It might actually happen after years of telling me no.

[vicouple]

Accidental double post

[SomeoneCuckMe]

And if denial makes them happy?

It doesnt take a rocket scientist mate… my advice was to follow his happiness. Thats what matters most.

[william70]

Sounds really selfish to me. To each their own.

[Seekingmore12]

What is now taking place for you is how my marriage ended. Right down to the longer visits and soft pedalling the feelings. I found out later he was constantly having them fantasize about what it would be like to live together during sex, eye contact, etc. If it is the same game, he also will be having her discuss with him all of your non-sexual faults. All part of the wedging (and part of a standard sales technique as it embeds the thought in the person's head)

Exactly, I agree, it’s all part of the game S is playing, he is getting off on it as well as your wife. Many stories here about this and the consequences of choosing the wrong guy.

He is driving a wedge, between you and Lana and eventually your heart.

Put yourself in his shoes, really think about it, during cuddle time what would you talk about…..

It’s all up to Lana now, let’s all hope she chooses wisely.

[veub]

Sounds really selfish to me. To each their own.

He should, or for that matter, she should remain in a relationship that makes him, or her, unhappy? To me that sounds insane.

It's striking on this thread that all the cheerleaders are now being outnumbered by those with caution.

[william70]

Sounds really selfish to me. To each their own.

He should, or for that matter, she should remain in a relationship that makes him, or her, unhappy? To me that sounds insane.

It's striking on this thread that all the cheerleaders are now being outnumbered by those with caution.

So let me get this right. You think that W should dump her after a one month fling they orchestrated together instead of trying to save his 15yr marriage?

[veub]

No. He should try to save the marriage.
To do that he has to/try to end all contact with Shawn, who, if this account is accurate, I suspect she has been, at least emotionally, involved with long before he became aware of "cheating" incident. But we all know that he will not do that.
My issue is that "happiness" is not something often mentioned on this board: people here trade or confuse sexual excitement with happiness while reveling in pain.

[Mr JnJ Doe]

The only rule we have is, if he ever says anything about her leaving me, it ends at that moment. It happened once and she cut off all contact and blocked him.

[Seekingmore12]

W’s pattern has changed, he would have based on his history updated us after lunch with Lana, he has not. I am taking this as a hopeful sign.

[Whosbeensleeping]

W’s pattern has changed, he would have based on his history updated us after lunch with Lana, he has not. I am taking this as a hopeful sign.

Tend to agree with this.

[TheHammer]

W’s pattern has changed, he would have based on his history updated us after lunch with Lana, he has not. I am taking this as a hopeful sign.

Hopefully they see focused on each other this afternoon instead of bulls and internet message boards

[gesdell]

The only rule we have is, if he ever says anything about her leaving me, it ends at that moment. It happened once and she cut off all contact and blocked him.

I agree with your statement and I would add that W should have a plan in case she leaves him for Shawn. I also believe that the relationship between Shawn and Lana would not last long because right now everything is exciting and he can dominate her during their short time together, but if they lived together that would change some of the relationship dynamic. This lifestyle can be exciting, just like skydiving, but every once in a while the main chute doesn't open. Let's hope that none of this actually happens and Lana and W enjoy this experience together.

[slenderfish]

W770, this is the ultimate cuckold fantasy but of course if the ultimate risk wasn't present, it wouldn't be the ultimate.

I'd suggested some days ago that introducing Eric is a good idea/good sign that to Lana this is just for the hotwife/cuckold lifestyle. Sorry to hear that it couldn't be accomplished before this sidetracking. But none of this is surprising.

I'd like to understand why the Eric element has changed. This may be a key item of information.

It's pretty much in your court, as to how this proceeds. Some options from my seat:

1) You play it out and give Lana and yourself the gift of her falling in "Love" (read: excessive lust) with Shawn, knowing deep down inside of you that she will always remain yours. This is pretty much where you have been fertilizing with your support, with letting her continue with the "cheat" version of it wherein she gets to hold secrets for days at a tie, etc. As noted by one commenter above, this is really the purest path of the cuckold.

2) You suddenly lose your cool and overreact, getting in her face, introducing anger and negativity into her blissful place. Resentment and communication breakdown are the most obvious initial results. Then what do you have?

3) You find some middle ground, perhaps acknowledging Lana's feelings and telling her you want to support, but at the same time you need her recognize you are naturally feeling extra anxious, to the point where it's getting unmanageable. So perhaps she can have empathy for you and come back your way a bit for a little while, until you are more settled, while still seeing Shawn (e.g. reducing the acceleration). Perhaps request the Eric element, using it as a safety valve to limit Shawn's influence. If Lana and Shawn are not willing to keep it primarily sexual and include Eric, preferring instead to the point where Eric is excluded, then it's too much.

Finally, I'll point out to you and all the other readers, that Shawn is in this for himself. He doesn't know how to love a woman (or anybody, based on what I can deduce). He's just considering Lana (and you) as his greatest conquest, to be able to brag to his friends. Even if he believes he is in love with Lana, he is not. You and Lana have to realize, at some level, that he'll never be able to make Lana happy. Also that he now has proven he is not one to share. The Eric blow job and the Zoom calls are apparently merely to establish props for his future bragging, once he is done.

He will want to take her, to possess her, to eliminate you, and to believe he is Prince Charming when all he really has is a big dick (and that he's just that, a big dick). Then he will treat her as his possession, and she will suffer.

Lana is the only one who can temper this without it getting messy.

[proudhusb217]

W’s pattern has changed, he would have based on his history updated us after lunch with Lana, he has not. I am taking this as a hopeful sign.

Hopefully they see focused on each other this afternoon instead of bulls and internet message boards

This, for sure. No news is good news if he's spending time with Lana.

[setv4]

We're about to go out to get some lunch to talk more and then have to get back to work but these are the quick points of the talk so far:

- She loves him
- They told each other they love each other last night and this morning
- They made love last night and this morning instead of "fuck"
- Shawn wants to call off the threesome this weekend because he doesn't want Eric to have her. He also wants me not to make love to her anymore but understands that as her husband, that's not something he can realistically expect and he's fine with the once a week he believes we make love.
- I asked if it's different from the love she feels for me and she said it's very different. We have a solid foundation, a history of 15 years of memories, and he will never compare. She described that the love she has for him is like how she felt in the beginning of our relationship.
- She admitted that it might be NRE and that him moving back to California will be good as it will give her time to evaluate if she's just feeling lust and the excitement of the moment rather than truly being in love with him
- We don't know what this weekend will involve but it looks like no Eric. It's either me watching them on our bed, or we might not see him at all just to give ourselves some breathing room.

I personally think that it's time to tell Shawn to "Take A Walk" and to stay the Fuck away from You & Lana, It's time to end this Seduction of Lana by Shawn, which by his recent actions, shows that his purpose, almost from the beginning, has been to Take Your Wife away from You & destroy a Loving Marriage.

It has become too dangerous to your Marriage & to the Love that You have for Lana & the Love that she has for You. It seems that from early in their relationship, Shawn has been actively trying to Knock Lana up, & recently more so. Doing so to ensure that She will stay with Him, which would be especially easier to do if She is carrying His child, Leaving You in the dust, with a destroyed marriage, and a lost Love of Your Life.

Just because You and Lana wanted to add some spice to your relationship, doesn't give Shawn the right to try to take Lana away from You!
Fuck Him!
In no uncertain terms, should Lana or You have anything to do with him anymore, let Shawn find his own woman to Love, Lana is Not that woman.
This is only My opinion, and my thoughts on what I would do, if someone like Shawn, with whom My Wife & I decided to let Her be "Shared With" and tried to take Her away from Me!
Good Luck W & Lana, Be Very Careful and let Your Love for Each other prevail!

[w770]

Thanks for all of the advice and encouragement today. We took a longer lunch that we had originally planned, called off any work we had scheduled and spent the afternoon talking and making love. I'll address as many of the points made, sorry if I can't get to all of them, but I have read everything and shared the sentiments with Lana for feedback. Some of you are incredibly perceptive and made great points.

Update: There was talk about the first time Shawn fucked Lana and how there might be more of the story than she had me believe. I told her that I wouldn't judge her, but I needed to know if there was anything that I didn't know about it. As it turns out, there were details left out. She in fact did give him an invite up a few days before they did the deed. She told him at the gym one morning that I tend to take the dogs out after work around the same time every night and that I'm usually gone for about 20-30 minutes. So the evening it happened, she texted him the second I left the apartment. So it wasn't a surprise encounter, but instead, they both knew and planned for it to happen. However, as it happened in the way she told me was accurate - she blew him in the kitchen, he ate her pussy on the counter, and then bent her over and fucked her in the kitchen.

Another question I wanted to address was whether she felt guilt telling him that she loved him last night. I was curious about this too and when I asked her, she said that in the moment, no. But after she said it, yes. I didn't give a description of their love making last night but apparently, it was exclusively sweet and intense, but not the aggressive fucking that was common for them. They did it in mostly missionary and the lotus position (her on top while he sat up so they could make out while she grinded back and forth). They were in missionary when he said it first, and he withheld giving her an orgasm until she said it back to him. When she reciprocated, "I love you, Shawn" he responded by making her cum and kissing her passionately. Instead of moaning his name over and over, she told him she loved him while she was cumming, as she pulled him in as close and as tight as she could with her legs and arms. It wasn't until after their simultaneous orgasm faded did she feel the pangs of guilt over saying it to him.

Another point that needed addressing was the notion of him trying to get her to move out west to be with him or him moving here to the east coast so they could be together. He hasn't mentioned anything about this, however it's still been less than 24 hours since they said that they love each other, so he very well may have spent the day planning a future with her.

We've decided to call this weekend off entirely. She's texted him telling him that she wants to go no contact for a while and she'll reach back out to him at some point. He asked her why, to which she told him that things had gone further than she wanted it to go, and just left it at that. We're going to take it one day at a time, but ultimately, we're planning on seeing how we both feel in a week's time. This also works out in a way because in a week, she'll be on her period for 3 days, so it naturally extends the time they don't reconnect the bond that's made from sex. If I feel like she can have sex with him and have it just be about sex, I might be okay with it moving forward in that capacity until he leaves, but after that, it should end. Otherwise, it should just end altogether and we'll reassess our feelings at a later point. This also means that she won't be having sex with Eric as there's a connection to Shawn and if we end things with Shawn, we'd like for it to be a clean break entirely.

So that's the news for now. We spent some time this afternoon making love. She didn't moan his name or even mention anything related to Shawn, but I know we were both thinking about things other than the moment we were in. The feelings of today are still raw, but ultimately I know we'll be fine. It's just challenging when you're going through the moment to see past the moment.

We just ordered dinner and we'll probably discuss more later tonight, but as of now, it's nice having some quiet.

[MonaLisaOverdrive]

I think you made absolutely the right call here. In your further conversations with Lana this evening, dig into their conversations together and see if there was any of this "wedging" that others have mentioned. It could give you insight into Shawn's intentions and whether allowing them to have sex again is risky even if Lana can keep it just about the sex.

The way he holds off her orgasms until she says "I love you" seems like an attempt to reprogram or associate her feelings with him, I wouldn't be surprised if he conversations are equally as insidious

[Mattmattiass]

I’m glad you’re stopping for a bit. Why did she withhold sex from you in the morning if she felt bad about saying she loved him? For your benefit (because it would turn you on)?

[jasmineb87]

The way he holds off her orgasms until she says "I love you" seems like an attempt to reprogram or associate her feelings with him, I wouldn't be surprised if he conversations are equally as insidious

With things like that I think there’s a fine line between fun and coercive control.

W, take the time with Lana. Remember, you don’t have to go back to the lifestyle. You could go back to the lifestyle with someone other than Shawn. The decision is entirely between you and Lana. We all just want what’s best for your relationship.

[parmaham55]

Total respect and congratulations, our positive thoughts are with you both from all parts of the world. Keep talking.

[setv4]

I think that You Both made the Right decision, Enjoy your Dinner!
I feel that the only thing that is important now is that You Both have what is important to You both...
...that Your Love for each other is still Strong and Intact.
As for adding others to your relationship, for Everyone's mutual benefit & pleasure is all fine and good,
just continue be careful to pick the right person(s), for all that extra Super Hot Fun!

The information that You have Shared with us All can help educate others wanting to include Hotwifing activities in their future.

[Wifesharing]

I’m glad you’re stopping for a bit. Why did she withhold sex from you in the morning if she felt bad about saying she loved him? For your benefit (because it would turn you on)?

There is still a lot to process here before you decide to let her go back to Shawn, I think Shawn is a ass, but we never expected any less. I have always answered in the past when ask about friends fucking my wife I always say well I can be friendly with anyone but I don't think I could consider someone that is fucking my wife my friend. The thing that would bother me more is Lana's behavior we expected Shawn to be this guy but Lana has several times now told you practical stories left things out changed stories. This is what I would be focusing on with moving forward, She might be able to handle this type of thing it could be all of it is her trying to please you but just not able to do it without feelings and then trying to spare your feelings. I would not just quickly take the I love you was only a result of her having her orgasm withheld, she denied that it was said at first sadly its these small things that make trust real hard. I can almost assure you that what you just heard is not the full story it is not even likely the first time it was said between them (I doubt they love each other). I found her not taking ht e phone to record when she went down to the zoom call was a red flag to me as well everything can mean nothing that is why honest communication is key .

I am not saying any of this to make you mad at her I think you are handling this right a hard stop break see what you both can handle and both focus on each other.

[diet_dew_86]

Glad to hear that you've downshifted, at least temporarily. I wonder if S is dealing with angst (I can only hope).

[johnstevens555]

She can never safely go back to superman IMO. You guys can take some time to reassess the situation and try again with someone else if you so choose. But I honestly hope this is the end of the story between Lana and Superman. It only gets uglier and darker from here. For the most part, even the cheerleaders are saying this to a certain extent. That speaks volumes.

[Dharmadude]

You definitely made the right decision. IMO I wouldn't let him have any alone time with her at all, ever again. He has shown his true colors and his intention is, probably from the beginning?, to drive a wedge between you two. You have to have trust with your Dom and he has shown he is not worthy of that.

Take a step back and reassess how you want to continue, or if you even want to at all. I'm glad you stopped it before things got too ugly.