What are your rules?

[spiffysteffy]

Check the box if its allowed, leave it blank if it's not. No rules? Check all boxes. If you have any rules not mentioned please mention them in a comment.

[2inUPMichigan]

We don't have rules for sex. There is no list between us of what is "allowed" or "not allowed".
I can't check all boxes either LOL as some are things I personally won't do.
We have respect and safety guidelines which include no overnights and condoms as a requirement.
We do have other safety guidelines including not giving out our address and phone number nor our last name. No one comes to our house either to protect our privacy.

[SSQ]

We don't do rules. We treat each other with trust and respect.

Adults should not have rules for each other, period, so I don't think that saying "no rules" means check them all. It means we disagree with your premise. In addition, choices about what we do or not do, have nothing to do with rules.

People can have their own personal boundaries, but you cannot put a boundary on someone else- then it's a rule, and that is controlling. I think that involves going at things backwards if you just make rules rather than actually talking about your feelings and thoughts.

[Her number1]

We don't really have rules.
Farmgirl gets to play how and when she wants. I trust her to put us first so, there are no rules needed. If I couldn't trust her, I wouldn't need rules. I would need work on our relationship.

[rspanked]

No rules here either. The basis of our relationship is our love for each other and we're super turned on by each other's happiness and excitement, so we go where those values take us.

[IslandtimePIB]

No rules. We just let it go where it goes. She knows that I'm having as much fun as she is. I still remember the first time our friend went down on her. She was obviously enjoying it but looked over at me to see how I was. I gave her a big smile and she closed her eyes and exploded in his face

[Ferdinand]

I love that last story almost as much as I love the chorus of “no rules.” I realize that couples need to find their own ways, and for some, rules may be necessary and valuable. But my best experiences have all revolves around couples who embraced the commitment to trust one another to include their love for each other in each decision made along the way, granting complete freedom of choice to one another. I have felt honored to be included in those trusting relationships, and I try to repay that trust accordingly.

[Cumcpl]

We don't really have rules, we only have things that turns us on. Like my wife enjoys me watching, so sex without me is not something she wants.

[Very Hot Wife]

We don't really have many rules, just the ones that I left unchecked above.

So no bareback with new lovers and no pregnancy risks. Apart from that Becky is free to do what she wants when she is with a guy, I trust her implicitly.

We've discussed just about every possible scenario and as we both enjoy the same things, it's easy for us.

Surprised only 11% allow kissing, or am I reading it wrong...?

[CURVYWIFE]

Our rules is she lets me know.

[afagehi7]

We don't really have many rules, just the ones that I left unchecked above.

So no bareback with new lovers and no pregnancy risks. Apart from that Becky is free to do what she wants when she is with a guy, I trust her implicitly.

We've discussed just about every possible scenario and as we both enjoy the same things, it's easy for us.

Surprised only 11% allow kissing, or am I reading it wrong...?

I don't get the no kissing thing. I think her making out with a guy is hot. I mean, they are willing to let a guy cum in her mouth or pussy but she can't kiss them. It doesn't make sense to me. I think kissing is less intimate than a dick in the mouth. I'm not sure many women would be able to get into it without kissing because it's such a large part of foreplay.

Maybe someone who actually has a hotwife can comment. Especially if his hotwife doesn't kiss but still does all other hotwife activities.

[Flirtywifeshubby]

We don't have any rules. Flirtywife is free to do whatever she is comfortable with.

[CURVYWIFE]

Ditto here

[husband1110]

We don't really have many rules, just the ones that I left unchecked above.

Surprised only 11% allow kissing, or am I reading it wrong...?

I don't get the no kissing thing. I think her making out with a guy is hot. I mean, they are willing to let a guy cum in her mouth or pussy but she can't kiss them. It doesn't make sense to me. I think kissing is less intimate than a dick in the mouth. I'm not sure many women would be able to get into it without kissing because it's such a large part of foreplay.

That's what the table reports, but the percentages appear to represent the number of times a specific item (kissing in your example) was selected relative to the total number of times ALL items were checked. That "percentage" does not really tell us anything. If one assumes that oral is allowed by all repondents (a relatively safe bet), then the percentage of respondents who say kissing is allowed would be 25/26 (at the present time) or 96%. Hope this helps with the confusion.

[afagehi7]

We don't really have many rules, just the ones that I left unchecked above.

Surprised only 11% allow kissing, or am I reading it wrong...?

I don't get the no kissing thing. I think her making out with a guy is hot. I mean, they are willing to let a guy cum in her mouth or pussy but she can't kiss them. It doesn't make sense to me. I think kissing is less intimate than a dick in the mouth. I'm not sure many women would be able to get into it without kissing because it's such a large part of foreplay.

That's what the table reports, but the percentages appear to represent the number of times a specific item (kissing in your example) was selected relative to the total number of times ALL items were checked. That "percentage" does not really tell us anything. If one assumes that oral is allowed by all repondents (a relatively safe bet), then the percentage of respondents who say kissing is allowed would be 25/26 (at the present time) or 96%. Hope this helps with the confusion.

It seems to be the number selected out of total votes so 25/222 is 11%. So yes, the survey isn't properly configured

[IndyGreg]

We don't have any actual rules, however Becky won't allow pics or vids nor will she do anal.

[Hungry4IT]

We have no rules either. More or less saftey precausions and things we are not into.

Always use condoms, never give last names, addresses or phone numbers(unless something turns very long-term) and get tested regularly.

Not into choking, waterworks or hardcore bdsm humiliation and pain, or anal. My wife also wants me involved as we love the 3 some sex. We are open to meeting alone with long-term partners. We also always group chat so we can both judge a man's character and so we can keep an eye out for NRE getting out of hand.

Otherwise my BlueGodess is free to choose and act as she pleases. We discuss everything as we roll along and find "rules" as described in checklist as a sighn of people's lack of trust or personal insecurities.

I trust my girl more than anyone in the world. I don't see how I could impose rules on her and expect an open honest expression off her sexuality to be possible

To us its all about the trust, love and communication

[afagehi7]

Not that I've managed to cross the threshold to hotwifing yet but the only rule that came up in our discussion was no love or related emotional /poly behavior. Emotional support and love is the marriage.

[myhotwifeinmd]

Interesting. Pregnancy risk is so low. I'm not a fan, but thought it was more popular.

[lookingne]

Our three rules were simple.

1-She could do whatever she wanted and whomever she wanted, as long as I knew where she was and she was safe.

To do this, she was required to have a tracker turned on for her cell phone and to (PROMPTLY) reply to my text messages or I would come knocking. Playtime would end immediately and without question If that happened. She was required to tell her dates about me texting and why it was important to reply quickly.

If it was someone I deemed safe (usually someone she was with several times before) she could play without me knowing then tell me later. There were about ten people on that list.

I should also explain that my "checking in" text messages were usually about 20 minutes into their meeting up initially or if she went to someone's house or apartment. She would send the address, apartment or hotel room number, easily verifying the location with her phone tracker.

I usually would get a reply message to indicate if there was any potential for playing with the first text. After that, my texting was each hour or so, depending on the situation or if she asked me to hold off.

Sometimes she would text with small details which she would fill in when she got home. Each of her replies would indicate she was safe. If I questioned any reply as being generic "I'm okay" she had two words used to verify as being her. She had a safe word to let me know there was a problem and she wanted help getting out of the situation.

2-No overnight dates were allowed since I did not want to fall asleep while she was with a new person. It's pretty hard to text if I'm asleep.

3- Post date required sharing all the details about the date. It took a while for her to do this well as she is a person who is mostly into the moment. Her stories got more descriptive and she got comfortable enough to think of me... she would sometimes text or save photos or videos or video chat while playing.

Only twice did I have to come knocking to break up the party. Not bad considering she played with 128 men and 14 women during her three year quest.

[niftychunk]

Lookigne, I sure would like something that proficient to ensure her safety, If I was ever to lease my wife.

I cannot agree more with that "safe word" to recognize that it was indeed your wife texting. Though my wife will not be going by herself, that safe word is a real need to have agreed. Above the heat of the moment actions and noises, we as a couple will have as STOP secret word, to work both ways. And stop is deal breaker.

We have not taken the first step yet, we are gathering momentum, absolute rookies. But we have agreed to the things that we checked in the survey. By no means we would accept abuse, pain or denigration of either one.

Sadly, I am the most limited in this adventure. If she would want to play by herself, it would be killing the whole experience for me. I would go straight from heaven to hell if she was to be on her own; furthermore, she already knows that if her, prompted by whatever circumstance that arises, would ask for even a short, transitory, never-again clearance to go by herself, the mere request would be unbearable for me and trash-can everything the second it arises. Simply, it is a limit for me and will not switch.

Ok, call me insecure; but fun HAS TO BE for BOTH. If one is left without fun, the other agrees not to continue that way. The fact is that my pleasure would derive from witnessing hers, so being deprived from it just blows it all up for me. I can stay silent, out of the way, wait my turn until it comes. But there. She knows this, and matching me, wants to see my live reactions to her being fucked; she makes her point in that she wants me participating, but I have my apprehensions on the feasibility of it, specially in her first times around.

Furthermore, she has designated me to make the meeting arrangements. She would feel cheap if she saw herself hunting for a male, for she never has had to. So the choosing would be a couple thing too, and we both roleplay it a lot, real often.

My personal feeling about my angel wife having sex with another person, is that I will not be "providing, sharing her". My figure is that I would be giving her the greatest gift I can, and to the furthest extent my limitations permit, by PROVIDING her the opportunity to sample to the greatest extent, the charms of a horny, lust-crazed stranger to PLEASURE HER. We do not envision her as "owned" by any means by me, less by a guy who is just invited to skim her life for her convenience. SHE is the Queen, it is all about her.

Another reason for me being there is her safety, as a stranger is a box of surprises. Besides, we would be out of our world, in a strange land that makes it all more difficult to secure. I will simply not risk her getting abused or overpowered because I was not there to defend her.

Dating by herself, in any type, is a nono for us. She wants the thrill of conquering, but will not develop a "connection" with the guy; connection is OURS and period.

We are Latins, with extended family. We could not stand this playing be discovered by our youngsters. Thus, another thing we have agreed is to begin by making it a holiday thing. In vacations, whatever happens there, stays there. But this is theory, as I am learning here that the roller coaster will not stop once it starts the ride, and the turns and twists will be absolutely wild and unexpected. This is maybe the main drawback that has stopped us in the past.

I am preparing a thread with this bits and pieces and more, to begin in our own, as not only rules are the odds we want to boundary as much as possible.

Cheers, Jorge

[The_Lion]

Our only rule really is no overnights. This rule exists not because of trust or intimacy issues or anything like that. I struggle with sleep bad. I take meds for it and it usually takes days for me to fall asleep naturally. Clinical insomnia is one of the reasons I am a medical marijuana card holder. Smelling her and feeling her body next to me really helps me sleep. The one time I sent her away with friends I went that weekend without sleep.


Other than that, our wants from this lifestyle have been communicated and are completely compatible. I don't have to set any more rules as I know she puts us first and wouldn't put our marriage in danger for a spot of fun.

[afagehi7]

Our only rule really is no overnights. This rule exists not because of trust or intimacy issues or anything like that. I struggle with sleep bad. I take meds for it and it usually takes days for me to fall asleep naturally. Clinical insomnia is one of the reasons I am a medical marijuana card holder. Smelling her and feeling her body next to me really helps me sleep. The one time I sent her away with friends I went that weekend without sleep.


Other than that, our wants from this lifestyle have been communicated and are completely compatible. I don't have to set any more rules as I know she puts us first and wouldn't put our marriage in danger for a spot of fun.

I know your insomnia hell. No med marijuana in Savannah. Meds don't help me either, just make me feel drugged. Latest try was lunesta... nothing but a bad taste. If you know of a med that works, please PM me

[XYAlpha]

We didn't have "rules" but rather "agreements". These mostly reflected personal boundaries - out in the open - that the other could respect as an act of faith.
We agreed on always using condoms for intercourse (sti/pregnancy risk), safety (knowing who, when, where), providing details, absolutely no overnights, and that she would always keep me focused as her #1. BOTH of us agreed to this.

In hindsight, I wish we had more.

Before the VHW's pile on, "more" in this case was not about "control" as they weren't rules anyway. More agreements about boundaries and issues that affect the marriage and my safety.

An agreement is just that - parties agree to act in ways that are comfortable and respectful to ach other.

XY

[annsman]

Like most of the posters we don’t have rules of what she can do. Ann doesn’t do anal because she doesn’t like it and doesn’t use condoms as we both want his sperm inside her.

We both want Ann to make love, not just fuck, so I wouldn’t dream of trying to restrict her. Overnights or time away are ok if they fit in with our lifestyle which is not always easy with kids.

Out of respect for each other she always asks if it’s ok to see her boyfriend although she knows I will agree.