whosbeensleeping wrote: ↑Fri Jul 07, 2023 7:41 pmThat doesn't sound like a situation that's going to get better.
Hopefully you are still working on an exit strategy.
I read this interesting quote:
Narcissism is not a personality disorder but an addiction to activating endorphins through
enmeshment.
April Dawn Harter, LCSW
Let me know if it speaks to you.
All the best.
You're right it's probablt not especially as I'm realising this is how our relationship has always been.
Unfortunately though I feel a bit like a deer in the headlights at the moment. Kind of frozen in place. I'm truly gobsmacked by the behaviours and complete shifts in moods etc, it's really dizzying and disorienting and the lack of sleep last few nights hasn't helped me to see things clearly.
The way that happened on Wednesday night so out of the blue from nothing and so intensely has given me that walking on eggshells feeling. Although (for now) everything seems back to "normal" I’m feeling really anxious. Sitting on the couch today watching some tv (I noticed she's moved back to the other coach now, so we're not sitting on the same one anymore). She was reading something on her phone and let out a small sigh (like exasperated type of sigh) and even that instantly had my stomach turning in knots.
Then later she decided to go outside and do some work (shovelling more soil) and again that had me feeling really uneasy. It's amazing to think how I'm now feeling so anxious by her doing work to the point where I really wished she wouldn't be doing any work. It's really strange how I've come to feel this way, but I do. I actually felt like running out there and grabbing the shovel so that she wouldn't have to do it.
I feel that something is very wrong.
Unfortunately when I spoke to my mum the other night and let her know what was happening she said "You might find you’ll be jumping out of the frying pan and into the fire". Meaning that if I leave I'll end up with someone worse, or in a worse position. Speaking to my mum isn't helping.