Hotwife going out alone/why is it too difficult for me?

[BallSpanking]

Ballspanking is my loyal buddy! I think he deserves some hotwife panties one day?

Not today...?

[Trifecta]

Dear Mr and Mrs Reese,

I haven't posted on your thread for a long time, but have been keeping up (belatedly)... we were quite distressed to hear about your ex finding out about your activities, and both my wife and I were very pleased to hear that you were successful in keeping custody of your daughter. And you have our sympathies for having to go through all that shit.

Of course, now that he knows, the government knows... and I won't make any assumptions about whole else might know, but I only want to offer some redundant and really obvious advice... Please be careful (duh!). You are likely being monitored in some way, and the next time they come after you they will have something more substantial, like a pattern of behavior they can construe as "unfit". Sorry to say, our "freedom" loving government has taken children away from their parents for less.

I will leave it up to your good sense as to how to apply that advice. Keep in mind that monitoring your internet usage, phone usage, texts, IM, email, hell, even your vehicle whereabouts (hello OnStar!), etc. is not all that difficult for someone determined to do so. Private investigators are not as tightly bound by the law against surveillance as are the police, and civil courts are not as discriminating about how evidence is gathered.

Sorry, not trying to make it sound like the inquisition is out to get you, I just care and want you to keep your family together. I don't trust anyone outside my circle, and neither should you! So just don't give them anything to get you with!

Sometimes this world sucks. Then I realize that this is about the best it has ever been for us. Ironic.

Take care, good luck!

Tri and BV

[cum4me2]

Coming into this sitution late but still wanted to lend my support to you guys as well. It is a delicate and potentially stress filled situation that you find yourself in. I won't offer any advice other than godspeed in seeing it thru as well as you are strongest together and that strength will carry you thru.

I know when Donna went thru it with her ex, we weren't playing than but did have other personal issues that he tried to use against us to hurt her more than take custody of the kids, which he never truly wanted. He used that and anything both real and fabricated to make her seem unfit. In the end the courts only cared about the welfare and well being of the kids and not about any outside activities that may or may not be going on so long as the kids were not being harmed physically or emotionally and being provided for as they should be. The also weighed heavily on what the kids wanted and thought by talking to them privately with neither parent around to influence them. This in the end told the courts that the situation, being with us was both a healthy and the best enviroment for them and therefor they remained with us seeing no real reason to change custody.

Hang in there guys, this to shall pass...

[reese]

To all our friends,
Trifecta, cum4me and eveyone else that wrote to us over the past week.
Thankyou!!

WE really appreciate your support and suggestions.
All have been helpful to some degree.

My wife and I are missing our wild crazy hotwife days.
WE have decided to calm things down a bit.
But, I do have some good news.

WE are going to Chicago in 2 weeks.
WE plan on playing BIG TIME............hotwife/3some sex.

WE feel comfortable about playing like this while out of town....vacation!!

Her lawyer (whom she wants to fuck) informed both of us that we would have nothing to worry about playing on vacation!!

[BallSpanking]

I wish you loads of fun in Chicago...
Mrs Reese deserves the best!

[kcpa]

Chicago? Hey Aynsley, take note.

[hornedhubby]

Gee, do you think Mrs. Reese can really find any FB's in a strange town on such short notice?

Duhhhhh....

Best wishes to both of you.

[mrs_palmetto]

seagirthcuck, he is exactly like you explained, $ an asshole of a dad and revengful b/c he can't have me.

Mrs. Reese that was the very first thing that popped outta my mouth when I told Mr. P about this.. I'm not at all shocked. The guy needs to MOVE ON!!!

[mrs_reese]

Thanks Mrs.P for being there.
I wonder if he would have made such a big deal out of this if he knew you and I were lovers?
Oh, did i fail to mention that that would make my day!! Mrs.R and Mrs.P

I had an idea that I shared with my hubby today.
I wonder if I was to contact one of my previous lovers, explain the situation to them, and maybe have some one on one at my home with them.

We disagreed over whom I would feel most comfortable with.

We need some advice!!!!

Who would you suggest?

I am curious

[BallSpanking]

Definitely Justin and Marques, maybe Michael (from Maxim), or maybe Steve, Kevin, or Jared...
or possibly John, Brad, Derek, or Chris...?

[bubbajack]

I like the Marques idea - but possibly only because he was an integral part of one of the best hotwifing episodes I ever read about:

You, in the hotel bar, looking all freshly fucked and generally used, with M right there (who had done it to you), telling reese that M and you were ready for reese come up the room now - followed by all of you going back up you getting fucked again by both of them!!

If you have him over, you can fuck them both again and laugh about good old times together afterwards!

(The memory is making me hard again)

[flyinfast]

Mrs Reese!
Stand up PROUDLY!

There was not a single man in that courtroom (including your dumbfuck ex) that didn't have a hardon for you.
Your lifestyle is none of their business, and you always take every precaution to protect your daughter.

Well I'll probably get flamed (or worse) for this post... but here goes. I write for the benefit of Mrs. R.

With all due respect to BallSpanking, Mrs. P and Mrs R, while BallSpanking may be "right" that Mrs. Reese's lifestyle is none of "their" business, it is in fact a lifestyle that is not out in the open. And there is a reason for that. (We have gay pride parades. How many hotwife and cuckold parades? When are you all coming out of the closet? When do we get books in grade schools celebrating "My mommy's a hotwife and my daddy's a proud cuckold?" hmmm... )

Many of the "hotties" don't post their faces, as Mrs. R doesn't (or didn't). If the Reeses were fully out of the closet so to speak they know that wouldn't be good for them or their family.

I totally agree with the above statement made here!!! You're ex is stupid dumbfuck for believing that would've worked!!

Again with respect to Mrs. P, Mr. dumbfuck, evil ex, might make it work. And his motive maybe not so much protecting their daughter as getting back at Mrs. Reese.

I know a friends of ours that went through a terrible divorce (he cheated on his frigid bitch wife. And said wife is still my friend... you'd have to know her to understand... that's just how she is) She did everything in her power to totally screw him (except screw him). And she was very good at it. No woman ever scorned had as much furry as this woman. She used her children to punish him. She continually told her kids what an evil man their father was, to the point of them being afraid to stay home alone because their evil dad might come and get them. She had all her kids so "programmed" that the court psychologist denied him all contact with his kids. Total ban including a court order to stay 100 yards away from them. No email, no phone calls, nada.... And to this day (over ten years later) he still can't see his kids.

So... to Mrs. R. be very careful. If your ex is even remotely vindictive ... standing up proudly may be the worst thing you could do for your family. I would agree with others that it should not be that way, but in the real world of divorce and custody battles... well all is fair in love, war and hate.

HA! Next time he trys bringing up your sex life you just say, " I do NOT SEE how my NEW sex life with my NEW husband has ANYTHING to do with this matter!"

It isn't the sex life with her new husband that will be attacked in court. It is the "deviant" lifestyle and the risk of exposing that to the child that is all that will be considered. (and by "deviant" I mean that is how evil ex could portray it in court and how that could harm the child and the risk of exposing the child to that would be too great... etc.)

And if he's a vindictive type... you can bet he'll use it any way he can.

Don't let that SOB try to embarrass you in court or even with a case-worker! You got nothing to be embarrassed about!

Really? Can Mrs. R tell her daughter she was getting fucked by not one one but several black guys? That she's had multiple "affairs"? And that the daughter's step dad was all right with it?

If not why not? Would it be embarrassing to tell her daughter about her sexual preferences? Since Mrs. R enjoys this lifestyle so much wouldn't she want her daughter to at least know about it and possibly give it a try?

I used to tell my kids if they were about to do something (drugs.... multiple partner sex.... robbing a bank...) but couldn't tell their mother they were doing it, maybe they ought not be doing it. Same basic rule applies to parents behavior.

And lets look at this from this perspective. Turn the situation around. Suppose evil ex, Mr. dumbfuck was living the lifestyle Mrs. R was, that he was bring home a different hotwife to screw on a regular basis. That he engaged in sex with multiple partners... would that be a legitimate concern to Mrs. R? That her daughter not be exposed to that kind of lifestyle? That her father's "lifestyle" if exposed might not cause harm to her daughter and ridicule at school?

Is the evil ex and father legitimately trying to protect his daughter from a lifestyle that he doesn't think appropriate for her to be exposed to? Or is he just trying to embarrass Mrs. Reese out of spite? I don't know. I think many fathers knowing that their ex was doing what Mrs. R has done, would do everything they could to get full custody and keep their ex from having any contact with their daughter.

He can go screw himself! I would've called him up laughing at him and told him he should stop trying to get my kid from me... Be sure and tell him "Hello stupid person, Everyone on the planet knows the kid stays with the wife! Only way you're gonna get this kid FROM me is if I'm living in a cardboard box and begging people for change!!! Get over it!"

Uh, usually true. But it depends on how "evil" smart he is. If he hires the right attorney and right psychologist he could get full custody.

If Mrs R's lifestyle becomes common knowledge, which it will if her ex wants it to, how's that going to go down at PTA meetings?

SO ALL I AM SAYING... is Mrs. R be very careful. Whether it is fair or not, or right or not, the world, society, friends and not friends will judge. If their judgment matter to you in anyway... be careful. I'm sorry this happened and ever came up for I'm sure it has caused you a lot of grief. As gamblers say, "don't bet what you can't afford to loose". Can you afford the gamble that you'll loose your daughter? In an ideal world it wouldn't be an issue, but this isn't an ideal world.

And remember my screed about "addiction". This court event cause you to sober up - for a while, but notice now how you're saying you missed it.... that's craving... and that has consequences.

Peace and good luck to you and Mr. Reese. I hope it all works out the way you want it to.

[flyinfast]

Her lawyer (whom she wants to fuck) informed both of us that we would have nothing to worry about playing on vacation!!

You'd trust the advice of an attorney? One that wants in your wife's pants? lol... OTOH what you and your wife do with your attorney is probably "privileged" and can't be brought into court.... hmmm.... Wonder what the code of ethics would say about it though....

Seriously I wouldn't count on being out of town not mattering... it is all about how that might affect the well being of the child. If somehow that out of town playing does cause harm to the child... well the court won't take kindly to it.

[flyinfast]

... Please be careful (duh!). You are likely being monitored in some way, and the next time they come after you they will have something more substantial, like a pattern of behavior they can construe as "unfit". Sorry to say, our "freedom" loving government has taken children away from their parents for less.

Ditto.

Keep in mind that monitoring your internet usage, phone usage, texts, IM, email, hell, even your vehicle whereabouts (hello OnStar!), etc. is not all that difficult for someone determined to do so. ...

Is your wifi encrypted with the highest security? Passwords unguessable? Are your PCs encrypted? Can your daughter gain access to your PCs? It's not that hard to eavesdrop on cell phones either. Illegal but that doesn't stop a determined creep.

[bubbajack]

This guy, again!

[mrs_palmetto]

flyinfast-
In response to your post I will say that I doubt Mrs. Reese is taking her kid with her to every court hearing that the ex wants to toss at her... So yes I do think it's perfectly fine to tell the court or whomever (When the child isn't around which I'm sure was the case) That their sex life is none of anyones damn business.

As far as Mrs. Reese or others not being open about their sex life with family or sharing face pics on this board it is because it's their own personal business.. Mrs Reese and Any other person on this board don't owe anyone an explaination for their own sexlife. People ask questions you say "None of your business!!" As far as her child goes I'm VERY sure Mrs. Reese wasn't doing anything in front of her child that would get her ex a leg up if he sent the kid to a therapist to try and build a case.

Last, I will say that I've seen many moms in court over custody and I've yet to know ONE that doesn't have their kids!!!- INCLUDING the drug addict divorced mom that lived down the road from me for a few years!

[flyinfast]

Hi bubbajack...

Mrs. P no offense but I have to disagree, hopefully agreeably so... (and all I'm really saying to the Reeses is be very careful... so the rest of you can skip it.)

flyinfast-
In response to your post I will say that I doubt Mrs. Reese is taking her kid with her to every court hearing that the ex wants to toss at her... So yes I do think it's perfectly fine to tell the court or whomever (When the child isn't around which I'm sure was the case) That their sex life is none of anyones damn business.

Of course the child is not present in court, at least I hope the judge isn't that stupid.

But telling others in front of a judge in a custody case that their sex life is nobody's business won't fly. The court did say in effect "so long as it doesn't affect the child".

Mrs. R wrote:

At the end of the day, the case monitor told us both that what happens in our home or when child isnt with me is none of dad's business as long as I do not expose my child to this lifestyle.

What is considered exposing the child to this lifestyle? Her knowledge of her mother and step-dad's activities? Is that enough? And how did the father come to know of the Reese's activities? (And how much does he know? Did he hire a detective to follow her? I don't need answers, but certainly Mrs. R does). Was the ex and daughter out somewhere and saw Mrs. R with one of her lovers? I don't know... but if the father found out, the daughter probably could too. At the very least a vindictive and manipulative ex could do a lot of harm.

What if Mrs. R and her daughter where out shopping and evil ex dad was walking down the street with two bimbos on his arms. If I was her I wouldn't be real pleased to have my daughter go hang with her dad. I'm not saying Mrs. R did anything like that in public that her daughter could see, but what if the shoe was on the other foot? How would that make Mrs. R feel if her ex was with other women? Evil ex dad may be the bad guy, but he's still a human being with feelings and there is no point in needlessly provoking a war. It is just my opinion, but I think not saying anything that might inflame the situation would be a much wiser choice.

As far as Mrs. Reese or others not being open about their sex life with family or sharing face pics on this board it is because it's their own personal business..

. Of course it's their own business and their own choices... BUT in the real world if it becomes common knowledge then that has consequences. And those consequences are why most choose to keep it quiet. Telling people it's none of their business ... well that's right, but that doesn't mean people won't judge or react to the news. What are the consequences to the child if there are rumors going around school about her mother? Kids can be pretty damn mean.

... As far as her child goes I'm VERY sure Mrs. Reese wasn't doing anything in front of her child that would get her ex a leg up if he sent the kid to a therapist to try and build a case.

I hope for the child's sake Mrs. R's ex does not meet the woman scorned I mentioned above.

The risk is probably small... As you say, most mom's retain at least some custody, no matter what. Such is the bias in our courts.

But the risk to Mrs. R and her child is not zero. And that is all I'm saying to her. Be very careful. Be ever mindful of what you say, to whom, when and where. (And I'm writing this because of my personal experience with this very vindictive woman that did everything she could to destroy her ex. My wife was this woman's maid of honor at her wedding, her husband my business partner and our families were very close, our kids grew up together, vacations together and to watch how nasty things got.... just awful - for everyone. Mrs. R's ex sounds like he might be of a similar mindset.)

I agree you with Mrs. P that it SHOULD be that no one on this board had any reason to hide their face, couldn't proudly proclaim their lifestyle choices if they wanted to and that those choices were nobody's business but their own. But I think we all know that is not the reality today. Their are consequences and we are affected by the judgment of others. It's all fun and games until it isn't...

As always to the Reeses I hope this all works out well for you.

[mrs_palmetto]

What is considered exposing the child to this lifestyle? Her knowledge of her mother and step-dad's activities? Is that enough?

Are you a lawyer in real life or do you just PLAY one on the internet??

What if Mrs. R and her daughter where out shopping and evil ex dad was walking down the street with two bimbos on his arms.

Umm.. Who the hell cares?? I'm sure Mrs. Reese doesn't! The reason it's called EX is because of that reason isn't it? That seems like a "personal feeling" of jealousy and not about the kid at all in my opinion.

[/quote] As far as Mrs. Reese or others not being open about their sex life with family or sharing face pics on this board it is because it's their own personal business..[/quote]

Of course it's their own business and their own choices... BUT in the real world if it becomes common knowledge then that has consequences...

.
I do believe you're talking sideways here... In your comment above you made it sound like if we were SOOOO proud to be HW's where are the face pic's online?? Hello!! I was answering that question.. It's none of anyone's business but the person that decides to tell or show them..

[Iris777]

At the risk of letting this digress further, unless you have a child with someone other than the person you are currently married to/with it is very hard to to be able to tell a person in that situation that they shouldn't worry. The idea that you can just tell you ex it is none of his business is simply naive. People are drawn into custody battles every day for far less damning moral issues than multiple sex partners in one day. Both Aynsley and I have ex's who would make our lives a merry hell if some of the things we post here came to light while the children were/are minors.

The Reese's are right to be concerned and cautious, even more so than before. To not be would be cavalier and foolhardy. I have said it before, the ex has his radar up and may very well be looking for more trouble. I hope to high heaven that he has given this up and understands that their sex life, as long as their child is not exposed to it, is their business. Just because he lost this round doesn't mean that he might not be looking for more. I pray that is not the case.

[mrs_palmetto]

The idea that you can just tell you ex it is none of his business is simply naive. People are drawn into custody battles every day for far less damning moral issues than multiple sex partners in one day.

lol, You mean like the drug addict MOM I had living a FEW houses down from me? Naive? HA! Iris, I normally agree with ya babe but here I don't! I've lived in too many states and I've seen alot of crap! And I'm telling you SCARED is one thing and REAL is another... A woman that smokes crack in front of her kids is OK and WILL go to rehap and keep her kids??? ( Yes! It sucks but that's true!!) OH, I have seen it! So do u really think a MOM that has a sex life that she HASN'T put her kid in clear view of it is gonna get the AX??? I think alot of you are freakin' out and I don't see why this is more important than a drug user!-That is all!!!

[BallSpanking]

Honestly folks... is all this speculation thoughtful and useful advice to Mrs Reese?

Undoubtedly she and Mr Reese have their children's best interest as a priority at all times, and they retained intelligent counsel that will guide them safely through their legal problems.

For all our well intentioned advice, I am sure they are now very aware and sensitive to the ways that public behavior can cause them trouble, they might actually know better how to handle their personal affairs, than any of us do.

[Iris777]

I agree that we may not be helping the Reeses but I also think it's a valuable object lesson. I'm not speaking of the Reeses specifically. Just because an ex has been told to "mind their own business" doesn't mean they will. Just because the court can say it's not a problem, doesn't mean an ex will see it the same way and let it go. A determined ex, whether motivated by anger, jealousy or true worry for the child's welfare may not see it as cut and dry. It isn't the same as the state going in and removing a child from a drug addicted mother and then giving them back when rehab has been completed. That is the state. An ex spouse (male or female) with time and means can keep a custody situation going on for a long time. The reason doesn't even have to be valid. The point is that they can keep making a person miserable and humiliated if they so desire. That in itself may be the goal.

[bubbajack]

I feel very compassionate and protective of the reeses and their current state of mind and emotion. I do not want them to have to read endless warnings about what could happen based on other peoples' limited perspectives on what's happened to our beloved sexy adventurous hotwifing friends. So in a way I hope that they, at least, have adjusted to the situation enough that they can read the posts in this thread without being upset. Or ignore them if not.

On the other hand, as Iris points out, there are many more people than the reeses who may be reading these posts and getting good suggestions and bad ones to ponder and apply to their own hotwifing lives. Even reading through suggestions that are mostly inapplicable or even ridiculously so can be valuable. Sometimes we learn more about ourselves when we reject outside opinions than when we find something positive in them.

So, reeses, I hope you can see that even the comments that seem to be less than sympathetic to your actual situation are potentially as much a community resource as the ones that express unlimited affection and compassion for you and what has happened.

For myself, I would rather send you warmth and affection until you PM me saying "ENOUGH, already!! " (that may already have happened). But other things people are saying, even if they aren't particularly helpful to you can be, sometimes in odd ways, helpful to the rest of us.

After all, it is true that our main reason for being on this site is not something that many people would understand or endorse. And that means we each have to forge a way of living that keeps us safe and productively engaged with a society that would have us denounced and stoned in the public square if some folks had their way!

[susanshusband]

Thanks Mrs.P for being there.
I wonder if he would have made such a big deal out of this if he knew you and I were lovers?
Oh, did i fail to mention that that would make my day!! Mrs.R and Mrs.P

I had an idea that I shared with my hubby today.
I wonder if I was to contact one of my previous lovers, explain the situation to them, and maybe have some one on one at my home with them.

We disagreed over whom I would feel most comfortable with.

We need some advice!!!!

Who would you suggest?

I am curious

The personal trainer would be nice. I think because you have been so naughty you should be handcuffed to the bed and all of your former lovers invited over for some "one on one" in serial fashion to get the naughy out. This should satisfy the court that you are reformed and monogamous again!

[mrs_reese]

Everyone!!
I know you all care about me.
That means so much to me.
Friends that I have never seen, but so close to me.
All the advice and opinions, I don't mind.
It makes me realize that you care.
Mrs.P, your posts hit home.
I totally agree with you about Gay Pride, why not hotwife/cuckold hubbys.
It makes me so mad the way society places values on some things but shame on others.
Gay is cool today. I agree, it's about time!!
Why not hotwives??

On vacation this past weekend.
I didnt feel like playing.
Hubby and had a very relaxing time.
We went to a really neat Jazz club/martini bar on Friday.
Saturday morning, we ordered room service, and fucked all day.
It was nice to be kinky with hubby/ just us!
I particularily enjoyed being bent over in the bathroom as the maid made our bed.

Again; thanks everyone.

I am confused still.
I so want to have a lover in my life.
I am scared that I am getting used to a normal vanilla marriage again.
It's nice to be Mom and Wife instead of Mom, Hotwife and Wife.

But at the end of the day, I need my men!