Reignite the Flame

[Trevose]

viewtopic.php?f=9&t=73486&start=50

Soph in Vegas

Simply stunning!

[QuietHope]

QuietHope, I read this whole thread last night and it inspired me to create an account and share some of my own progress. You have an amazing story. I hope you and your wife and experience this fantasy and make it your reality. The destination is definitely the journey, but we all want to get to the top of the mountain

I’m looking forward to more updates!

viewtopic.php?f=9&t=73486&start=50

Soph in Vegas

Simply stunning!

Thank you both. No updates recently. Life's been busy with work and holidays. Nothing to really report. Be well

[QuietHope]

Do the holidays get your imagination going? We travel and stay with relatives which sounds G rated but there's tantalizing circumstance. The wife going out with old friends for drinks...another night out with cousins...the two of us getting drinks for a date night...dirty older uncles checking her out....some nephews...

[AZguy425]

This is probably the best circumstance for you. She's into the idea of another guy and somewhat active and playing with it, then she's against it and it goes the other way.

Putting her in circumstances where it COULD happen in a semi unplanned way is maybe your best path to the goal.

[QuietHope]

During a little late night play, when I told her she was sexy,she toldme that she felt like she needed to "rediscover" her sexiness. I didn't press but I'm excited.

[vb23456]

Any update?

[Wifepleaser510]

During a little late night play, when I told her she was sexy,she toldme that she felt like she needed to "rediscover" her sexiness. I didn't press but I'm excited.

I may be able to help her with that! ;-)
I'm good at expressing, with words and touch, my appreciation for beautiful, sexy women.
No, I'm not a brute or a horndog who thinks with his little head. Though I do enjoy pleasuring another man's woman.

[QuietHope]

Hey friends. Appreciate you inquiring and your offer Wifepleaser. I do check in here just about every day but haven't had much to share recently. "Dry January" has us staying at home more than normal which has been fine but doesn't offer up too many opportunities for flirtation. Perhaps someone like Wifepleaser is the type of person I need to help get her to cross that line but honestly, its been feeling kind of distant lately and i haven't been pushing.

[Wifepleaser510]

Hey friends. Appreciate you inquiring and your offer Wifepleaser. I do check in here just about every day but haven't had much to share recently. "Dry January" has us staying at home more than normal which has been fine but doesn't offer up too many opportunities for flirtation. Perhaps someone like Wifepleaser is the type of person I need to help get her to cross that line but honestly, its been feeling kind of distant lately and i haven't been pushing.

I appreciate to mention, and I’m happy to help.
However, I have learned from much reading on this site, that, as you seem to know, pushing, may have the opposite of a desired effect.

I do have professional massage skills…

[QuietHope]

Last night she was upset because a dude she works with, a senior VIP-type, got into some email banter with her that got extremely suggestive. Honestly, I'm shocked to see it in 2025. She was legitimately upset and thinks he's slime and of course, I was supportive and angry on her behalf. She's not going to take any action at this time aside from giving him the cold shoulder and hopefully he takes the hint.

But of course, I will share with you all that I spent half the night masturbating about it. Found him on LinkedIn, looked up his socials. Saw that he's divorced. Damn I wish she was interested!

[leggysman]

Damn I wish she was interested!

Sounds like this guy may not be droid you're looking for

In terms of rediscovering her sexiness, I would offer that deliberate flirting in public might be a helpful thing. It's harmless (if she wants it to be) and makes everyone feel good. Most attractive women, whether they do it consciously or not, give off a well-practiced "don't pester me" vibe to strange men, particularly when they are in a relationship. Turning that off probably requires a deliberate decision and a bit of practice.

OTOH I think my own wife is rubbish at IRL flirting (I think she agrees) and could probably do with upping her game in that regard. There have been guys who have piqued her interest, but I've had to coach her to return their looks, smiles, etc. Flirting doesn't seem to come naturally to her. She's hot for a guy at her local hair salon, and he sounds interested, but she just can't seem to give him enough encouragement, and she's too shy to do anything overt like slipping him her number.

[QuietHope]

Do you think its bad to get a bull to seduce her? She wouldn't be doing anything she didn't want to do of course. But there is a deception if I were to plot with the bull without her knowledge, particularly if I were to give him hints on how to act or maybe even give him an idea of where she will be and when so that they meet "spontaneously". I think if I were to introduce him as a bull, that just wouldn't fly.

[leggysman]

I think you already know that very few here will advocate for deception, even though many in Wannabes have contemplated it. I know well how strong this kink is, and we probably all believe that our wives would enjoy this LS if they'd only give it a try. I believed that, and I was right. Lucky me!

Nobody tells the truth 100% of the time (see also: "white lies"). The first test of a bad deception is whether it hurts anyone. What you propose isn't harmful if she doesn't go for it, apart from you knowing you've tried to do something a bit manipulative.

But the next test is: what would be the fallout if the deception was discovered? What if she did begin fucking this hypothetical guy, and then later found out you'd set up the whole thing?

I'm not trying to suggest that would necessarily be a disaster. The answer probably depends a lot on your wife, and the relationship you have, and how it went with the guy. But it's a thought experiment you should run through, I think. Best case, maybe she'd say, "you're an asshole, but I'm having fun, so whatever!". Worst case? ...? What if he mistreated her, and/or she regretted the whole thing, and it turned out to be something you'd set up?

In my wife's case, coming here to OHW and doing some reading seemed to flip the switch for her. Maybe at first, she just wanted to understand me better. At some point, she obviously decided that Hotwifing - and guys like us - aren't all that weird after all. As Farmgirl told her, "We're just real women in happy marriages!" At some point, she obviously decided it sounded like fun.

Does your wife know about OHW? Maybe instead of deception, radical openness is the way.

[Wifesharing]

Do you think its bad to get a bull to seduce her? She wouldn't be doing anything she didn't want to do of course. But there is a deception if I were to plot with the bull without her knowledge, particularly if I were to give him hints on how to act or maybe even give him an idea of where she will be and when so that they meet "spontaneously". I think if I were to introduce him as a bull, that just wouldn't fly.

It is never a good idea. I mean if you just setup a guy being in the same place as you two and let him know it was safe to hit on her that would be fairly harmless. However your wife is not likely to take it that way. At least my wife gets a pretty big ego boost when a guy hits on her and try to pick her up, If she was to find out arrange to guy to do it and she found out it would crush her, no matter how I tried to explain how little I setup it would still be wrong in her eyes. Plus she would then have doubts about the how genuine the entire flirting was.

While it has crossed most of our minds It is not really a good idea and really you don't want to be that kind of husband do you?

Now if you approached her prior and said hey maybe I can find guys and tell them it is okay to flirt with you, express that you would not give tips just he okay and if she is open to it that is fine. It is not sneaky it is in the open.

[Long Lurker 34]

Last night she was upset because a dude she works with, a senior VIP-type, got into some email banter with her that got extremely suggestive. Honestly, I'm shocked to see it in 2025. She was legitimately upset and thinks he's slime and of course, I was supportive and angry on her behalf. She's not going to take any action at this time aside from giving him the cold shoulder and hopefully he takes the hint.

But of course, I will share with you all that I spent half the night masturbating about it. Found him on LinkedIn, looked up his socials. Saw that he's divorced. Damn I wish she was interested!

QH
- I hope she kept those emails or forwarded them to herself at home, not for anything sexual, as a "just in case" for HR in the future.

[Long Lurker 34]

Damn I wish she was interested!

Sounds like this guy may not be droid you're looking for

In terms of rediscovering her sexiness, I would offer that deliberate flirting in public might be a helpful thing. It's harmless (if she wants it to be) and makes everyone feel good. Most attractive women, whether they do it consciously or not, give off a well-practiced "don't pester me" vibe to strange men, particularly when they are in a relationship. Turning that off probably requires a deliberate decision and a bit of practice.

OTOH I think my own wife is rubbish at IRL flirting (I think she agrees) and could probably do with upping her game in that regard. There have been guys who have piqued her interest, but I've had to coach her to return their looks, smiles, etc. Flirting doesn't seem to come naturally to her. She's hot for a guy at her local hair salon, and he sounds interested, but she just can't seem to give him enough encouragement, and she's too shy to do anything overt like slipping him her number.

LM
- If she is chatty with him encourage her when she goes to make a point on something to just lightly touch his forearm. That might be enough to get things started.

[leggysman]

Does your wife know about OHW? Maybe instead of deception, radical openness is the way.

Let's get your wife talking to my wife, and not just the two of us talking to one another

Side note: In addition to the lovely VHWs here on OHW, leggysandy does have one additional hotwife friend she talks to fairly frequently. That lady is not here on OHW herself, but she's someone that many of us here have admired (drooled over), and read a lot about

[sandy691196]

Do you think its bad to get a bull to seduce her? She wouldn't be doing anything she didn't want to do of course. But there is a deception if I were to plot with the bull without her knowledge, particularly if I were to give him hints on how to act or maybe even give him an idea of where she will be and when so that they meet "spontaneously". I think if I were to introduce him as a bull, that just wouldn't fly.

The answer to your situation may lie in something she has shared with you a while back and you shared with us in turn.

The content of her sexting with Aaron.
1. She sexted with someone 30 yrs her junior with whom no relationship risk is envisaged. Just fun.
2. Her fantasies were about multiple guys, playing hooker for a night and rape. Again scenarios where no messy relationship issues are likely to result.
3. She texted and flirted with the mover boys. The demographics are such that no relationship is on the cards.

4. She went boat riding with a bunch of young guys Lord knows what happened there for 45 mins. Do note that she lied to you about the dating app and only squared up when there was a risk of it getting back to you due to Aaron.

4. She avoided any guy who is in her league.. after the initial flirting- wine tasting old man, wine tasting young rep., VP guy and others.

I think she is scared of relationship mess ups through the lifestyle. She has told you this in so many words.

She is more ok with guys and situations where it's only sex with no relationship complications likely.

You may want to lead her along this line and drop all the stuff about "compatible", her type guys..

It may pay to develop and explore those safe fantasies together and then one day work up a real thing.

[QuietHope]

The answer to your situation may lie in something she has shared with you a while back and you shared with is in turn.

The content of her sexting with Aaron.
1. She sexted with someone 30 yrs her junior with whom no relationship risk is envisaged. Just fun.
2. Her fantasies were about multiple guys, playing hooker for a night and rape. Again scenarios where no messy relationship issues are likely to result.
3. She texted and flirted with the mover boys. The demographics are such that no relationship is on the cards.

4. She went boat riding with a bunch of young guys Lord knows what happened there for 45 mins. Do note that she lied to you about the dating app and only squared up when there was a risk of it getting back to you due to Aaron.

4. She avoided any guy who is in her league.. after the initial flirting- wine tasting old man, wine tasting young rep., VP guy and others.

I think she is scared of relationship mess ups through the lifestyle. She has told you this in so many words.

She is more ok with guys and situations where it's only sex with no relationship complications likely.

You may want to lead her along this line and drop all the stuff about "compatible", her type guys..

It may pay to develop and explore those safe fantasies together and then one day work up a real thing.

Holy f'ing sh!t. That's an amazing analysis and totally rings true. I can't believe that I never saw that pattern and you're right, her actions completely jive with what she has said has been her reasons for hesitation. My god I've been so frustrated thinking she was erratic but looking at it the way you describe makes sense. I'm not exactly sure how to use this revelation but thank you Sir!

[sandy691196]

The answer to your situation may lie in something she has shared with you a while back and you shared with is in turn.

The content of her sexting with Aaron.
1. She sexted with someone 30 yrs her junior with whom no relationship risk is envisaged. Just fun.
2. Her fantasies were about multiple guys, playing hooker for a night and rape. Again scenarios where no messy relationship issues are likely to result.
3. She texted and flirted with the mover boys. The demographics are such that no relationship is on the cards.

4. She went boat riding with a bunch of young guys Lord knows what happened there for 45 mins. Do note that she lied to you about the dating app and only squared up when there was a risk of it getting back to you due to Aaron.

4. She avoided any guy who is in her league.. after the initial flirting- wine tasting old man, wine tasting young rep., VP guy and others.

I think she is scared of relationship mess ups through the lifestyle. She has told you this in so many words.

She is more ok with guys and situations where it's only sex with no relationship complications likely.

You may want to lead her along this line and drop all the stuff about "compatible", her type guys..

It may pay to develop and explore those safe fantasies together and then one day work up a real thing.

Holy f'ing sh!t. That's an amazing analysis and totally rings true. I can't believe that I never saw that pattern and you're right, her actions completely jive with what she has said has been her reasons for hesitation. My god I've been so frustrated thinking she was erratic but looking at it the way you describe makes sense. I'm not exactly sure how to use this revelation but thank you Sir!

I believe the trick is to match and mirror the thoughts and inputs coming from her genuinely. That's psychologically correct as well as ethical, since that negates cynical manipulation of one's life partner.

Her fantasies, narratives, actual behavior (including flirting as well as avoidance), all reflect her inner feelings. If your attempts to get her into hotwifing are in alignment with her inner feelings, then chances of success are the best.

In this case her feelings support extra marital sex with socially incompatible men (age, background, social circle). Aaron is the best bet as of today since she has actually indulged with sexting and experienced orgasms with him.

He is in college now, hence not part of your daily life. He is a known quantity, hence safe.. The concept is incredibly naughty and sexy since he is friends' son!

Best is you say that you have been thinking from her POV and feel that you haven't been attentive enough to her concerns. Summarize those concerns first (relationship complications, clinginess, emotional struggle).
Then you may summarize the qualities of an ideal sex mate-
Someone totally out of league socially but physically gratifying.
Take names- Aaron, those hauling guys etc.
Encourage her to role play with you pretending to be one of those guys (role play is her thing). Watch her responses. Make this a daily thing. Get her body to respond to their images as a matter of habit (Pavlovian response).

Then may come the opportunity for nudging her into real play.

[vb23456]

Any update?

[QuietHope]

Its been quiet here. We had some family health issues that required some flying and being out of pocket. However, one little nugget has my imagination moving.

S does some volunteer work for a major museum. I don't know how she has the time but she enjoys it. Nice people, like them all. I've met some of them at different events and the guys seem to be gay or much older academic types. Either way, I've never thought of them as being 'potentials'. However, she showed me an email she recently received.

"Thought you looked particularly ravishing in that outfit this afternoon when you greeted our special guests!"

A major donor was visiting that morning and she had worn a nice, simple dress which was flowery and a little low cut on the chest. Snug. And heels. Ravishing indeed.

If the email had been sent by one of the gay guys, we wouldn't have thought much of it but this was sent by one of the older academics who is not gay (married with kids). He's actually kind of famous, or maybe well-known in certain circles is a better description, and S has always been a little intimidated by him. Never thought of him sexually. She wanted to know if I thought he was being inappropriate under what's accepted in 2025.

I told her to have fun with it. Flirt back a little and see his reaction.

"Ravishing? My my, thank you. Let me know if you think I ought to dress up more often for our highly valued guests."

"YES!" was his immediate response.

She left it at that.

[hornedhubby]

Nice update.

She gave him the bounce pass right in the hands. Let's see if he takes a shot.

Smart and sexy woman!

His move.

Best wishes and thanks for sharing!

[QuietHope]

She went into the museum today. She was dressed in jeans a blouse and looked good but I got her to change into a professional skirt, knee length, heels and a nice blouse. I undid the top button and told her to smile, be friendly and laugh at his jokes today, no matter how bad. Touch him when you laugh. Not sure what will happen.

[QuietHope]

I hear that it went well. He definitely noticed and they spoke and joked around some and she flirted back. She says "its just fun". She did also tell me that dressing a little sexier attracted attention from other guys as well. I continue to hope.