it's possible to have sex with her?

Absolutely, I very much wanted her. I still had sex with her just nor as much as we had prior to starting the lifestyle, the lifestyle slowed and reduced sex for me but not her, in those 7 years of lifestyle, realistically my girlfriend had sex everyday multiple times a day whether it was with me, or any of her dozen and a half guy friends whom she communicated with almost daily. Something that initially hurt but I accepted was that when she became official with her boyfriend, the one who had her exclusively for 8+ months, she admitted she no longer made love to me, she came clean and told me I fucked her good but her boyfriend brought out the passion. She was very clear that she made love to him and she fucked me. In hose 2-3 years of her being with her boyfriend, I learned to accept that he was taking over and I was becoming her best friend with love and benefits. We originally had discussed such transition but hadn't realized that she was already working on it

She always did provide me with reassurance though. She would tell me that even though she loved him and only made love to him, that she still loved me.
After the 8 ish month denial period was over, we resumed sex. Before or during sex she would remind me that she was in love with him and that her body was his but that she still loved fucking me and had no problem giving giving me the body that belongs to him for a little fun. The first time hearing her tell me that was hurtful but it helped establish that the roles switched for everyone. Eventually she conditioned me further and I accepted that her boyfriend was here primary partner emotionally and sexually and I was now her fuck buddy although it was a step above because we were still in love and still in a relationship doing relationship activities but only when she wasn't busy with her now primary relationship. Our relationship was still in existence but conditional, our time together, our sex, our relationship was dependent on her relationship with her boyfriend of 2 years.

If you no longer react the way you used to and accept whatever she does without resistance are you even a factor? I can see how there could/would be a thrill in the progression.

That's a good point, she essentially knows there's no pushback and she runs the show. That is most likely how I found myself as her secondary partner while she openly and publicly dated her now primary man. The guy who started as her fuck buddy was now publicly claiming my girlfriend for himself while she secretly had us sneaking around and had me complying with her relationship with him meaning that their relationship took priority and I had to abide by that in order for our secret relationship to work.


If the end result is producing a husband that no longer seeks, or expects, or desires sexual satisfaction from your wife then what does your wife do with you then?

That's a good point. There are husbands here who haven't touched their wives in decades but they somehow have some type of relationship. I would never want to be in a relationship where there's no desire or sexual interest in my wife. While the husband fills a role of a provider and safety, there still needs to be connection between husband and wife even if there is no preventative sex. In my case, I always kept interested while she was getting her orgasms elsewhere and enjoyed her adventures as a promiscuous woman so we both got something out of it. In the end, as long as my wife still includes me and teases me, I think that I can accept her getting sex from other men while letting me masturbate to her active sex life with other man or another man if she decides on one steady relationship.

What is the next escalation?

Excellent question, I think it depends A lot on the dynamic of the couple. In my case it was me being completely replaced by another man while she kept me to witness the transition 100% as he claimed her. I experience the entirety of it from the night that she met him at a friends 18th birthday party down to the day that she told me she had gotten off birth control while being sexually exclusive to him.

For some couples it can be the cuckold just being the safety for the wife should things go sour with her lover, for others he's very much involved and included in their relationship watching the wife and her new man be a couple ( this is what I want), for others the husband is just an extreme push over or masochist and gets off on the wife disrespecting him and using him for money, shelter, and chores. Not Cool but it works for some.


What keeps away the eventual predictable routine that alters excitement when compliance is fully achieved? It's my guess that you aren't really being denied any longer if your desire/motivation/drive to seek that satisfaction is non-existent.

Right on again not fully denied and actually never was with the exception of those two times I mentioned early. The first one when I was 21 years old and the second one when I was 23, also vanilla, monotony, and normality gets boring quick. I have my own extreme fantasy that I would very much want to live even if just for 6 months. Sometimes taking breaks and resuming can give a relationship that needed boost in the bed.

I'll never get tired of wanting my partner sexually even if her total source of sex comes from another man or men, in fact that is what KEEPS me interested. I find it that the thought of her not being promiscuous is a turn off and would be very much prefer that she had partners outside of our relationship.

For couples that practice "ultimate denial", what happens when everything is achieved and there are no challenges or struggles? Having and enjoying a liberated sex life seems like it is about NOT doing the "normal things", and yet with a fully achieved "ultimate denial" there is a "new normal". How does normal stay exciting?

That is exactly why the husband needs to be engaged and included every step of the way. Ultimate denial can sound exciting but in my opinion, a husband and wife should still have sex at least once in a while. He should look forward to something and that means maybe getting laid on his birthday or anniversary...

I have a fantasy that brushes a bit on ultimate denial but doesn't quite get there. The fantasy is essentially similar to what my hot girlfriend conditioned me to back in our early 20s. I want the same scenario of her having a boyfriend, falling in love/making love to him, borderline sexually exclusive to him, and making him her primary partner.

The differences are:
Unlike with her first boyfriend, the new boyfriend and I actually get along and become best friends, he is aware and accepts that I'm in the picture and we are in fact sharing a girlfriend- her, upon meeting those prerequisites of him being a good fit and us guys getting along. They continue to date and develop their relationship.

Once they reach a certain level of love and trust, and once he and I reach a level of friendship where we hang out and work on our projects together like good friends. Once we see that she is spending various nights at his place or he comes to our place to spend the night then we start the "transition".

The 3 of us sit down and discuss him moving in with us and we explain that be both like him a lot and feel comfortable with them having access to each other on a more frequent and permanent basis especially because we noticed that in the last few months they had been having more sex than her and I have..

With her in agreement, I extend the invitation for him to move into our home but not only move in to have easy access to her but I explain that I want to surrender her to him. We want him to move into our home and completely take over the role of her partner inside our home and on a full time basis. This includes me moving into our spare bedroom and letting him take my place in the master bedroom so that he can sleep with her at night and have full unrestricted access to his girlfriend every night.

He's surprised but he asks both if we seriously want this and we both readily say yes. We explain that inside the privacy of our home, she will be 100% undeniably his but in public he's a roommate and I'm her husband but to us in reality and in the privacy our home I will be the roommate and he will be here husband.

Her and I explain that we have discussed and agreed on wanting this for a long time and simply wanted to find the perfect man. She explains to him that she wants to be able to let go and be herself at home without holding back in front of me. She wants to be able to walk around in lingerie, underwear, or naked around our home in front of us, wants to be able to watch a movie with him on the couch and end up riding him without worrying where I am, she wants to be able take showers with him without worrying about me, our entire home is fair game for him to claim her even if I'm there. She wants him to not hold back and claim her entirely for himself whether it's making love to her or fucking her brains out at 3am and waking me up while I'm solo in my room.

He looks at his friend (me) and says,this is what she wants. I'm more than ok with that but are you okay with that? Are you going to be okay constantly hearing us having sex at night or walking in and seeing her bent over the kitchen counter with me inside of her, coming home from work and hearing moans from the shower as we shower together?

My answers to everything are yes, I want exactly that. I want to be turned into your roommate while you two can't get enough of each other. I want to come home and witness seeing your girlfriend in the most extreme lingerie giving herself to you passionately not giving a damn that her husband is present, neither of you care that I'm there and treat me as invisible as she begins to orgasm and you simply proceed to finish inside her because it's your right and what you always do. I want you to make me the spectator of your sex life with my wife and she already told me that she wants a sex life with you and wants to keep me on edge 24/7. They smile at the same time hearing that and nod their heads. We end up setting ground rules and planning his move and my demotion.

The rules are that while they are the primary couple:
-I still get to sleep with her a couple of nights each week to keep connection and intimacy.
-Her and I still kiss, hug, express love for each other in the house and outside.
-He will be her primary and almost exclusive sex partner with the exception of me getting sex on my birthday and our anniversary.
-its expected for me to witness their relationship and intimacy in our home. Her and I want the master bedroom door open at all times with the exception of any two designated days where they can just be each others without peeking.
-While they can't publicly announce their relationship, they can go out on local dates with some discretion or drive a little further away where they don't have to hold back in public, and away on vacations
- we split 100% of our expenses.



It most likely would not be wise to live this fantasy out...



UC
- I have followed and read your posts for quite some time. Always intrigued with your early dynamic with your former HGF.
- With this, I think, your most, certainly lengthy (not complaining) and deep diving comprehensive post, with all that took place and her ultimately leaving you entirely and marrying, it makes me wonder. As much as now, from what I understand, that she has children and is happily married, if she still has that "itch" and in the due course of time will resume her activities as a HW on some level?

[/quote]

[ucaneffher]

UC
- I have followed and read your posts for quite some time. Always intrigued with your early dynamic with your former HGF.

Dude, I myself am intrigued with the crazy shit that I lived in my late teens and 20s! I still often think back and can't believe that lived through years and years of extreme cuckolding at such a young age. I think it's safe to assume that living through this at such a young age has shaped me into the man I am today and while the final outcome of that relationship wasn't the ideal outcome, I lived the wildest fantasy I could ever ask for and have no major regrets. .

- With this, I think, your most, certainly lengthy (not complaining) and deep diving comprehensive post, with all that took place and her ultimately leaving you entirely and marrying, it makes me wonder. As much as now, from what I understand, that she has children and is happily married, if she still has that "itch" and in the due course of time will resume her activities as a HW on some level?

I know absolutely nothing about her and her life right now so I can't speak for the present. However , I know that back then she was highly promiscuous and even when she was already official with her boyfriend for 12-24 months and trying to settle with him on a more permanent relationship, she couldn't keep her legs closed.

Despite him being her official boyfriend and then being together that long, her and I still saw each other secretly for sex. We still told each other that we loved each other but we both understood and acknowledged she was his. Even then during those times, while we were lying in bed just having pillow talk after we finished having sex, she would often be honest with me and would tell me things like "this Monday I went to see Walter while my bf was at work" or "Wednesday after my bf dropped me off at home, Alex picked me up and I spent the night at his place"m

Also there was the most memorable thing I can remember and I'm sure I've mentioned it in OHW before. She had already been officially dating him publicly for nearly two years and I was publicly out of the picture and she told me one night in bed after we had sex "I have something to tell you and I know you'll love it because you always wanted this when I was your girlfriend. This week I've had sex with 5 different men" when I asked her if her boyfriend knew she was sleeping around and she said of course not! I also asked how she managed and she said that every single night that week after her boyfriend took her home, other guys were already nearby waiting on her sign to pick her up or go in her place just like I was right at that moment. I was the 5th guy that week.

So, given that she would tell me this even after she had been with him in a long term serious relationship and was still seeing her normal guys and adding a couple of new ones to the mix just leads me to believe that she wasn't ready to give up being a hot girlfriend and had now been cheating on him for years. I was having sex with her the entire time after she finished denying me/ went public with him, I just didn't know she was also seeing that many other men still so jokes on her boyfriend lol

That is why I said what I said... There's a remote possibility that she has cheated on him at the very least one time since I walked out of her life.

[Tamilcuck]

Hi all. I like this post and wanted to give my contribution. In my case, my wife will do the following with bull and her previous bf of 12 years but not for me.
1. Sex. I have not been inside her since more than 10 yrs.
2. Suck my penis. She loves to suck bulls penis as she loves the big size.
3. Mouth kissing. She kisses bull and old bf with mouth and tongue but for me it is a peck on the lips but mostly cheek
4. Cum on face. Bull and old bf and a number of other guys have done this but not me. Also, with my small penis and fat tummy, my cum does not shoot out. it just dribbles so I have not done with her. New bull can almost cover her whole face with cum even at the 3rd round. He is young and strong with a big penis
5. Dress in sexy lingerie. She has a very sexy body but does not dress in sexy lingerie for me. She has mentioned that since there is no sex, she does not feel like it. I agree too.
6. Lick asshole. Bull likes for her to lick his asshole and she likes to do it for him. I have not been allowed to watch but I have heard him moaning from outside the room. Wife said he likes it when he lies on the bed and hooks his knees under his arms, leaving his asshole wife open. She likes to lick it and stick her tongue in. She says it drives him crazy. And with her other hand she masturbates his penis for him. I have told her I would love to watch that but she has not agreed yet. Hopefully soon.

I do not regret any of this as I have been able to watch her many times with either sex or lovemaking and it is the most beautiful thing. I am actually proud that she would do those things for others.

[stubbyhubby]

When we first married she would only let me hump her for 30-60 seconds, then would push me away and say she didn't want to risk me cumming and getting her pregnant. She wasn't on birth control so I assumed she just didn't want to get pregnant in general. The first time my best friend fucked her he came in her. Every guy since then has been allowed to cum in her. Once she started fucking other guys she cut me off, so I have never came in my wife, but everyone else has.

Everything else including cum in her mouth, swallowing cum, facials, cum on tits, anal, tit fucking abs everything else has been denied to me, but other guys get it.

How long have you been married? How long into your marriage was it before she started doing all those things with everyone but you? Does your wife throw in your face?

We have been married for 32 years now. She started 4 months after we got married. She doesn't throw it in my face, but sometimes she jokes in a mocking way.

[ucaneffher]

When we first married she would only let me hump her for 30-60 seconds, then would push me away and say she didn't want to risk me cumming and getting her pregnant. She wasn't on birth control so I assumed she just didn't want to get pregnant in general. The first time my best friend fucked her he came in her. Every guy since then has been allowed to cum in her. Once she started fucking other guys she cut me off, so I have never came in my wife, but everyone else has.

Everything else including cum in her mouth, swallowing cum, facials, cum on tits, anal, tit fucking abs everything else has been denied to me, but other guys get it.

How long have you been married? How long into your marriage was it before she started doing all those things with everyone but you? Does your wife throw in your face?

We have been married for 32 years now. She started 4 months after we got married. She doesn't throw it in my face, but sometimes she jokes in a mocking way.

This is sort of a fantasy for me although I don't know how healthy of a fantasy it realistically is for the marriage. While we are not officially in the lifestyle, we are discussing marriage. I would love to see her date other men and find a regular fuck buddy before we get married. Ideally I would love it if he could manage to seduce her and become her boyfriend before we get married.

If she doesn't already have a boyfriend before we get married, then I'd hope for her to have one shortly after the wedding. Decades into our marriage I'd love to look back and have the certainty that from day one (or close to it) my wife has never once been sexually/ exclusively mine and she has potentially belonged sexually to another man longer than we've been married.

I think part of it also has to do with wanting the boyfriend to be the last man to make love to her as an unmarried woman and the first man to have her as a married woman. Not to mention bringing him to the honeymoon so that he can officially claim her and have her entirely during the honeymoon.

I'm only going on my honeymoon with my wife to take pictures of us on our honeymoon and mainly to watch them be the newlywed couple both in and out of the bedroom and finally have an intimate moment with my new wife both for the first time as her husband as well as for the first time in a while since the boyfriend took over months prior to the wedding.

Our honeymoon quickie (at the end of the honeymoon after he's had her all honeymoon long) will also be our last time having penetrative sex until the next anniversary or my next birthday, which ever comes first . Outside of those two dates, penetration will be completely for her boyfriend.

I am the husband and we dearly love each, in our marriage we stay connected with frequent romantic dates, vacations, cuddling / foreplay, going dancing, other couples activities like the gym, road trips, spending time with friends and family, compliments and gifts.

Outside of us being madly in love and remaining connected in every way except for penetrative sex , there is no doubt that she physically belongs to her boyfriend and she is addicted to him, she does not hide it and openly admits to being addicted and unable to get enough of him. He knows it, she knows it, and I know it and this is exactly why she moves him into our master bedroom so that she can have him as much as time allows and when their days are busy, they make up for it in bed at night before falling asleep with each other in their master bedroom while her husband is in his bedroom alone.

[stubbyhubby]

When we first married she would only let me hump her for 30-60 seconds, then would push me away and say she didn't want to risk me cumming and getting her pregnant. She wasn't on birth control so I assumed she just didn't want to get pregnant in general. The first time my best friend fucked her he came in her. Every guy since then has been allowed to cum in her. Once she started fucking other guys she cut me off, so I have never came in my wife, but everyone else has.

Everything else including cum in her mouth, swallowing cum, facials, cum on tits, anal, tit fucking abs everything else has been denied to me, but other guys get it.

How long have you been married? How long into your marriage was it before she started doing all those things with everyone but you? Does your wife throw in your face?

We have been married for 32 years now. She started 4 months after we got married. She doesn't throw it in my face, but sometimes she jokes in a mocking way.

This is sort of a fantasy for me although I don't know how healthy of a fantasy it realistically is for the marriage. While we are not officially in the lifestyle, we are discussing marriage. I would love to see her date other men and find a regular fuck buddy before we get married. Ideally I would love it if he could manage to seduce her and become her boyfriend before we get married.

If she doesn't already have a boyfriend before we get married, then I'd hope for her to have one shortly after the wedding. Decades into our marriage I'd love to look back and have the certainty that from day one (or close to it) my wife has never once been sexually/ exclusively mine and she has potentially belonged sexually to another man longer than we've been married.

I think part of it also has to do with wanting the boyfriend to be the last man to make love to her as an unmarried woman and the first man to have her as a married woman. Not to mention bringing him to the honeymoon so that he can officially claim her and have her entirely during the honeymoon.

I'm only going on my honeymoon with my wife to take pictures of us on our honeymoon and mainly to watch them be the newlywed couple both in and out of the bedroom and finally have an intimate moment with my new wife both for the first time as her husband as well as for the first time in a while since the boyfriend took over months prior to the wedding.

Our honeymoon quickie (at the end of the honeymoon after he's had her all honeymoon long) will also be our last time having penetrative sex until the next anniversary or my next birthday, which ever comes first . Outside of those two dates, penetration will be completely for her boyfriend.

I am the husband and we dearly love each, in our marriage we stay connected with frequent romantic dates, vacations, cuddling / foreplay, going dancing, other couples activities like the gym, road trips, spending time with friends and family, compliments and gifts.

Outside of us being madly in love and remaining connected in every way except for penetrative sex , there is no doubt that she physically belongs to her boyfriend and she is addicted to him, she does not hide it and openly admits to being addicted and unable to get enough of him. He knows it, she knows it, and I know it and this is exactly why she moves him into our master bedroom so that she can have him as much as time allows and when their days are busy, they make up for it in bed at night before falling asleep with each other in their master bedroom while her husband is in his bedroom alone.

I can tell you that one of my greatest regrets is not having someone there to fuck Lisa on our wedding night. She was visibly disappointed when she saw me naked. The problem for us is she was still a virgin, so there was virtually no way for me to think it was even an option to have someone else fuck her. So my regret is double because it would have been perfect for her to lose her virginity to another man on our wedding night. Knowing that she agreed to fuck someone else just 4 months into our marriage makes me think she might have considered it on our wedding night.

[troilusand]

So, Stubby, you and Lisa have never consummated your marriage? WOW! How does THAT feel?

Troilus

[coastalkid]

So, Stubby, you and Lisa have never consummated your marriage? WOW! How does THAT feel?

Troilus

Good question! How DOES that feel? How did it feel then and how does it feel now?