Dinner

[sandy691196]

Not sure yet. Im still seeing both of them while I work it out.

My take is - Don't rush into breaking off with your real BF..
This new guy is NEW and hence the NRE and blood rush.
Cheating gets you off. If you break up with your real BF and make the new guy your steady relationship.. then there will be no "cheating" involved.. You may get bored and then look for another diversion.
The "side deal" with its adventure thing appears to turn you on.
You need to give this thing a lot more time to figure things out.
Be careful of not getting "caught" in the meantime.
Don't let the situation force your hand.
And you may wanna consider graduating into pussy play soon. A proper orgasm with a guy helps clarify the chemistry.
You need to work on your sexual values too. Sex is fun. Over thinking stuff makes it complicated and dirty.
If it feels good - do it. Just work out the other things around it so that you don't lose control of your life.
And good sex and love are not necessarily the same thing.

Ya, I took the weekend off from both of them. Except for some occasional txts.
Too emotionally intense.

You are right about the side deal. Its really exciting. Makes me feel really sexy.

I do play with myself to orgasm when I'm with them. Its just I don't let them touch our see my vagina. Same goes with them, I don't touch them. The new guy gets to jerk off in a condom- he had one with him one day when he asked for sex that night, so its become a normal thing for him to wear one now. My boyfriend gets to jerk off normally, but I stop him from finishing sometimes. But I get off myself when I want to.

At this stage, I'm not really interested in braking up with my boyfriend. Its just I feel more attracted to my new boyfriend at the moment. Like you said, it may change in time. I'm not sure I can handle any more guys at this stage. This already feels very exhausting keeping it all a secret.

Namitha.. if you permit me to give you some "advice" and perspective?
From your name it appears that you are of South Indian. origin. Do you still live in some city in the south?
I have observed in your posts that you are very concerned about "reputation" and appearances. I have worked in Banglalore and Chennai and played a lot with local ladies - mostly married.. I have joined couples and sex parties too.
Your reticence with genital play, I am attributing to social conditioning on "sexual values" and "genital chastity".. Notions of "what will the guy(s) think of me if I appear to be easy"!
"Will the word go around that i am easy!"

My experience with southern ladies tells me that sex is rampant. People are really playing hard BUT keeping it under wraps. It's about appearances.

In your case, your original steady BF is unlikely to talk behind your back since it's a "serious" love relationship and she sees you as her steady gf, in love with you.
The new fling won't talk behind your back since he knows you have a steady bf and he can be in a mess if your BF finds out.

So you can get into pussy play (and dick work) fairly safely with both of them. Just make sure that you have a serious talk with the new guy explaining to him this is a classical "cheating" situation. Still you two couldn't help yourself because of the physical chemistry and because of your special friendship bonding... blah blah blah. Make it kinda his responsibility too! He seduced - so he had better take good care that you don't get into trouble with your BF!

Namitha, all the complications of a "cheating" dynamic are only worth it if you get mega kicks.. big time pleasure, as a compensation! Only THAT would make up for all the hassles you are going through.

And do remember to have regular sessions with your original BF..Don't neglect that relationship. It will help you dilute your "guilt" if you know you are showing the guy a good time too.
Temporary lessening of attraction or enchantment with a steady lover is normal when one has a new fling..It doesn't mean that the old relationship is over or the new guy is the ultimate prince charming!

Clear your mind and have a jolly good time with both the guys while things last and opportunities are there..You never know about tomorrow. You are young only once and the future often brings unforeseen trouble.. So live in the moment- don't overthink things- plan and execute your plans sensible..You are on to a good thing..Many girls would feel lucky to be in your situation. Have fun!
Amen!
(and I am sorry if I have given you unsolicited gyan.)

[Whenwillshe]

Correction below

[Whenwillshe]

Damn auto correct

[Whenwillshe]

I hope he asks me again.
My boyfriend knows I went out for dinner. He just doest know how I was thinking about it. I will see him again tonight.
Its ok for me to be so rough with his penis right? Like it wont break or anything?

You can actually cause rupture of the spongy muscle that engorges to cause a penis to become erect.
It is referred to as a fractured penis even though it isn't a bone.
It is actually a medical emergency if it occurs, so yes, you can break it

[namitha157]

Not sure yet. Im still seeing both of them while I work it out.

My take is - Don't rush into breaking off with your real BF..
This new guy is NEW and hence the NRE and blood rush.
Cheating gets you off. If you break up with your real BF and make the new guy your steady relationship.. then there will be no "cheating" involved.. You may get bored and then look for another diversion.
The "side deal" with its adventure thing appears to turn you on.
You need to give this thing a lot more time to figure things out.
Be careful of not getting "caught" in the meantime.
Don't let the situation force your hand.
And you may wanna consider graduating into pussy play soon. A proper orgasm with a guy helps clarify the chemistry.
You need to work on your sexual values too. Sex is fun. Over thinking stuff makes it complicated and dirty.
If it feels good - do it. Just work out the other things around it so that you don't lose control of your life.
And good sex and love are not necessarily the same thing.

Ya, I took the weekend off from both of them. Except for some occasional txts.
Too emotionally intense.

You are right about the side deal. Its really exciting. Makes me feel really sexy.

I do play with myself to orgasm when I'm with them. Its just I don't let them touch our see my vagina. Same goes with them, I don't touch them. The new guy gets to jerk off in a condom- he had one with him one day when he asked for sex that night, so its become a normal thing for him to wear one now. My boyfriend gets to jerk off normally, but I stop him from finishing sometimes. But I get off myself when I want to.

At this stage, I'm not really interested in braking up with my boyfriend. Its just I feel more attracted to my new boyfriend at the moment. Like you said, it may change in time. I'm not sure I can handle any more guys at this stage. This already feels very exhausting keeping it all a secret.

Namitha.. if you permit me to give you some "advice" and perspective?
From your name it appears that you are of South Indian. origin. Do you still live in some city in the south?
I have observed in your posts that you are very concerned about "reputation" and appearances. I have worked in Banglalore and Chennai and played a lot with local ladies - mostly married.. I have joined couples and sex parties too.
Your reticence with genital play, I am attributing to social conditioning on "sexual values" and "genital chastity".. Notions of "what will the guy(s) think of me if I appear to be easy"!
"Will the word go around that i am easy!"

My experience with southern ladies tells me that sex is rampant. People are really playing hard BUT keeping it under wraps. It's about appearances.

In your case, your original steady BF is unlikely to talk behind your back since it's a "serious" love relationship and she sees you as her steady gf, in love with you.
The new fling won't talk behind your back since he knows you have a steady bf and he can be in a mess if your BF finds out.

So you can get into pussy play (and dick work) fairly safely with both of them. Just make sure that you have a serious talk with the new guy explaining to him this is a classical "cheating" situation. Still you two couldn't help yourself because of the physical chemistry and because of your special friendship bonding... blah blah blah. Make it kinda his responsibility too! He seduced - so he had better take good care that you don't get into trouble with your BF!

Namitha, all the complications of a "cheating" dynamic are only worth it if you get mega kicks.. big time pleasure, as a compensation! Only THAT would make up for all the hassles you are going through.

And do remember to have regular sessions with your original BF..Don't neglect that relationship. It will help you dilute your "guilt" if you know you are showing the guy a good time too.
Temporary lessening of attraction or enchantment with a steady lover is normal when one has a new fling..It doesn't mean that the old relationship is over or the new guy is the ultimate prince charming!

Clear your mind and have a jolly good time with both the guys while things last and opportunities are there..You never know about tomorrow. You are young only once and the future often brings unforeseen trouble.. So live in the moment- don't overthink things- plan and execute your plans sensible..You are on to a good thing..Many girls would feel lucky to be in your situation. Have fun!
Amen!
(and I am sorry if I have given you unsolicited gyan.)

I am south Indian origin. But living in Melbourne.
You are right about the conservative values.

Its still a thing keeping your virginity and reputation. Things do go wrong in relationships sometimes and I don't want that stain from the past.

I am avoiding anything vaginal for the reasons above. It is also a thing about allowing a guy to access me.
Most of my girlfriends here and in India are similar.
I am a bit more conservative than most of them.
Most of them are into oral at least. I feel its degrading sucking a penis. I am open to anal some time like some of my friends are- but I am not sure I am ready yet with these guys I am currently with.

I had told the new bf that I have a bf before before our first date. He never asks about him, and I never mentioned him again. So I'm not sure if that means anything more.

I really am enjoying the thrill of this. Been out twice to clubs by myself where I got to dance and grind up with a random guy. One of them kissed up my neck while grinding me against the wall.
Its really exciting to feel so desired.

[sandy691196]

Ok you don't want intercourse as per your personal value system. No one can argue with someone's personal values.
You don't wanna suck on a penis either. Fair enough.
But how about getting your vulva (vagina, clit and the lips) sucked? Believe me.. it beats any other pleasure on earth! Once you taste it - you will be hooked for life.
You can see it as getting a guy to do a chore (further proof of your desirability) rather than "giving him access to you"..
Think it over. And in my experience friends always don't square up with each other. Sometimes they say what the majority want to hear ( the reputation thing).

It's good that the new guy knows about your original BF.. it helps you with keeping him in check, if needed.
Club and bar pick ups can be over the top thrilling! Advantage with strangers is that since they don't know you or your social circle, "reputation" is much easier to protect! And there is no image to live up to.

[namitha157]

I mentioned my bf to him a fee days ago after our date and never heard from him since.

Been feeling a bit down.

[sandy691196]

What happened in that date? We didn't get to hear the interesting part Namitha! Please!

Now that you have learned the thrill of a side piece, you don't need to feel beholden to this one, rather complex guy.

You already know the club scene. The beauty of picking up a "strange"! A guy who doesn't know your social circle, a guy without baggage!
Saturday coming!

[namitha157]

Meeting another guy tonight.
Wish me luck.

I am going to pretend I am single and not mention my bf at all this time.

[sandy691196]

Congratulations Namitha. This new guy is not from your social circle.. right? So it doesn't matter what he knows?
If you score with him, push it on its logical path and keep it casual from the very beginning. No expectations on either side of this being anything more than fun.

[namitha157]

So far so good with the new guy. Spent two hours making out with him in his car today. Got a nice grab at his penis. He is long. And round!
He was quite respectful when I told him i didn't want to go any further. He didn't try to force me or anything.

[sandy691196]

So far so good with the new guy. Spent two hours making out with him in his car today. Got a nice grab at his penis. He is long. And round!
He was quite respectful when I told him i didn't want to go any further. He didn't try to force me or anything.

Good.
"Force" is for mugs! Real men know how to take a woman the right way!
So is he a good kisser? Good tongue play?
Did he do your boobs right? Cupped the right way? No clumsy "grabbing"?
Did you make the next "date"? How did you meet him? Club? Work?

[namitha157]

He was firm and strong with my boobs. But not rough.
Yea he was a great kisser. He really likes my neck.
And I loved the way he scoops and grinds along me. It was like gliding unlike my bf and the last guy that felt like little pokes.

Seeing him again tonight.

I have seen him around the cafe near work for a while now.

[namitha157]

I love that he didn't try to take my top off or get under my clothes. He just got it when I told him the first time.

[sandy691196]

Ideal pick up scenario.. Cafe near work..

Did you have non sexual dates with him first?
Is he too Indian/South Asian or Caucasian?
Was their any talk on personal life, family, friends?

How did the physical thing start? Any expectations talk before that or after the first time?

Have you met your BF after your physical intimacy date with this guy? How did it feel physically? Mentally?

[namitha157]

Ideal pick up scenario.. Cafe near work..

Did you have non sexual dates with him first?
Is he too Indian/South Asian or Caucasian?
Was their any talk on personal life, family, friends?

How did the physical thing start? Any expectations talk before that or after the first time?

Have you met your BF after your physical intimacy date with this guy? How did it feel physically? Mentally?

He is Indian too. He asked a lot of questions about me. Mostly about my work and school.

I have had lunch with him a couple of times before. This time he asked me out for dinner.

We were talking in the car before he dropped me home, and I leant on his shoulder. He put his arm around me. I looked up to him as he kissed my mouth. I jumped on top of him and...

I met my bf yesterday. Watched him jerk off to get it out of the way Still felt this new guys warmth this morning.

[sandy691196]

Ideal pick up scenario.. Cafe near work..

Did you have non sexual dates with him first?
Is he too Indian/South Asian or Caucasian?
Was their any talk on personal life, family, friends?

How did the physical thing start? Any expectations talk before that or after the first time?

Have you met your BF after your physical intimacy date with this guy? How did it feel physically? Mentally?

He is Indian too. He asked a lot of questions about me. Mostly about my work and school.

I have had lunch with him a couple of times before. This time he asked me out for dinner.

We were talking in the car before he dropped me home, and I leant on his shoulder. He put his arm around me. I looked up to him as he kissed my mouth. I jumped on top of him and...

I met my bf yesterday. Watched him jerk off to get it out of the way Still felt this new guys warmth this morning.

Man! That's exciting!
Wish you would help your BF with at least hand jobs now.. you are living life on your terms now..You have side play for kicks..
A bit more intimacy and pampering of BF might be good kama? Good your conscience?

[namitha157]

Ideal pick up scenario.. Cafe near work..

Did you have non sexual dates with him first?
Is he too Indian/South Asian or Caucasian?
Was their any talk on personal life, family, friends?

How did the physical thing start? Any expectations talk before that or after the first time?

Have you met your BF after your physical intimacy date with this guy? How did it feel physically? Mentally?

He is Indian too. He asked a lot of questions about me. Mostly about my work and school.

I have had lunch with him a couple of times before. This time he asked me out for dinner.

We were talking in the car before he dropped me home, and I leant on his shoulder. He put his arm around me. I looked up to him as he kissed my mouth. I jumped on top of him and...

I met my bf yesterday. Watched him jerk off to get it out of the way Still felt this new guys warmth this morning.

Man! That's exciting!
Wish you would help your BF with at least hand jobs now.. you are living life on your terms now..You have side play for kicks..
A bit more intimacy and pampering of BF might be good kama? Good your conscience?

Well I got my bf some condoms the other day and have them to him at the start of our date.
He was so excited!

Then when we were getting hot at night, I told him to put the condom on. He was breathing so hard. He really thought he was going to get my butt hole. Once he got it on I kissed him again and told him to jerk off.

Been letting him jerk off in condoms since.

[sandy691196]

But butt hole one of these days? You know the lube routine.. right?
But that can't happen unless you have had clit play. You need lots of excitement and passion to take it up the ass the first time..

[namitha157]

Maybe one of these days the new guy will be the first.

What do you mean lube routine?

The date was really nice today. Similar to Wednesday, but he was a lot more open to hold me during the date.
Got to have a good feel of his penis through his pants. His penis is really long.

[sandy691196]

Lube routine refers to the need to apply lots of lube (or oil or cream) to his cock and your asshole before you attempt ass fucking. Otherwise it's an impossibility.

The other guy gets to take your anal virginity? Not your bf?
There is a thread here on cucks not getting to take their partners' virginity but others popping their cherries.

There is an old thread on a guy who actually got someone else to take his GF's cherry.

There is an Indian member of OHW, a lady in Australia named "Sana" who has a hot series of posts on that.
How some girls stay virginal with their steady BFs / fiances before marriage but get their virginities taken by other guys..

All hot reading..

[namitha157]

Oh ok I know what you mean. I guess the guy should take care of that right?

I started using a dildo in my butt for the first time yesterday.
I got some glide lube for it. I really liked it. Felt so hot and dirty playing with myself like this after cheating on my bf.

I kind of want to do what you are describing.. and the new guy really turns me on. But I kind of still feel guilty about going that far without my bf.

I saw my bf this morning. I let him have sex with his fleshlight wearing a condom. Took the fleshligt back with me. Didnt really get too hot and kiss him much.. felt like i wanted to keep clean for my new bf.

[sandy691196]

This is insanely hot!

Ok. You are ready for a butt fuck with the new fling. Just 2 points-

1. Butt fucks require a lot of pre-buildup and physical arousal to go through the initial pain. So its advisable to try it after a full oral job on the body, including nipple sucking, navel licking and pussy eating.. then comes anal (with lubes) after the woman is in peak arousal and ready to take the pain.

2. You suggested that the new guy should organise the lubes and all the first time. But that can only happen if you have planned it with him beforehand. Otherwise he wont be prepared with stuff. + not all guys are ready for anal straight off the bat. Many, like me, develop that taste later in life. I absolutely love it now.. since the last 10-12 years. But early in life I hated the idea! So if you leave it to spontaneity in the moment, then the outcome may not be positive. But I do agree that spontaneous stuff is always much more exciting. Since you have already started your physical encounters with him, am sure you do sexting? In that case its easy to ascertain his tastes for anal and get him to prepare stuff.

As for your guilt and conflicts, do remember that this is YOU. Every person is unique and so is their kicks' scenario. You cant live life through other people's values and definitions. Your body and mind won't respond to stuff that may be socially right and alien to your personal chemistry.
Having a side hustle turns you on.. That's your thing. That's my thing too and I can fully empathise with you. Amongst my 3 major, steady relationships in life, I have spontaneously been faithful ONLY in one of them. That's the relationship where from inside I didn't feel like doing anything behind her back - EVEN when she was ok with it (she was a cuck queen)..

Its very hot that you want to give your anal virginity to this new guy.. in a side deal. Lots of Hot Wives in this forum have done that. They have given up their butt cherry to a stranger / new lover / bull after years of regular sex with their primary partners. If you want your first pussy play with this new guy that too is cool. But why not do that with your real BF (pussy play) and go ahead with your plan for getting butt fucked by the new guy? This way you would be doing justice to both your own kink as well as the relationship with your committed partner.

And "wanted to keep clean for my new bf".. isn't a thing! He is just a side piece! You are feeling NRE (New Relationship Energy) with him now! Remember your 1st "cheat" with that other guy? With him too you felt like its a big deal.. remember? Then he dropped out and bingo you have a new side deal! Now you dont even miss that other guy.. Now this new guy is exciting for you. But you don't owe him NOTHING! He is just a new experience - a new dick! Day after tomorrow there will be someone else to fill that slot!

If you owe any thing at all its to your steady BF. Give him pleasure and be kind to him while you explore with flings on the side. I suggest you don't deny your full warmth and attention to your BF for considerations of "keeping clean" for some side piece!

All the best - happy butt fuck!

[namitha157]

This is insanely hot!

Ok. You are ready for a butt fuck with the new fling. Just 2 points-

1. Butt fucks require a lot of pre-buildup and physical arousal to go through the initial pain. So its advisable to try it after a full oral job on the body, including nipple sucking, navel licking and pussy eating.. then comes anal (with lubes) after the woman is in peak arousal and ready to take the pain.

2. You suggested that the new guy should organise the lubes and all the first time. But that can only happen if you have planned it with him beforehand. Otherwise he wont be prepared with stuff. + not all guys are ready for anal straight off the bat. Many, like me, develop that taste later in life. I absolutely love it now.. since the last 10-12 years. But early in life I hated the idea! So if you leave it to spontaneity in the moment, then the outcome may not be positive. But I do agree that spontaneous stuff is always much more exciting. Since you have already started your physical encounters with him, am sure you do sexting? In that case its easy to ascertain his tastes for anal and get him to prepare stuff.

As for your guilt and conflicts, do remember that this is YOU. Every person is unique and so is their kicks' scenario. You cant live life through other people's values and definitions. Your body and mind won't respond to stuff that may be socially right and alien to your personal chemistry.
Having a side hustle turns you on.. That's your thing. That's my thing too and I can fully empathise with you. Amongst my 3 major, steady relationships in life, I have spontaneously been faithful ONLY in one of them. That's the relationship where from inside I didn't feel like doing anything behind her back - EVEN when she was ok with it (she was a cuck queen)..

Its very hot that you want to give your anal virginity to this new guy.. in a side deal. Lots of Hot Wives in this forum have done that. They have given up their butt cherry to a stranger / new lover / bull after years of regular sex with their primary partners. If you want your first pussy play with this new guy that too is cool. But why not do that with your real BF (pussy play) and go ahead with your plan for getting butt fucked by the new guy? This way you would be doing justice to both your own kink as well as the relationship with your committed partner.

And "wanted to keep clean for my new bf".. isn't a thing! He is just a side piece! You are feeling NRE (New Relationship Energy) with him now! Remember your 1st "cheat" with that other guy? With him too you felt like its a big deal.. remember? Then he dropped out and bingo you have a new side deal! Now you dont even miss that other guy.. Now this new guy is exciting for you. But you don't owe him NOTHING! He is just a new experience - a new dick! Day after tomorrow there will be someone else to fill that slot!

If you owe any thing at all its to your steady BF. Give him pleasure and be kind to him while you explore with flings on the side. I suggest you don't deny your full warmth and attention to your BF for considerations of "keeping clean" for some side piece!

All the best - happy butt fuck!

I've never touched a penis before, except through pants or shorts.
It will be my first time touching a dick at all.

He got me down to my panties today. I felt so shy. I have only ever been topless before with guys. He asked me to play with myself while he kissed my body. After I orgasmed he started sucking my fingers before kissing my mouth deep. So dirty and sexy.

I felt his penis through his pants. He smiled at me as i looked at him after looking down at his crotch. I felt so shy knowing he was watching me feeling and thinking about his dick.

I think I would let him have my butt hole if he initiates sex.
He hasnt shown me his dick yet. He did ask if he could rub me, but I declined.

I didnt end up meeting my bf after. I wanted to get home to use my dildo.

[sandy691196]

Wow!

You went home and used the dildo in your ass? In missionary position? Lying on your back?

He stripped you down to your panties in his car? Or was it a better place?

He didn't suggest taking his dick out? See if he initiates sex without prior communication, and you ask him to butt fuck you, he won't be prepared with lubes and all!
It might be smart to carry that gel / lube stuff in your purse..