Her Plan to Dip Toe in Hotwife Water

[anonymister1948]

I've been reading this thread since its inception. The psychological journey has really been fascinating to see and for us to sit on the couch and kibitz. That said, how do you figure SW's less than honest past fits in with all this? Looking back, it seems the only reason she agreed to do the limited hotwifing she's done is that you caught her red-handed with Mr. B. She could have indeed NOT enjoyed what little she did. She was doing her penance?

What do you expect to gain when you are all done with this current round of therapy? For me, it would be to get to the bottom of why SW has been shady so that it doesn't happen again. It seems your cuckold kink was super-charged when you discovered the Mr. B affair. That affair was the catalyst and precursor to where you are today. But it didn't indicate any desire on her part to carry on. I would think long and hard about WHY that happened with Mr. B (and may have happened since). In my view, that's really the 800-pound gorrila in the room.

[afagehi7]

I've been reading this thread since its inception. The psychological journey has really been fascinating to see and for us to sit on the couch and kibitz. That said, how do you figure SW's less than honest past fits in with all this? Looking back, it seems the only reason she agreed to do the limited hotwifing she's done is that you caught her red-handed with Mr. B. She could have indeed NOT enjoyed what little she did. She was doing her penance?

What do you expect to gain when you are all done with this current round of therapy? For me, it would be to get to the bottom of why SW has been shady so that it doesn't happen again. It seems your cuckold kink was super-charged when you discovered the Mr. B affair. That affair was the catalyst and precursor to where you are today. But it didn't indicate any desire on her part to carry on. I would think long and hard about WHY that happened with Mr. B (and may have happened since). In my view, that's really the 800-pound gorrila in the room.

No sense in bringing that gorilla to the party at this time. Nothing good can come from it until progress is made in other areas.

Why did it happen? Mr B is a player and knew how to give her the attention she wanted the way she wanted. He knows what he's doing. I don't think it was against fish. It's in the scorpion's nature...

[slenderfish]

I've been reading this thread since its inception. The psychological journey has really been fascinating to see and for us to sit on the couch and kibitz. That said, how do you figure SW's less than honest past fits in with all this? Looking back, it seems the only reason she agreed to do the limited hotwifing she's done is that you caught her red-handed with Mr. B. She could have indeed NOT enjoyed what little she did. She was doing her penance?

What do you expect to gain when you are all done with this current round of therapy? For me, it would be to get to the bottom of why SW has been shady so that it doesn't happen again. It seems your cuckold kink was super-charged when you discovered the Mr. B affair. That affair was the catalyst and precursor to where you are today. But it didn't indicate any desire on her part to carry on. I would think long and hard about WHY that happened with Mr. B (and may have happened since). In my view, that's really the 800-pound gorrila in the room.

Speaking of Mr. B....

We were talking yesterday about my birthday in early summer. She has been asking me what kind of event, whom we will invite, etc. I mentioned a bunch of names, obvious ones, etc. and also Mr. B. She stopped short and asked why I would invite him? She said that "You have an issue with him, I don't support it."

I once again said that my issue with respect to Mr. B is not with him but with her. She looked and acted confused. I told her that I'm frustrated that after all this time and conversation about Mr. B, etc. she still does not "get" that my issue is with her dishonesty. She said we will absolutely get into it with the therapist.

Our next session is today.

[slenderfish]

JFC. Of course she's afraid of her own sexuality. She's suffered nothing but trauma and abandonment due to sex. I suspect there's a lot of healing yet for her to do. Proceed carefully.

THIS.

[slenderfish]

Something got into her yesterday. We hosted a small Super Bowl viewing party and got the house all shined up for it. The construction project is really close to being done! Close enough that she is willing to show it off.

I've installed a pretty solid home theater system. It's been my project for the past few weeks, setting the television screen, positioning the rear speakers for the full surround effect, etc. There's a 15-inch subwoofer hidden inside an open area behind the wall, and two additional in-wall subwoofers in the rear (but these two are not yet hooked up). Also the ceiling surround speakers are not yet installed. Everything is hidden and can be controlled by apps on my phone. Even thought not fully complete, it's really sounding terrific.

The guests were giving compliments to SW and me for the work. One of the major elements of the remodel was that we installed huge windows on the view side of the house, and it's spectacular.

So by halftime, SW was feeling the wine and was in a great mood. She started being super lovey dovey and was sitting in my lap, kissing me, etc. She requested I get my hands back on that dancing pole (retrieve it from Mr. E) and have it available for the next time we host.

After the guests left, she was really in the mood. Once I started the foreplay, she grabbed me and pulled me into the bedroom, and was super into deep kissing and so I specifically focused on making sure we made love in the way she prefers, on her back and covered by my whole body. She had showered and was freshly shaved on her legs and everywhere else. Clean and smooth! She pulled me in and physically responded. I avoided any and all talk about hotwifing and my fantasies, just making it about the two of us and our sexual connection.

Afterward, she was even more touchy and clingy. She wasn't ready to sleep, so she dragged me out to watch some Netflix, and she opened another bottle of wine. But ultimately we put the cork back in and saved most of it for another night.

[lkh96]

SW thank you for your thread. In my years as a member of OHW, I find your thread to be one of the most inspiring and relatable life experience concerning this lifestyle. Marriage is multi dimensional and experiences are truly one's own.
Please continue to update us and best wishes to you and your missus.

[afagehi7]

I avoided any and all talk about hotwifing and my fantasies, just making it about the two of us and our sexual connection.

Afterward, she was even more touchy and clingy. She wasn't ready to sleep, so she dragged me out to watch some Netflix, and she opened another bottle of wine. But ultimately we put the cork back in and saved most of it for another night.

That was the exact right move IMHO

[BallSpanking]

It is very gratifying to read about the lovely and loving time you had with SW. Even, or perhaps especially, when considering HW'ing, it is important to come from, and hold, a loving place.

[anonymister1948]

Speaking of Mr. B....

We were talking yesterday about my birthday in early summer. She has been asking me what kind of event, whom we will invite, etc. I mentioned a bunch of names, obvious ones, etc. and also Mr. B. She stopped short and asked why I would invite him? She said that "You have an issue with him, I don't support it."

I once again said that my issue with respect to Mr. B is not with him but with her. She looked and acted confused. I told her that I'm frustrated that after all this time and conversation about Mr. B, etc. she still does not "get" that my issue is with her dishonesty. She said we will absolutely get into it with the therapist.

Our next session is today.

Talking about this in therapy sounds like a solid plan. I wasn't advocating for rehashing the incidents with Mr. B, but rather finding out what prompted it to happen in the first place. That incident was a picture of her inner workings. What did she get out of it? What prompted her to risk that much whether she fucked him or not? I think the answer to that question is the key for her to open up sexually. My guess is she doesn't know the answer to that question herself.

[slenderfish]

The therapist has her own agenda. She apparently wants SW to figure out her body and sexuality. The other standard therapist stuff is there, but seems to be secondary at this point. Or I should say, she indulges this but does not let it drive the agenda.

She spent more than half the session today letting SW know more about a woman's body, the connection between the mind, the heart, the body, and the sensory systems. She described all the nerve connections within the woman's sexual systems and has started the conversation about SW conceptualizing the ability to achieve vaginal orgasms.

So the conversation about Mr. B will apparently have to wait.

All good from my seat.

[afagehi7]

The therapist has her own agenda. She apparently wants SW to figure out her body and sexuality. The other standard therapist stuff is there, but seems to be secondary at this point. Or I should say, she indulges this but does not let it drive the agenda.

She spent more than half the session today letting SW know more about a woman's body, the connection between the mind, the heart, the body, and the sensory systems. She described all the nerve connections within the woman's sexual systems and has started the conversation about SW conceptualizing the ability to achieve vaginal orgasms.

So the conversation about Mr. B will apparently have to wait.

All good from my seat.

If you trust the therapist you have to trust her methods. If you see her solo you can bring up Mr B so it gets on the docket.

For guys like us it's the deception that matters... Not the sexual act. That's what sw doesn't understand. If she cheated it's all about being honest, we don't care that they got fucked but want to be involved somehow if only on the fringe

[slenderfish]

The therapist has her own agenda. She apparently wants SW to figure out her body and sexuality. The other standard therapist stuff is there, but seems to be secondary at this point. Or I should say, she indulges this but does not let it drive the agenda.

She spent more than half the session today letting SW know more about a woman's body, the connection between the mind, the heart, the body, and the sensory systems. She described all the nerve connections within the woman's sexual systems and has started the conversation about SW conceptualizing the ability to achieve vaginal orgasms.

So the conversation about Mr. B will apparently have to wait.

All good from my seat.

If you trust the therapist you have to trust her methods. If you see her solo you can bring up Mr B so it gets on the docket.

For guys like us it's the deception that matters... Not the sexual act. That's what sw doesn't understand. If she cheated it's all about being honest, we don't care that they got fucked but want to be involved somehow if only on the fringe

Exactly.

[slenderfish]

Update on latest shenanigans. On Friday night, SW mentioned she had to retrieve some shoes from the repair shop across town before they close at 5 p.m. and inquired if I might close out my desk work a bit early and meet her out for happy hour. I was game and asked her to just text me the time and place, once she had it worked out.

She got a bit dolled up, in her casual sort of way, and off she went. I figured she was thinking we would meet at 5:15 but got a text saying she'd met up with her girlfriend Ms. T (the pilot) at a local boutique hotel bar and that I should come by any time, but no later than 5:55. Happy hour ends at 6:00.

I arrived and the girls were on their second glasses of wine. I got a vodka martini and some food items and we settled in. We got interrupted from time to time by the noise from a birthday party group of about 20 people, getting more raucous as time went along.

At about 8:45 Ms. T observed that one of the women in the birthday group is her neighbor. We all got up to leave and in passing the party, the neighbor woman recognized Ms. T and stopped her to visit a bit. SW and I got the courtesy introduction and I then excused myself for a minute to use the restroom.

When I got back, SW had been absorbed in to the birthday party group. I saw Ms. T off to her car, and added time to the meter on my car, and returned to the fun. SW was bonding with the birthday girl. It was a group of good-looking and fit people, just a bit younger than us but close enough. More girls than guys. Not many couples.

Another glass of wine for SW and martini for me.

And so it went, until the group started suggesting an after party at this dive bar with live music. This is a place where SW has adamantly refused to go, ever since we moved to the area over 10 years ago. Just too dive-y for her taste, and kind of known for old guys.

But half of the birthday group wanted to go over there, and SW was surprisingly agreeable, so off we went with this group.

I covered the first round for everybody, as a "happy birthday" to the birthday girl, and got another glass of wine for SW and one of the party girls ordered a double tequila shot for herself and then couldn't drink it, so it went to me by default.

We socialized and danced and then SW was ready for another glass of wine. I switched to coca cola in order to be ready to drive later, and decided to dance a bit. SW got chased off the dance floor by the bouncer because they don't allow wine glasses out there. I kept dancing and she slipped off to the bar and was her social self.

After a bit, I decided to check on her and she was going full happy drunk with three guys, laughing and smiling and shucking and jiving. One of the girls from the party knows these guys, so it was all good.

I joined the conversation just as they were talking about some porn star. The tall guys said to SW "oh, so you are indeed married" or something similar. Typical situation, I show up and the guys are a bit disappointed. But not the tall guy. He was friendly and continued to engage SW. The other guys caught me up on the conversation; the tall guy was formerly a pretty active porn star. I chuckled and decided to let the group have SW for a bit, and went back to the dance floor to rejoin some of the remaining birthday group.

The band finished their set and went on break. I caught SW's eye and she indicated readiness to get out of there. The three guys were gone. She was pretty happy drunk, and I helped her grab her things as she was texting something and not paying attention to me. I was curious and took a quick glance at what she was doing, and I saw an unknown number and the text jumped out at me.

"COME FUCK ME"

[afagehi7]

Update on latest shenanigans. On Friday night, SW mentioned she had to retrieve some shoes from the repair shop across town before they close at 5 p.m. and inquired if I might close out my desk work a bit early and meet her out for happy hour. I was game and asked her to just text me the time and place, once she had it worked out.

She got a bit dolled up, in her casual sort of way, and off she went. I figured she was thinking we would meet at 5:15 but got a text saying she'd met up with her girlfriend Ms. T (the pilot) at a local boutique hotel bar and that I should come by any time, but no later than 5:55. Happy hour ends at 6:00.

I arrived and the girls were on their second glasses of wine. I got a vodka martini and some food items and we settled in. We got interrupted from time to time by the noise from a birthday party group of about 20 people, getting more raucous as time went along.

At about 8:45 Ms. T observed that one of the women in the birthday group is her neighbor. We all got up to leave and in passing the party, the neighbor woman recognized Ms. T and stopped her to visit a bit. SW and I got the courtesy introduction and I then excused myself for a minute to use the restroom.

When I got back, SW had been absorbed in to the birthday party group. I saw Ms. T off to her car, and added time to the meter on my car, and returned to the fun. SW was bonding with the birthday girl. It was a group of good-looking and fit people, just a bit younger than us but close enough. More girls than guys. Not many couples.

Another glass of wine for SW and martini for me.

And so it went, until the group started suggesting an after party at this dive bar with live music. This is a place where SW has adamantly refused to go, ever since we moved to the area over 10 years ago. Just too dive-y for her taste, and kind of known for old guys.

But half of the birthday group wanted to go over there, and SW was surprisingly agreeable, so off we went with this group.

I covered the first round for everybody, as a "happy birthday" to the birthday girl, and got another glass of wine for SW and one of the party girls ordered a double tequila shot for herself and then couldn't drink it, so it went to me by default.

We socialized and danced and then SW was ready for another glass of wine. I switched to coca cola in order to be ready to drive later, and decided to dance a bit. SW got chased off the dance floor by the bouncer because they don't allow wine glasses out there. I kept dancing and she slipped off to the bar and was her social self.

After a bit, I decided to check on her and she was going full happy drunk with three guys, laughing and smiling and shucking and jiving. One of the girls from the party knows these guys, so it was all good.

I joined the conversation just as they were talking about some porn star. The tall guys said to SW "oh, so you are indeed married" or something similar. Typical situation, I show up and the guys are a bit disappointed. But not the tall guy. He was friendly and continued to engage SW. The other guys caught me up on the conversation; the tall guy was formerly a pretty active porn star. I chuckled and decided to let the group have SW for a bit, and went back to the dance floor to rejoin some of the remaining birthday group.

The band finished their set and went on break. I caught SW's eye and she indicated readiness to get out of there. The three guys were gone. She was pretty happy drunk, and I helped her grab her things as she was texting something and not paying attention to me. I was curious and took a quick glance at what she was doing, and I saw an unknown number and the text jumped out at me.

"COME FUCK ME"

Oh what a cliffhanger!!! Can't wait to find out what this is about

[solstice]

Would it be fair to say that your wife likes a good party!

[ExiledSage]

A second phone? Slipped up while drunk? More detective work needed.

[CuriousOne36]

Wow. Very interesting. Can’t wait to see where this leads.

[funcpl477]

It will be very interesting to see how this plays out - whether sw is open and honest with sf about it - and if she follows through and fucks the guys..

So sf, catch us up - am gonna hit refresh a lot today!

[afagehi7]

A second phone? Slipped up while drunk? More detective work needed.

I didn't see anything about a second phone?

[BallSpanking]

Whatever it was, it left her hot.

[rooster444]

Worthy of taking a look at the text thread while she's in the shower...check the phone number and Google it. Either she doesn't want to share her experiences or she is hesitant to act - either way it would be interesting to see who is so comfortable asking so directly. A past porn star? I wish my wife would meet a few!

[JeffBingham]

Worthy of taking a look at the text thread while she's in the shower...check the phone number and Google it. Either she doesn't want to share her experiences or she is hesitant to act - either way it would be interesting to see who is so comfortable asking so directly. A past porn star? I wish my wife would meet a few!

There won’t be any text thread. She consistently deletes all texts according to SF’s previous posts.

[MatureCouple]

I'm really curious as to what provoked the "COME FUCK ME" text. Obviously the sender knew he could send it, and she would probably be receptive towards it.

[afagehi7]

Hopefully fish is monitoring the situation closely. Hotwife activity is great, cheating is grounds for dismissal.

Why she won't share with fish is beyond me.

Prediction: she says she was just joking around with one of her female friends...

[ExiledSage]

A second phone? Slipped up while drunk? More detective work needed.

I didn't see anything about a second phone?

My bad--read quickly-- and read it as she was texting and he received the "Come FUCK me" text from an unknown number.